Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 20

Thread: Real life meeting

  1. #1

    Default Real life meeting

    Ok. This is the first thread that I have ever started, so please be kind!
    I have never met an other diaper lover. I really want to but due to my job and my location it has always proved impossible to get to a MUNCH. I want to meet other ABDLs so that I can talk about all sorts of things to do with why we are the way we are. I also just want some company that understands me a little.
    I think that I would be a good Daddy to an AB as long as there was no sexual relationship.

    I am a 35 year old DL in the North East of England. What do I need to do? How should I go about meeting others? Does any one have any helpful advice?

  2. #2

    Default

    I am giving a response since I saw that you posted 3 days ago and no one responded to your questions in the final paragraph. It is doubtful that most other viewers read down that far.

    To meet AB/DL people in real life, you either have to go to real life meetings or have someone here get to know you well enough and desire to meet you in person. Excuses why you cannot go to a standard public meeting (Munch) may scare some people here away. Meeting in person requires a much higher degree of trust than communicating via a forum.

    Is there a reason you need someone in person to discuss things? On this site, you can get input from a much larger audience and receive more than one perspective. Additionally, you have a higher degree of anonymity and safety here. Meeting in person risks your personal safety and reputation.

    By suggesting that you think you would be a "good Daddy", I felt as though you may expect that to occur when you meet someone in person. First meetings are normally not in a private location where this could occur. The level of trust and compatibility required for that is far above a first meeting. Expecting that from a first meeting should scare people away. Search this forum and the Internet for safety suggestions regarding meeting strangers from the Internet in person.

    My suggestion for you to meet people from here in real life is to be active and open here first. This includes AB, DL, and off-topic forums. Over time, you and another person may eventually be mutually interested in meeting in real life. However, it is also possible to scare others away. Starting a thread to ask to meet people people with less than 30 posts and only 3 threads with a join date of March 2009 is counter-productive because it shows both a desperation to meet in real life and a lack of openness here. These facts signal to me a possible hidden agenda and would have caused me to decline if meeting was an option.

    I wish you the best of luck in meeting someone in real life. Trust me, it can happen.

  3. #3

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Jeremiah View Post
    I am giving a response since I saw that you posted 3 days ago and no one responded to your questions in the final paragraph. It is doubtful that most other viewers read down that far.

    To meet AB/DL people in real life, you either have to go to real life meetings or have someone here get to know you well enough and desire to meet you in person. Excuses why you cannot go to a standard public meeting (Munch) may scare some people here away. Meeting in person requires a much higher degree of trust than communicating via a forum.

    Is there a reason you need someone in person to discuss things? On this site, you can get input from a much larger audience and receive more than one perspective. Additionally, you have a higher degree of anonymity and safety here. Meeting in person risks your personal safety and reputation.

    By suggesting that you think you would be a "good Daddy", I felt as though you may expect that to occur when you meet someone in person. First meetings are normally not in a private location where this could occur. The level of trust and compatibility required for that is far above a first meeting. Expecting that from a first meeting should scare people away. Search this forum and the Internet for safety suggestions regarding meeting strangers from the Internet in person.

    My suggestion for you to meet people from here in real life is to be active and open here first. This includes AB, DL, and off-topic forums. Over time, you and another person may eventually be mutually interested in meeting in real life. However, it is also possible to scare others away. Starting a thread to ask to meet people people with less than 30 posts and only 3 threads with a join date of March 2009 is counter-productive because it shows both a desperation to meet in real life and a lack of openness here. These facts signal to me a possible hidden agenda and would have caused me to decline if meeting was an option.

    I wish you the best of luck in meeting someone in real life. Trust me, it can happen.
    Thank you for this response.

    I had never thought of things as you described them. You have opened my eyes.

    I have always wanted to go to a MUNCH, there is one in London that I have tried to get to. But have not managed it yet. So I am going to make it my New Years resolution to go there and meet people.

    Is there a reason why I need to meet someone in person? Yes but only this: I find it difficult to talk to people in writing. I am much more comfortable verbally communicating in person. On the personal safety side of things I agree with your point.

    Good daddy? I would not expect this to happen after a first meeting if it were to happen at all. What I am after is friends who I don't have to hide my DL side from. Now i read your comment above I can see how this could make it look like it was something I expected, it is not.

    Few posts & hidden agenda: I see what you mean. I have lurked for a long time. Often other people have made comments that I agreed with so I saw no point in posting. I will try to put this right. As for the hidden agenda: there isn't one. I just want to meet people who are like me.

