Results 1 to 10 of 10

Thread: Feeling like I should be in a better place.

  1. #1

    Default Feeling like I should be in a better place.

    I want to say that this feeling has been coming up la a lot lately. I feel like I should be somewhere better then where I am now. I still live at home with my parents. I'm going to college but I think I'm still a freshman. (I don't remember how many hour you need to be to be a sophomore) I want to have more then just one room. I recently and finally learned how boring and pointless my job is after FIVE long years. I just want more. More then what I have here now. I don't know if it's my superiority complex, but I have grown tired of my cage and want out. Does anyone know this feeling and how make it stop? I do want to advance with my life, and I know it takes time, but it seems to just drag on and on and on. I find myself wish for a quick end to the repetition, but I'm too smart to think that would ever happen. I sorry in advance if this seemed to have turned into a rant. I just feel trapped in my own life with no escape.

  2. #2


    I was in your shoes once. The only advice I can tell you how I took care of it myself. I had to have roommates if I wanted my own place away from home, but even that felt like a cage after some time had went by, not as bad as living at home but still enough to want more than what I had. Then I decided if I couldn't afford a home or trailer on my own, than maybe a camper would more my style until I could afford something better. I have to admit, even though it is small, it is still my own place, and there is no better feeling than being completely free. The only roommates I have now is, my wife, and her sister, which they both know about my little side and completely accept me that way, even thinks it is cute lol. So if you can't afford a place by yourself, than I would suggest looking into a camper until you can get what you really want so you have the freedom you want.

  3. #3


    Such is the way of life. dont worry, and dont hurry, you only get to live every day once, you should do your best to enjoy your time. Eventually your life will start to come along and once your ready and prepared you will get the opportunity to go anywhere u like.

  4. #4


    Quote Originally Posted by babygohan View Post
    I want to say that this feeling has been coming up la a lot lately. I feel like I should be somewhere better then where I am now. I still live at home with my parents. I'm going to college but I think I'm still a freshman. (I don't remember how many hour you need to be to be a sophomore) I want to have more then just one room. I recently and finally learned how boring and pointless my job is after FIVE long years. I just want more. More then what I have here now. I don't know if it's my superiority complex, but I have grown tired of my cage and want out. Does anyone know this feeling and how make it stop? I do want to advance with my life, and I know it takes time, but it seems to just drag on and on and on. I find myself wish for a quick end to the repetition, but I'm too smart to think that would ever happen. I sorry in advance if this seemed to have turned into a rant. I just feel trapped in my own life with no escape.
    This is the very drive that makes you human. The desire to want to BE more is a normal part of everyone's life, its what allows us and empowers us to leave the nest and make a living of our own. Don't let go of this, instead embrace it, use your dislike for your cage as your motivation to leave it, use your routine lifestyle as motivation to be MORE. I know it may sound overused but there are a lot of people (and I mean a LOT of people) who are perfectly happy sitting pretty at their parents house and wouldnt have it any other way, I have friends who are older than me (im 24) who still live with their parents despite having the ability to move out and get a new job and live on their own, the difference is that they complain and dont make an effort, and you have to make sure that doesn't happen to you as well. Not saying you are just complaining, I dont know you personally and I dont know how long you've been feeling this way, but seeing as its the first time i see it, it looks as though you've reached a point in your life where you WANT more, and that is a perfectly normal part of growing up, the only hard truth about it is that the only person who can change any of that, is you. You can have help, and you can have others show you the door to your future, but only you can open it, they can't open it for you (sorry for the lame matrix reference) You will notice that the moment you start to take charge of your own life and responsibilities, your doubts or feelings of repetition will slowly subside. But remember that everything takes planning; dont rush into things out of desperation, use your free-time to figure out what you're gonna do and how you're gonna do it- dont grow up too fast and try to enjoy what you have and remember that once you move forward there is no going back.

    I moved out of my parents house when I was 22 because I got married at 18, and leaving my house was scary and difficult and nerve wrecking and stressful... but 2 years later, I can tell you right now that the thought of going back is scarier because now that I have this freedom, going back sounds like prison to me. Don't forget that you're still young, and there is nothing wrong with being 24 and still living at home, there's a lot of people who feel just like you, and thats great; what seperates you from all the others is that you have a drive to move up, and as long as that drive is still pushing you, then nothing can stop you.

