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Thread: Introduction

  1. #1

    Default Introduction

    Hi,
    My little boy (husband) and I have just recently realized after a traumatic emotional breakdown that he is an AB and has been for his entire life (just didn't know it until now). Over the past few months I have been researching information and sites to help me to help him and to meet his needs. I hope to learn here and input when I have something valuable to add. Thank you for being here for this very special need for very special little people.
    Raemommy

  2. #2

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    Welcome. I am still kinda new around here .. but I have found a lot of helpful topics and people here ... I have not found my inner little yet. I am looking, but I am def a DL. What do ya'll enjoy doing in your free time. I enjoy Bowling, Geocaching, Movies, Music.

    Greg / dragon9981

  3. #3

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    Hi Greg...thanks for the welcome. Actually we have 5 children...2 older daughters and triplet 5 year old boys who are special needs...so we have our hands full!!! We love music (when the house isn't too crazy) and day trips. Since we discovered my husband's interesting "issue" we are trying to take at least one day a week to do a "Mommy and Me" day just the two of us...this coming next weekend I am taking him to a local Gun Show and depending on the weather we may pack a picnic lunch (something we have never done before in 20 years!!!)...We probably sound so boring! Hope to chat soon and thanks again for the welcome...Raemommy

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by Raemommy View Post
    Hi,
    My little boy (husband) and I have just recently realized after a traumatic emotional breakdown that he is an AB and has been for his entire life (just didn't know it until now). Over the past few months I have been researching information and sites to help me to help him and to meet his needs. I hope to learn here and input when I have something valuable to add. Thank you for being here for this very special need for very special little people.
    Raemommy
    Given the story you just related, this is definitely the site you would want to rely on, at least at first, for advice and information. We are here for lending support not just to ab's and dl's, but to their significant others including their wives or boyfriends or girlfriends.

    Now, it seems appropriate here to explain a bit about ab's and dl's.(the two terms don't mean precisely the same thing inside the community) Roughly speaking, ab = adult baby, dl = diaper lover. Most abdl people are both, but there are exceptions. I, for instance am all dl: it's entirely a fetish for me. Many ab's enjoy regression and ageplay but may not find it a turnon; they get pleasant feelings all right, but often more along the lines of feeling free from stress and worry. Dressing up in baby gear and acting infantile makes them feel safe and taken care of, especially if a parent figure is involved. Most ageplayers play at being young; hence they call themselves "littles." Not all littles imagine themselves as babies as such; toddler through 6 or 7 is also a common age range. Some littles aren't into diapers either: some might like to play at being around grade 1 or 2, and fly kites or play with lego as littles, still being younger than in real life but well past being in diapers (okay, except maybe at night.)

    There is yet more variation when a person is also a furry. Babyfurs are infant or child anthropomorphic characters,able to speak as a human and stand and walk bipedally. Babyfurs have a blend of human and furry characteristics, with their age being equivalent to a human child or infant's, and most often still wearing diapers as part of their persona, or as we like to call it, their fursona. I call myself a diaperfur, meaning that my imagined age is the same as mine in real life, but I imagine myself as an anthropomorphic raccoon with a diaper fetish.

    There are endless examples of cartoons of anthropomorphic animals, from ones for whom the only difference between them and actual animals is that they can talk, as in Bambi; to ones where they think, dress, and act pretty much as people. here's one image of babyfur art, made by Anuk, an
    Adisc member. Click image for larger version. 

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    Back to ageplayers whose identity is as a human: it must be pointed out that liking to imagine oneself as a child, does not involve being attracted to actual children. That's the main misconception about abdl people.

    Otherwise, you should understand, abdl people can be gay, straight, bisexual, or asexual. We can be male, female or transgendered. We can imagine ourselves as strictly human or as being a furry, or something else. We can even be religious or atheist. If a person is abdl it's part of their identity, who they are, all other considerations aside. There's a new thread on Adisc about ways we might use to explain our "thing" to others I am certain you will find useful; it is https://www.adisc.org/forum/adult-ba...non-abdls.html
    They offer explanations in many voices and from different viewpoints. Hearing them will give a better idea what it's all about than any single post.

