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Thread: Dating

  1. #1

    Default Dating

    Hey everyone
    So i was just wanting your opinion on an idea ive been throwing around. Im single (not looking) but i know ill wanna start dating again in the future. Ive learned that my depression is almost non existant when I allow my little side to be out a lot more. Such as when im not at work or out with friends i pretty much act little the entire time unless I just dont feel like it that day. My question for all of you is how to go about telling someone about this when were dating. I figure when i do start dating again i would hide it from the person for maybe 3 weeks to a month before I told them. I think by then id have a pretty good idea as to how theyd react. I understand that i may have to compromise on my little time even if they are accepting of me but i dont wanna cut it back to only doing it 1 day a week blike I used too. Is it bad that I wouldnt be willing to cut back that much?

  2. #2



    I'd just act yourself...and if that is!

    I wouldn't hide it for any length of time...I'd just wait till conversation comes up the may fit the situation...then bring it up.

    Sooner or later when dating you will share more and more...that's how it works...

    Don't avoid the subject...and don't just blurt it out either...when there is an opportunity take it and say what you feel.

    If you feel like acting little helps you, they should understand else your just going to not work out together...

    I've actually never had a bad experience when dating...but we are all different...


  3. #3


    I think you're time frame for telling anyone you're dating is about right. Also, like BigBabybret says just be yourself.

    As for your Qusetion: I think an unwillingness to compromise is not always the best but if this truly helps with your mental health then dont compromise but try to leave some Wiggle room.

    I will say that i have had someone breakup over little stuff. It really is no fun and going to hurt for a while (well i hurt for a while after that). be prepared for the worst but hope for the best, always good advice. but, like you said, hopefully you will know her well enough to tell her (or him).

  4. #4

  5. #5


    Be honest to them about who and what you are. Make it known that this is a part of you, so they can accept it, or not.

    I tried dating those not into ab-dl, but it never went that well. But then i tried online dating, diaper sites, fetlife, to find my ideal match. Someone who knew what i was all about. Well.. as this guy married his dream sissy this year, id say its worked out.

    Be yourself, just look for someone who will want you to be yourself as well. Good luck.

  6. #6


    Okay, first, all of your situations are as different with who you are and your variations of ab/dlness , and your ages AND your significant other's perspectives. I will attempt to answer this in a generic form to meet all needs...choke..I see posts (questions) from those asking how to do this (I am not addressing those who have already completed the task). In today's world, obviously everyone here seems to have a slightly, if not significant sense of self-perception and how it affects others (actually and admirable trait-but it makes it hard on yourselves). I think this makes many on this forum to be very concerned with how their lifestyle/fetish will affect their relationships and a huge question of when to introduce this information. Some of you hide the information and some of you say you are "out". Regardless of which you claim to be, when your relationship reaches a certain level of intimacy, and I am not excluding this to just physical relationships, but I mean relationships which you are promising in some way a commitment of aligning your life goals with another person, you must address your ab/dlness or what ever you choose to classify yourself. Universally, regardless of what orientation you are, the statement is " you are or thinking you might be considering this relationship may become a commitment of aligning your life goals"...thus, you may make life choices in your life that are necessary to stay together whether this is professional, geographically, or family makeup/interaction/communications. Prior to this designation in a relationship, you do not owe anyone an explanation if it is not part of your interaction with the person; however, it may be easier if some aspects are already present (ie..pacifier sucking/diaper wearing/holding fuzzies). The problems lie between prospective life-mates observing and "their participating". Most people couldn't care less if you are sucking a pacifier and hugging a teddy as long as they are getting their affection (and you are polite to their friends and relatives)....Since the prevalence of male ab/dls is higher than females, the guys have to get this. No female wants to sit in 2nd to a fuzzy because a guy doesn't get how to express physical emotions. Life is a two way street even if you are an ab/dl-, kids give mommy/daddy hugs so you should expect to give it back to your significant other. Enough said as this another issue. So, when the relationship reaches this significant stage, regardless of how much you have shown, you are going to need to divulge that emotionally you require a parental relationship with someone. This can be done many ways such giving an example of how a previous relationship worked or did not. It shows that you have attempted this before. (It is almost like a job interview, some employers will be happy to learn that you tried and grew from your experience and whether it was right or wrong, it might be the right fit for their company.) If you have been divorced, this is very similar to how divorces begin conversations to find another relationship. I see a lot of shock factor on the site, chill, ease into this with some suttle representations of your needs such as wearing a diaper on an extended car trip or movie and admitting to it, or hugging your fuzzie during a stressful situation or when having a cold. Slow and steady. If you already have that "little kid" personality that they have seen getting excited at a zoo when the orangutang gave you a kiss (goofy example), and they have seen you snuggling a blanket with them watching a scary movie (that you shared), then it will not be so shocking when you have "the talk". Sorry, 3 weeks is no magic number. it depends on how much you have revealed along the way. Actually, it scares me that you would think there is some magic number of weeks. AB/DLness is only one of innumerable things to reveal. Think about a 60 year old trying to date and how much they have to reveal, it will make you feel better. Good luck, and remember your sensitivity is a gift to others, even if it may be painful for you. Just as a job applicant, focus on your positive traits.

  7. #7


    Thanks everyone for the advice, i guess i just needed the c,onfidence boost that id be doing the right thing. Ive come out to everyone of my girlfriends. One it ended up tearing us apart, another loved it but as time went on we had nothing else in common, and my most recent ex actually was the one that really helped me accept myself for who I was, I miss her a lot. But oh well, life moves on. Thanks once again everyone.

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