    And most importantly; dont give up hope. Lots of things might go wrong at first, and you might not find what you're looking for right away, but just keep fighting and keep searching and if you remain positive and keep struggling, something good will come your way; but thats not to say you wont get lucky and get everything right off the bat, just don't lose hope if it doesnt happen that way.. And remember: the only place where Success comes before Work is in the dictionary. Just remember to enjoy the ride. Imagine life as a roller coaster that looks insanely scary... and then imagine how accomplished you'll feel when you brave the stress and grasp your fear and come out unscathed on the other end Trust me, its very rewarding.

    I know some will tell you to just wait patiently, and in some cases this is true. But when it comes to craving change, the only person who can make that happen is you. I don't want to scare you or anything, but I learned the hard way that things wont just fall on your lap if you wait for them, I think often times people misunderstand the phrase "good things come to those who wait." Honestly, i believe it means that good things come to those who have patience... but doing nothing will get you just that, nothing. I believe in you <3

  5. #5


    I think there's a point in everyone's life when we want something more, and it can be frustrating when we can't identify exactly what we need to make it better. It's all part of being young. You're still finding yourself and it does take time.

    When I was your age (god, I hate saying that, it sounds so old), I was working at a dead end job in the government. The pay was great, lots of benefits and a good pension when I retire. The only problem was that I was bored out of my mind. I hated my work, but all the advice I received was to stay for the salary and benefits because I wouldn't get those anywhere else.

    I existed (I wouldn't call it living) for ten years before I made up my mind to quit and go back to school so I could work in Social Services. People thought I was quite insane to leave a steady well-paying job behind to become another starving student aiming for a career with lousy pay and limited employment opportunities.

    Twenty eight years later, I have absolutely no regrets. I've learned and done things I never thought I was capable of doing. I am well known and, dare I say, respected as a strong advocate and a fighter for the rights of others. I can't imagine how different my life would have been had I chosen not to take any risks. I won't have the pension and benefits that I would have had if I stayed in the government, but I received better benefits; a life filled with passion and the grateful appreciation of the people I have served throughout the years.

    I know my answers won't be the same as yours, but my suggestion is that you identify what you care about, what's important to you and turn it into a part of your life, whether it means taking up volunteer work, going back to school, or just finding a better job.

    If your life isn't what you want it to be, it's a big step to acknowledge that. The next step is to identify how you want to change it and who can help you get there.

    I was just as lost as you when I was your age, but when I look back I don't regret any of the changes I made in my life back then. I sincerely hope you find the same peace of mind. When you're ready you'll know what do.

  6. #6


    There's a lot of problems I see with all this wanting. You're suffering because you want so much you don't have, and even worse you've attached your self on things and accolades. You think you can't find happiness without these material possessions, i.e., a better place to live, a better job, more money.

    What will you want when you upgrade to a four room apartment? You will want a house. What will you want when you live in your house? You will want a bigger house. What will you want when you move into a bigger house? A mansion. What will you want when you get a better career? An even better career. What will you want when you buy that brand new car? Next year's model. What will you want when you make more money? You will want more money than that. People call this the hedonistic treadmill. It doesn't stop until you choose to step off, and the longer you've been on it, the harder it is to stop.

    The things you have are not going to stop the wanting. The wanting is inside of you. It is not at all connected to your possessions, or your career, or your money. The wanting only gets worse with the more you have. It doesn't stop when you get what you think you want. Right now, you have everything you need to live. Right now, you are alive, you are reading this, you are surviving. You have everything you need. You are succeeding.

    You will miss out on your life right now while you wish for a better one. Dreaming of your awesome future makes you walk blindly past all the roses you could be smelling. And attaching your view of yourself, your self-worth, to these desires, makes you feel badly inside until you get what you want. Too much attachment to material desires leads to bad things, like narcissism, paranoia, and depression. People will probably want to stop hanging around you, and that's the saddest bit, because human experiences are what bring true happiness. Experiences bring happiness, memories, and positive additions to your view of yourself. And with your friends all scared off because you're a workaholic who can't stop talking about his new Mercedes and how he's saving for an Audi, you're less likely to have these wonderfully enjoyable life experiences. You're less likely to actually find peace.

