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Thread: Bad Press, what can we do?

  1. #1

    Default Bad Press, what can we do?

    Alright, I sort of feel like I'm beating a dead horse here, but it seems to me like every time an AB or DL of some sort makes the news, it's always for something negative.

    Exhibit A: Man Who Pretended to Be Autistic to Have His Diapers Changed Sent to Jail

    Exhibit B:Man living as an 'adult baby' is cleared of Social Security fraud - Washington Times

    Could we ever catch a break? What can we do as a community to garner a better reputation? Obviously, we can't expect the general public to welcome the whole ABDL scene with open arms, but is there anything we can do to improve our image, as individuals and as a group?

  2. #2


    There's always going to be people who'll never like it and don't want to understand it at all. Anyways the best case I think is just tell people you want to know for whatever reasons and hope it goes well. Not that I'm saying you should go out and tell everyone you meet but girlfriend's, boyfriend's.

    but most of all...

  3. #3


    If we weren't so uptight and a little more open about it, then it wouldn't seem like such a rare freak thing. we don't need to have marches and go on tv, we just need to not be so afraid of other people knowing. If enough people get to know a person in real life that is a DL or an AB, then they will get to see for themselves that were not just a rare bunch of freaks. Look at how the world perceived gays 50 years ago, then look at how the world perceived gays 20 years ago, now look at how the world perceives gays today. This is directly related to the openness of gays, 50 years ago gays did not meet publicly and were not flaunting themselves(many people did not even believe homosexuality was a real thing because of how unknown it was), 20 years ago gays became alot more public and they started to act how they wanted in public, they started having marches for rights, the spread of knowledge and empowerment, today you see them everywhere you go, gay marriage is legal, its become a fad for some teenagers, people love to have a gay hairdresser, and hardly anybody cares if your gay or not, it is beginning to be seen widespread as a normal thing that people choose.

    We just have to start being less reclusive and afraid of other people knowing. I'm not saying to flaunt it or be an exhibitionist, but it doesn't need to be some big ass secret either. Im not saying that we're like gays and that one day we are gonna have to fight for rights, and get all over the news or that we need to act like babies in public. We need to raise awareness of AB and DL as separate but similarly related things, to the around the level of BDSM or lingerie. Those interested in more common fetishes usually don't make a big deal out of telling people. We don't need to be ashamed of ourselves because we like diapers for whatever reason and we shouldn't feel like telling people is such a big deal. Obviously your not gonna discuss it with everybody but you shouldn't feel like you cant tell anybody either.

  4. #4


    Honestly I think the best things to do are little, gentle hints. Basically, planting seeds of knowledge and letting them grow without our help. I've seen it done a few times in other forums or chats online. Someone starts teasing ABDLs and sometimes another person pipes in and calmly and reasonably explains that ABDLs aren't doing anything wrong and they're not as weird as the media makes them look. I can't tell if these people standing up for us are ABDL themselves or not, but it doesn't matter. All that matters is their message, and the way they present it. That is, calmly, respectfully, and gently. So if you happen to see us getting teased or mocked somewhere, especially on the internet where you get lots of visibility generally and anonymity, just go ahead and put a good word in for us, without being rude to the nay-sayers. After all, they don't realize what they're doing, they're just getting bad images from the media and so what else were they to think without better information?

    People generally like ideas the best when they think they've come up with the idea themselves. So a very gentle nudge in the right direction can be so subtle that they think they came to the conclusion themselves that ABDLs weren't all bad. And that's when you can really make a difference! Also, of course, be the example you want to see! Be yet another example of a normal, law-abiding ABDL. That's why I never want to push my fetish on people by doing things like making diapers noticeable in public (on purpose).

    I doubt we'd ever normalize ABDL or anything. It'll always be a kinky fetish or a strange lifestyle choice. I don't think we'll get true acceptance in our lifetimes. But I do think we can probably get ourselves some tolerance. And you know how the news is, they love to sensationalize stuff. They used that detail 'adult baby' to make their story worth reading. Otherwise it's just about some stranger no one cares about being sent to jail (or cleared of charges) for a reason no one cares about. The news will do what it does - so little whispers and voices in the background and planting seeds of knowledge are seriously our best bets.

  5. #5


    AB/DL is always going to be a weird freak thing. Our numbers aren't anywhere near the number of homosexuals, so very likely most people don't know an ab/dl. The only possibility would be if all fetishes and sexuality became a lot more accepted, but even in that case I think being ab/dl is always going to be met with some giggles at least because a grown person in a diaper is comical. Also I think we're kinda far off from that considering how lots of society still isn't accepting of homosexuality and the amount of shame people have about vanilla sex.

    But wait despite that there's still hope. That hope is with you, hopefully you've been projecting a reasonably sane and nice image to your friends and family. If you have and you tell them or they find out they will probably not think you're that crazy. It's easy to think someone you don't know is weird or sick or crazy or whatever when you just read about them in an article or hear about them on tv. But these people actually know you. So as long as you're not leading off your introductions with the fact that you're AB/DL then (assuming your friends and family are reasonably open-minded) it won't be the end of the world. You can always say to them "You may have read about some people with this kink who have done some inappropriate things, but I would never make someone interact with me non-consentually" or just say that if they bring something like that up.

  6. #6

  7. #7


    I know what we have is weird but if you're not breaking any laws and are a good person with morals, i don't think there is any need to change our reputation.
    Those that get into trouble are the ones who need help and for the most part we are not responsible for them.
    I like to think that i do good for others and secretly give us a good reputation, even though i don't shout from the rooftops that a DL has helped you.

  8. #8


    Just veering slightly off, but staying on topic (ish). I can't remember the last time I watched the "NEWS" and received nothing but good news. I am a Cynical B****** granted but usually no news is that good. Except perhaps those local news teams that do the o'l we're your best friends community focus angle, rubbish reporting, about some random guy that got in the Guiness Book of Records for licking stamps or something.

    Jeezz I'm cranky right now!

  9. #9


    Not much you can do really.

    Has been discussed before, but the reason I believe is that the kind of normal average guy (or girl) with a regular job and reasonable physical attractiveness that you'd need as the public face to get any good press would be completely out of their mind to put themselves out there like that.

    Personally I largely don't care what public perception is. Just saying gonna be a while before you get say a software developer who pays taxes, owns their own home, is reasonably fit, and does the ABDL thing as just one of many other things in his life telling his story to a newspaper or going on TV, and that's probably for right or wrong exactly what it would take. No one's gonna risk it, so instead you are going to get people who for various reasons already have a negative public perception (no job/on public dole, people from the porn industry, people with obvious mental issues, people engaged in criminal activity related to the fetish, whatever..) as our public face.

    Just like to re-iterate that I don't have any problem with Stanley being on welfare. I think he was out of his mind to put himself out there like that, but I don't think he was committing fraud. Nor do I have a problem with the porn industry.. you folks do great work! I'm just talking about public perception here.

  10. #10


    The best things to do are A: ignore the bad press that's already out there, and B: don't create more bad press.

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