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Thread: A Gender Spectrum?

  1. #1

    Default A Gender Spectrum?

    I've been having some gender-related wonderings recently. By now, most people in society seem to at least be aware that it's possible for a person to have a gender identification that doesn't match their biological sex. It's possible for a biological man to be a woman, and for a biological woman to be a man.

    My question is: is it possible to be partway between the two? Somewhere between cis- and transgendered?

    This was mostly brought up by a shopping trip I was on last night. I went out and bought some new women's underwear and a dress. While I was shopping, I suddenly had this overwhelming feeling of being female. Like I was identifying with the other gender. I get these flashes sometimes. But they're not lasting or permanent. They come and go.

    Basically, I'm happy with my male gender and don't want to transition. But sometimes I wish to be a woman. I want to express myself that way, be seen as female, and identify myself that way. Not even as an LG, but an adult woman. At the same time, not permanently. I like being male. But sometimes, the other side seems to appear...

    So basically, is there a term for this? Switching between cis- and fully transgender, or being halfway between the two? Or is it something else altogether?

    (I'd also like to take some time to express my respect and appreciation for all the transgender people and activists who've made it safe for a guy to go shopping for girls' clothes and not face reprisal. People like you have made the world a better place for all of us! Keep spreading the message of love )

  2. #2

    Default

    I do not know if there is a specific name for what you are describing, but I see it as very possible. There are very few things in life that are black and white, zero or one, light or dark. Most things have a little bit of everything in them.

    I don't think you have any problem. Just enjoy the feelings when they come.

  3. #3

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Adventurer View Post
    So basically, is there a term for this? Switching between cis- and fully transgender, or being halfway between the two? Or is it something else altogether?
    I don't want to label you, but you might want to read up about "genderqueer" - queer in this case used in the old Germanic sense of being "out of alignment" - you sound like you might fit with one or two of the types covered by that label... most probably "gender fluid"?

    It's a fairly new term and it has a lacks hard definition, but here's something from what is (I believe) a widely recognised summary definition.



    Quote Originally Posted by GenderqueerID
    Defining genderqueer:

    Genderqueer is a term that may be used to describe those with non-normative gender, either as an umbrella term or a stand-alone identity, typically encompassing those who are in one, or more, of these six categories:

    both man and woman (example: androgyne)
    neither man nor woman (agender, neutrois, non-gendered)
    moving between two or more genders (gender fluid)
    third gendered or other-gendered (includes those who prefer “genderqueer” or “non-binary” to describe their gender without labeling it otherwise)
    having an overlap or blur of gender and orientation and/or sex (girlfags and guydykes)
    those who “queer” gender, in presentation or otherwise, who may or may not see themselves as non-binary or having a gender that is queer; this category may also include those who are consciously political or radical in their understanding of being genderqueer
    You might also want to check out the sub-reddit for genderqueer as it has links to lots of resources and discussions.

    Hope this is useful :-)

  4. #4

    Default

    My point of view is now from the other side, i.e. feeling more or less female and kinda manly... as a consequence. But perhaps it might be something to go on.

    So I mean it's kind of different for me from day to day, or to be specific where I am at any given point and what I'm doing, about how I feel about what gender... I represent(?), mentally.
    Usually it's just how it is, when I'm getting ready in the morning. Sometimes I feel pretty much quite girlish, so I dress up to show that - wanting to look good as one, for myself. Looking good for another person is obviously something complete different in my eyes.
    But on the other hand, on a lot of days I'm just like ~ screw that, I'm only going to university... so why should I waste time. So I only tie up my hair, slip into some jeans and a cardigan, and that's it. I don't even spend 5 minutes for anything cosmetic related... I don't bother to do so.
    And secondly, especially if I'm around a lot of male friends, I kind of start to replicate their behaviour. Not everything exactly, but you get the idea, I hope ;-). I'm simply relaxing, I don't want to be the prima donna, why should I? It's just some friends, and I don't need to act or be cute either. Though I don't think I'd pass as a guy in their sight, but I still feel pretty manly at those times.

    As long as you're fine with your body, as it is, it's okay I believe. No need to change anything as long as you're able to do whatever you want, or however gender neutral, atypical in the classic definition of your own sex or how female you may be at any given point.
    To be quite honest... I think this is just normal, or should be to say this aloud. Everyone is different to some degree, some things fit into either this or that. We do feel more or less drawn to a specific gender role, or less to our own mostly. And if you think about it too, aren't those pretty stereotypical ideas on itself? The only thing that matters is if you're okay with how you are as a whole.... However that might only be my disgust to label things, which shouldn't need to get.

    But anyway, it's cis or being genderfluid in my eyes. You're only feeling more attracted, depending on what you're doing and how you are, towards a specific role. Or your personality has simply different traits which are distinct gender specific characteristics.

    Don't worry too much, you're fine the way you are. =)
    Last edited by daLira; 12-Dec-2013 at 00:26. Reason: minor mistakes ~.~

  5. #5

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Adventurer View Post
    My question is: is it possible to be partway between the two? Somewhere between cis- and transgendered?
    Is this possible? Yes. I believe that it is possible, because I feel the same way.



