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Thread: Girlfriend problems, was this justified?

  1. #1

    Default Girlfriend problems, was this justified?

    Let me give you the backround story before getting to my question here.

    My now ex girlfriend had dumped me a couple of months ago, but recently she called me out of the blue.

    The conversation went sorta like this, she started with "are you doing anything the next two weeks?"

    In reply I said, "No, I'm off on Tuesday this week what's the matter are you ok?"

    Then she said, "I'm okay, I need to talk to you about something can we meet up for dinner and talk? My car is broken so can you meet me down here around 5pm Tuesday?"

    In reply I said, "Yeah that's totally not a problem I can leave here about 2pm after my college classes"

    So at that point come tuesday I left class and started to head out. I used my cell phone as a gps because I'm always getting losed. Well the cell phone quit working so I plugged it in the car charger and it wouldnt charge.

    At this point I was forced to stop and ask for directions. After 6 different directions and getting losed I ended up in Boston an hour out of my way. Fustrated I stopped and bought another car charger.

    Needless to say It worked just long enough to get to my destination then died again. Apparently I had a manufacturing glitch with my phone which I got fixed shortly after.

    Anyways, what should have been 1 hr 30 min drive which should have got me there around 3:30 exactly by gps estimated time I got there at 5:45.

    Then, I recieved a voicemail saying, "I thought you were going to be here at 5. I had plans at 6. Tonights not going to work out we are gonna have to reschedule. I wanted to tell you that I think we should go our seprete ways im making alot of changes in my life and wanted to to tell you before you found out on facebook"

    Annoyed that a total round trip car ride that should have been 3 hrs turned into 5 hours I drove home driving down to mass for nothing.


    Do you think it was justified? She didnt bother to listen to my side of the story and refused to awnser my phone calls 6 times. Do you think it should have went differently?

    Im officially done but I just wanted to get some opinions because I think the whole thing is messed up. Has anything like this happend to you?

  2. #2


    So if I'm understanding correctly, you were already broken up, and then she told you she's breaking up with you again?

    I dont know why you broke up in the first place, but typically once these things are over, it's best to let them lie. Relationships end for a reason. And if it ended because of an impulsive fight or a snap judgement, that's a sign of immaturity on the part of someone in the relationship. So unless there was some other factor here, I'd let it lie.

    As to why you have to drive a million miles out of your way, why couldn't she just tell you over the phone? To me, this sounds like some sort of "test", like she wanted to see if you'd come. I could be wrong about this, but I had an ex who did similar things. There's a reason she's my ex. People who won't be straight with you, and make you drive hours for undefined conversations that could've been handled over the phone, probably aren't the kind of people you want to be in a relationship with. It sounds like a big drain on time and energy.

    So no, I dont think being forced into what sounds like a test was justified, and unless there's something pretty major that you didn't mention before, I wouldn't bother trying to get back together with her anymore. There are nice people out there. Look around for them instead of going through more headaches.

  3. #3


    Yeah that pretty much sums the whole thing up in a nutshell. She initally told me the first time she wanted to be friends out of nowhere. We never had any fights or anything. Yeah im done with it. Deffintley sounds like a test. Thats exactly what I said about talking about it on the phone instead oh well not worth my time

  4. #4


    Well life sometimes is full of wasted time...

    Make the most out of it: take it as a lesson.

    And maybe tell her, exactly that... that you don't know why you should feel good about wasting your time.
    Wish her all the best, but let her know she's on her own.

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