    Right now, you think I'm crazy. Of course you'll be happy with a new apartment, a new car, a new wardrobe. It's happened before. You remember that feeling so well, like Christmas morning. Well, you will be very happy, for a very short time. It is more like an effect of a drug, rather than true happiness and inner peace. Your happiness from a new car, a new house, a new career, all will fade away, faster than you think. You get used to these things. They become the normal thing. Your car will get dings, your coworkers will start to annoy you, your house's paint will chip. And from there, you want the better thing.

    So maybe you need to reevaluate what you need to be happy. If you are half-starved, it is definitely true that some more money will bring you more happiness. You will be less stressed about food and, well, survival. After about a middle-class life style, it makes no difference. Bill Gates has just as much potential for happiness as Marge Simpson. Set reasonable goals, but keep the true purpose in mind. The real purpose should be finding peace. Attempts at impressing people and attaching your value to your possessions/accomplishments are two good ways to never find peace. And right now, as John Lennon warned us, life is passing you right by while you are making other plans.

  7. #7


    Quote Originally Posted by Frogsy View Post
    "...."..."..." life is passing you right by while you are making other plans.
    This is why we pay Frogsy the big bucks lol (see the humor there?)
    Damn girl! you got this!

    Quote Originally Posted by babygohan View Post
    I feel like I should be somewhere better then where I am now."..."..." I just feel trapped in my own life with no escape.
    babygohan, I believe Frogsy has a very good point here... First thing you may your perspectives...decide to feel something better about right now...which is the only time that we truly live...

    The other fun to think about in some ways, but often times may become a set-up...for failure...

    No, don't stop having goals and aspirations...but, don't deny the viability and functionality of your life right now...especially, because of manufactured your best you, and do what you do best now...

    The crazy part of it for me seems to get what you need, and you find that is what you want...when you genuinely live without being validated by what is essentially 'poser' crap...

    You are valid and worthy now...and, I don't mean that in a smarmy-condescending-patronizing sort of self-affirming way!

    You seem to be of considerable intellect, but please don't confuse that with a balanced living...wisdom, comes in waits for Frogsy pointed have everything that you

    Figure out who's ideas your wants are...if they're not genuinely your wants...discard them...

    If you are true to yourself, you will naturally gravitate to your calling...and you have only your own life to live...

    That's all for now...

    Best of wishes to you,

  8. #8


    You are genetically programmed to be annoyed by your parents and want to get away from them. And your survival instinct will drive you to want to improve your situation. Don't worry about it, you're normal.

    Getting away from your parents is easy, just move out. But for that you need a fair paying job. And for that, you need a marketable skill. Since you're still a freshman after 5 years of collage, you either have no idea what you're good at, or you smoke too much cat nip.

    If the problem is not knowing what you are good at, then get with your collage counselor, and ask to take an aptitude test. It probably won't point you at your dream job, but it should point you at a job you can make good money at. And lets be honest here. Most people hate their job. That's life. You're probably going to hate your job too. Just accept that you'll probably hate it and move on for now. You can find a better job later, The important thing is to get started with any job now. So if your aptitude test says you'll be a good sewer worker.... well, Its a $h1tty job, But it's 1 step closer to being in a better place. And 1 step closer is better than where you are now.

    Of course, if you have some idea what you want to do already, but you haven't done anything about it yet.... and, 5 years as a freshman? ... Quit the cat nip, cold turkey. no excuses. You can smoke all you want once you get to a better place, but nothing kills a goal faster than a bong full of cat nip.


  9. #9


    Hai... eh well No, big one actually.

    No offense and with all due respect, in all honesty I say it's completely wrong to stop wanting.

    It's a natural instinct, you cannot simply block it out or give it up. We all want, we all give to get what we want. If at one point we clearly have a desire to do or have something and do not at least try it, despite the risk that we may fail, we create an delusion. And a big one, which may exist for years, or even decades, perhaps also till our point of passing away, but ultimately this will fall apart and everything we haven't done or could at least be proud of fact that we tried and gave our best - is something we will regret sooner or later. There's no way around. And the more it is that we may regret - the more it feels like our life has been in vain, besides that a lot of positive things may have a sad taste to them, since they will feel meaningless in comparison.