    Thank you again you have been really helpful

  4. #4

    Default

    The first time I meet another ABDL in person it was a (at the time) friend of a friend - now its more friend but I digress. We happened to both be at the right place and the right time to meet up, so we figured we would. Spent an hour talking together at a Starbucks. Weirdly I feel it was the final hurdle in accepting myself, so it was pretty productive (and fun).

    Anyway, really its about finding someone that is reasonably trustworthy and meeting up with them in a public place. Go from there. If you can find a munch that's the ideal situation since there will be a bunch of people you have a chance to connect with (when I lived in Toronto I was able to go to a monthly munch there and it was a fantastic way to meet people). Otherwise start talking to people, all kinds of people. The AB community is small, we're all only a few degrees of separation from each other. Eventually you'll find a friend of a friend that's nearby. Those meetings may or may not go well (its less sure than a munch) but, well, that's why you preferably do it in a public place where you can do something else if things get awkward.

    Oh, and there are ABs near you. Guaranteed. I'm on the same campus as Eulogy, I'm a short car trip away from Lobie and I know or know of quite a few local ABDLs/Babyfurs. I come from a fairly isolated and small community (there really isn't anywhere in England that I would consider more "in the woods" than where I currently live) so there surely are ABs in your neck of the woods, too.

    Oh, and if you're insane like I am you can always just fly out and meet people but, well, as I said, I'm a bit insane.

  5. #5

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by pip View Post
    I had never thought of things as you described them. You have opened my eyes.

    ...I find it difficult to talk to people in writing. I am much more comfortable verbally communicating in person...
    Thank you for responding and clarifying. I know the feeling of being misunderstood and having difficulty communicating. Only for me, it is verbal communication that is more difficult. Within the last few months, people have shared with me some key pieces of information for me to significantly improve my verbal skills. Instead of focusing on how bad I am, I choose to learn what could be improved, implement those changes, and gain more experience.

    I know you can write good posts because of your response I am quoting. Through experience, you will gain confidence and skill. If a post is not received correctly, don't worry about it, figure out why it went wrong, and do better next time.

    Be mindful of message, audience, context, and perception. When typing a post, focus on the intended message, make sure everything supports that message, and leave out unnecessary details. As an example of audience, a post here must meet the written rules and match common expectations. Context is the required background information for statements to be received correctly. Leaving this out is a common error of mine and creates problems. Sharing that you have difficulty with written communication and desire an opportunity to verbally communicate with others regarding AB/DL topics in the opening post would have prevented us from jumping to the wrong conclusion on your motives for posting. Perception is how the recipient will receive your message; this is another difficulty of mine. Is my word choice going to appear helpful, attacking, or creepy? When typing, I can spend hours figuring out the precise wording and editing my message. Sometimes, I will even type up my message in a document program to use the spelling and grammar tools to get everything correct. Unfortunately, I cannot do this for normal conversations.

    Thank you for starting this thread and sharing more about yourself. I am looking forward to communicating with you more in the future.

  6. #6

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Near View Post
    Oh, and if you're insane like I am you can always just fly out and meet people but, well, as I said, I'm a bit insane.
    Alternatively if you're me, you can just convince people to fly out and meet you (across international borders), but well, you'll meet people who are a bit insane.

  7. #7

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Fruitkitty View Post
    Alternatively if you're me, you can just convince people to fly out and meet you (across international borders), but well, you'll meet people who are a bit insane.
    You've convinced people to fly across international borders to meet with you? I'm curious as to where you are and where they were from. Did everything turn out alright?

  8. #8

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Mattew View Post
    You've convinced people to fly across international borders to meet with you? I'm curious as to where you are and where they were from. Did everything turn out alright?
    I've done that with people who weren't even into diapers

  9. #9

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Mattew View Post
    You've convinced people to fly across international borders to meet with you? I'm curious as to where you are and where they were from. Did everything turn out alright?
    He was talking about me. Two year of dating, still together.

  10. #10

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Trevor View Post
    I've done that with people who weren't even into diapers
    I've never heard about doing that kind of stuff. But I guess that's just me. I rarely get to travel.



    Quote Originally Posted by Near View Post
    He was talking about me. Two year of dating, still together.
    Ahh. I see the both of your avatars now.

Similar Threads

  1. Baby life merging into real life
    By Babyboyuk21 in forum Adult Babies & Littles
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 05-Jul-2013, 09:59
  2. Meeting in real life.
    By davetheodore in forum Adult Babies & Littles
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 14-Mar-2013, 08:03
  3. A real life meeting of "littles"?
    By notarealname in forum Adult Babies & Littles
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 15-Feb-2012, 06:42
  4. Meeting in real life
    By Mr. Marley in forum Mature Topics
    Replies: 23
    Last Post: 12-Aug-2008, 23:18

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
ADISC.org - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community.
ADISC.org is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.