    I do have to add that our "thing" - whether you want to call it a fetish, a lifestyle, an identity or a private game, is very frequently connected, directly or indirectly, with psychological trauma. It is very common - the rule, more than the exception - to have had difficulty with coping with life in some major and enduring way. Now all by itself, being ab or dl is NOT a mental illness. But by the same token many of us do have some affliction, we are often troubled people. You said

    My little boy (husband) ...realized after a traumatic emotional breakdown that he is an AB ..and has been for his entire life (just didn't know it until now). .
    I am guessing he just hadn't put a name to his "thing?" It's incredibly common for many of us to assume we're alone in this. As it turns out, I have reason to believe there are well over 50,000 of us in the English speaking world, not to mention all of the non-English language world. That 50,000 is a rough guess at the enrolled members of English language abdl websites; there are French, German, Swedish, Japanese, Dutch websites too.

    Shyness is really common among us, and protecting ourselves from our "secret" being discovered. There seems to be a common theme of embarrassment about it, and confronting our "quirk" head on can mean emotional upheaval. Perhaps all the emphasis on growing up causes our shame at clinging to being young. And it's compounded when the tokens of childhood become fetishes.

    All sorts of people who are a little different to the norm have support sites, and we are no different. Being different gets a person misunderstood, even shunned, treated as a leper. It used to be pretty tough to be gay, probably still is for kids hitting puberty and having to come to terms with it. Yes, schizophrenics and depressives have support clubs and societies. Well, so do recent immigrants.

    Be that as it may, you should note that in this abdl world, being employed is the norm... plenty of us are parents and good parents. The abdl people I know are pretty functional. We have oodles of professionals among us. Many have higher education. We just happen to have a side that we keep private. I'm sorry that your hubby had to have his breakdown. I am glad you were there to help. And now we're here to help. David Bowie sang, in Changes, link to the song below

    So I turned myself to face me
    But I've never caught a glimpse of
    How the others must see the faker
    I'm much too fast to take that test
    Last edited by Raccoon; 23-Oct-2013 at 06:15.

  5. #5

  6. #6

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    Awesome!!! Thank you so much for all the information. Your assumptions regarding my husband and our "thing" is correct and I appreciate and thank you for taking the time to explain in detail...mainly he is for sure AB, however we are experimenting with diapers because of all the advice and comfort and security it provides...AND (drum roll please)...he loves diapers!!! We got adult cloth, paper (like pampers), and the depends from the drugstore (all 3 kinds) he loves them all for different reasons. He talks about comfort, safety, and trust...things I have never heard from his mouth (for 20 years) before. I love him very much and since we have been addressing this "thing" we have certainly increased our intimacy, and for sure made him a much calmer and better person.
    Thank you again for the information (great details).

  7. #7

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    You're absolutely lucky he has you, and however the truth came out, it worked out for the best.Now I expect Diaper Talk and Adult Baby will be the forums most useful to you. He could join up here, and the staff are aware of situations where two people post from one machine, and don't simply ban the second account out of hand as an alt account of the first one. It's good to have you both reading, and we hope he'll join up here soon.

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by Raemommy View Post
    Awesome!!! Thank you so much for all the information. Your assumptions regarding my husband and our "thing" is correct and I appreciate and thank you for taking the time to explain in detail...mainly he is for sure AB, however we are experimenting with diapers because of all the advice and comfort and security it provides...AND (drum roll please)...he loves diapers!!! We got adult cloth, paper (like pampers), and the depends from the drugstore (all 3 kinds) he loves them all for different reasons. He talks about comfort, safety, and trust...things I have never heard from his mouth (for 20 years) before. I love him very much and since we have been addressing this "thing" we have certainly increased our intimacy, and for sure made him a much calmer and better person.
    Thank you again for the information (great details).
    One book I recommend for you both is Rosalie Bent's "There's a baby in my bed" if you are interested in regular play, like a few hours a day, a few days a week; or an entire weekend or two a month.

    If you two just want to be "occasionals," like just when you are "gettin' it on" then Miss Penny Barber's "Age Play and Diaper Fetish Handbook."

  9. #9

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    Awesome! Thanks so much...been reading tons of books lately and most have very little info on this specific subject.

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by Raemommy View Post
    Awesome! Thanks so much...been reading tons of books lately and most have very little info on this specific subject.
    You have to order them online. They might have ebook versions you can get.

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