    Everyone has dreams, however it is a sad fact that we usually fail to act on- or to work for them. Our biggest obstacle is discouragement coming from our own minds. Unfulfilled dreams are often the cause of a life feeling empty or meaningless, while working to fulfill our dreams is often one of our greatest causes of happiness - the way is the goal.

    Secondly, not all people are the same. If you have a certain level of ambition it can drive you crazy if you don't act, or don't know how to act - since possibly you also may not know what it is you wish for. However, this is also a major bonus for being able to achieve more. Some people are meant to be more, if you want to look at it with a touch of darwinism.

    And that's all what I'm saying, gohan. It is, as mentioned already, necessary to come clear with yourself, perhaps also to change your perspective, but never give up your desire to improve yourself in any way. Anyway, you have to know what you want to do and what you don't want to do. What it's best and what not, know your strength and weakness. Which things you think are possible to achieve and things you should not "tolerate" as a given fact for your life. And anyway, it's always wrong not to change any miserable circumstances if you're able to. On the other hand, do not despair if you're not able to sometimes, though usually there is something, no matter how small it is, that you can do if you think about it.

    You're free to do what you wanna do, if you have a certain goal in life, try to reach it. As a side note, just don't place this goal in a too "material" category. Having a lot of money does not mean that you will enjoy your work. Being at peace with what you're doing is more important as having double the money. This is sadly also a very common miscalculation a lot of people make - to work your ass off somewhere, so that you're able to fulfil your dreams later. And the most important: Don't just wish for it, work for it!

    If you want to study - you're still a freshman, so what about it? That will change, perhaps you might also fail miserably, but whatever.... Heck, I know some people that went to Japan with completely useless plans, but it has been their wish to live their. One had already a job offer, luckily, but didn't know any sentence in japanese. Another one grabbed everything he had after he graduated - english major, moved there, didn't even know a single word or sign and made a living out of teaching english and some other part time jobs until he got a quite nice job offer, after his Japanese-speaking improved, for teaching students english. Sadly another one came back after nearly 2 years, was broke and will probably not go back... also due to some horrible experiences with some relationships over there. But still, she made a lot of experience she wouldn't want to miss. She was happy and enjoyed her life, since she tried.

    A famous example: Stallone... what? He was that broke and homeless, so he made a porn. Still, after that he refused to sell his movie script, since he wanted to act... mind you with an paralysis of his lower left side of the face, which is a death sentence for any kind of actor basically. I'm not saying at all that anyone should compare her/himself with him, despite having that much luck in the end... but he followed his dream.

    Just trust yourself, then you will know how to live.
    -- Goethe
    Last edited by daLira; 11-Oct-2013 at 01:00. Reason: embellishing

  10. #10


    I went thru something similar abot a year ago, and whilea lot of great advise has been mentioned so far, I'd like to add a little bit about finding a better job!

    it's not easy, but it is alot of fun! I was in a similar work situation about a year ago. I hated my job, but i had no idea what i wanted to do with my life!

    I started by talking to EVERYONE! if i knew or met someone that loved thier job,i'd ask them about it. if it sounded remotely interesting, i'd take them to lunchor for a drink and ask them evem more questions!

    Since you are currently in school, hit up the career center in your college and take the personality test. it isn't foolproof, but it will give you an idea of where to start looking fo your next career.

    don't be afraid to take that crappy job if it will lead you to what you want to do.

    and don't forget, the most important lesson you can learn is "i don't want to do this". I've had a lot of those jobs, and it helped me get a better idea of what i DO want to do

    Good luck!

    sorry about the typos, tablet is freaking out again.

Similar Threads

  1. My very own place
    By mzsquishypants in forum Diaper Talk
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 13-Mar-2013, 13:19
  2. Best place to buy a NUK 5
    By jackofwichita in forum Diaper Talk
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 29-Jan-2013, 23:34
  3. My own place
    By Fox in forum Adult Babies & Littles
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 08-Oct-2010, 12:13
  4. New to this place
    By crazybunny13 in forum Greetings / Introductions
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 20-Apr-2010, 19:53
  5. New 2 this place
    By candystripedlegsx in forum Greetings / Introductions
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 11-Jan-2009, 19:27

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  • - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community. is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.