    Quote Originally Posted by Adventurer View Post
    , I'm happy with my male gender and don't want to transition. But sometimes I wish to be a woman. I want to express myself that way, be seen as female, and identify myself that way. Not even as an LG, but an adult woman. At the same time, not permanently. I like being male. But sometimes, the other side seems to appear...
    You have basically described everything that I feel. Wow, I never knew there was anyone else like that. For me, it is very new to me to feel this way so it is hard to describe how I feel and how it affects my life. As in, unlike you I have yet to buy any female clothes but I do personally feel as if I am a woman (and a man!)

    You are just fine! You should live your life the way you want to, Matilda!

    --Nadia

  6. #6

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    I know everyone's different, but on another level, it's sometimes nice to find a label. The reason being, mainly, is that you realize there are enough people in the world just like you that they have a word (or phrase) for it. I don't know. Sometimes the idea is comforting, and maybe that's what Adventurer was wondering about. Maybe that's just my own feelings and my endless quest to feel less alienated, though.

    Based on what Miss Clara wrote/linked here, I am leaning toward this concept of "gender fluid." It really seems to fit - sort of going between genders without needing/wanting to stick to some particular spot on the gender identity spectrum.

    Here's two surprisingly unoffensive, rated PG definitions from Urban Dictionary.

    Oh hey, it's also known as bigender and here's the wikipedia on it. It says it's a subset of trans. So... technically... ya know. Technically...
    Last edited by Frogsy; 12-Dec-2013 at 11:10. Reason: reasons

  7. #7

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Adventurer View Post
    Basically, I'm happy with my male gender and don't want to transition. But sometimes I wish to be a woman. I want to express myself that way, be seen as female, and identify myself that way. Not even as an LG, but an adult woman. At the same time, not permanently. I like being male. But sometimes, the other side seems to appear...
    I found out about this interesting piece of research done in Israel which found that more than 1/3 of people have some feeling of identifying with the 'other' gender...

  8. #8

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    Dear Adventurer
    Very thoughtful observation and i do agree full heartily. Lately i have just discovered aboriginal old history describes the soul with twin spirits. As a Ojibwa Indian who is removed from my people long ago found that the elders are quite understanding with people with twin spirits. The world i know is getting better and better every day and i don't feel very odd any more.
    Sincerely mypet

  9. #9

    Default

    I'm totally confused as far as who I am. I'll swing from one end to the other instantly. Usually after choking the chicken.
    I become disgusted with the other state I was in before, so I worry much about how this would effect my relation with any partner.
    I don't know what to do so I don't pursue any relationship, other then snuggles with my stuffed animals.

  10. #10

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by MickeyM View Post
    I'm totally confused as far as who I am. I'll swing from one end to the other instantly. Usually after choking the chicken.
    I become disgusted with the other state I was in before, so I worry much about how this would effect my relation with any partner.
    I don't know what to do so I don't pursue any relationship, other then snuggles with my stuffed animals.
    So people have ingrained moral oppression that don't hold to it causes guilt and shame without them knowing the reason why.

    - - - Updated - - -



    Quote Originally Posted by Adventurer View Post
    I've been having some gender-related wonderings recently. By now, most people in society seem to at least be aware that it's possible for a person to have a gender identification that doesn't match their biological sex. It's possible for a biological man to be a woman, and for a biological woman to be a man.

    My question is: is it possible to be partway between the two? Somewhere between cis- and transgendered?

    This was mostly brought up by a shopping trip I was on last night. I went out and bought some new women's underwear and a dress. While I was shopping, I suddenly had this overwhelming feeling of being female. Like I was identifying with the other gender. I get these flashes sometimes. But they're not lasting or permanent. They come and go.

    Basically, I'm happy with my male gender and don't want to transition. But sometimes I wish to be a woman. I want to express myself that way, be seen as female, and identify myself that way. Not even as an LG, but an adult woman. At the same time, not permanently. I like being male. But sometimes, the other side seems to appear...

    So basically, is there a term for this? Switching between cis- and fully transgender, or being halfway between the two? Or is it something else altogether?

    (I'd also like to take some time to express my respect and appreciation for all the transgender people and activists who've made it safe for a guy to go shopping for girls' clothes and not face reprisal. People like you have made the world a better place for all of us! Keep spreading the message of love )
    Though gender spectrum is wider than most people will ever accept. This a lovely site on gender spectrum and sexuality It's pronounced metro sexual also try the gender book both deal with gender though you do not need to label yourself though it may make you more comfortable bi-gender is something I see a lot more of these days in the circles I run in as people have term besides two-spirit to call themselvs. Some people identify as just a person because they feel gender fluid is to binding but feel they have a gender. Some people identify as non-gender and many other options there no one solid gender in reality that you must be and swapping in between is fine I have most often heard it called bi-gender though.
    btw as informational
    I am a Trans* Female so this is just my perspective,
    Good luck to you Adventure and to all those finding their way it is a long road and one we may walk all our lives but it is the walking as much as the destination that counts for we learning many things on the way.
    Sincerely
    Emily Adella

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