Purpose: Need help spotting grammatical errors and to check for clarity/word choice (I am particularly concerned with my explanation about ABDL* does not equal pedophillia) Also if anyone has any stories relating to ABDL*-phobia I would love to hear them.
Oh and no arguing about whether ABDL*-phobia exists PM me instead of clogging this thread.
And just so you know...
this is how I feel about debating right now....
SO DO NOT TURN THIS INTO A DEBATE ABOUT ARE ABDL*S DISCRIMNATED BLA BLA BLA. WE CAN AGREE TO DISAGREE.
From my website:
ABDL*-phobia is the spectrum of negative attitudes and feelings towards ABDL*s. ABDL-phobia can be manifested as: aversion, stigmas, negative attitudes, contempt, hatred, or violence. ABDL*-phobia stems from misconceptions and stereotypes.
Common Misconceptions about ABDL*s:
1. ABDL Is The Result Of Poor Parenting/Abuse:
•Although a lot of ABDL people have reported less than ideal childhoods, it is not the norm. The sad truth is that child abuse is an all too common occurrence across all demographics. There is no relationship between parenting and having ABDL* children.
2. ABDL Is A Mental Illness:
•Fetishism is mentioned briefly in the Diagnostic Statistical Manual, but ABDL*s were not mentioned. So technically those who consider ABDL anything other than a fetish do not fall under the auspices of the definition found in the DSM anyway. Furtheremore, for a fetish to be a mental illness, individuals would have to experience distress or disability as a result of the fetish. This is simply not the case for ABDL*s.
•ABDLs are typically well-adjusted successful individuals. Our unique behavior is so benign that most people have never even heard of us. We just tend to pass right under everyone’s radar.
3. We Want Anything To Do With Children:
•People sometimes assume that having a fetish for an infantile object equates to liking children. This is untrue... Adult babies want to be children, not to attack them. Actually many ABDL*s are more likely to be protective of children than the average person. We identify as children or childlike people ourselves so preying on children would be akin to preying on ourselves.
•Diaper lovers, especially those who gain sexual satisfaction from diapers, can be sometimes pegged as pedophiles. The entire point of diapers being sexy is the thought of an adult being "naughty" by wearing a diaper or just diapers by themselves as an independent object. Another problem with the misconception of ABDL*s being after children is that diapers are not exclusively for babies. In truth, almost as many adult diapers are worn as baby diapers. Actually sales of adult diapers in Japan have topped those intended for children as of 2012. As an adult who has to wear ADULT DIAPERS for a medical reason, I find it extremely insulting for someone to associate diapers only with children. Having a medical issue and wearing diapers does not make me any less of a man! Our society really needs to stop stigmatizing diapers, they are fact of life for certain people young and old. Having a fetish for diapers is just like having a fetish for anything else (feet, balloons, socks,...). It is just being sexually aroused by an inanimate object a not a person. That is the entire point of it being called a fetish in the first place. If DLs were interested in children then it wouldn't even be considered a fetish...
4. ABDLs are just a bunch of dysfunctional freaks who need to grow up....
•ABDLs come from all walks of life. We are just like you. The majority of the community is very closeted. Chances are we could be your lawyer, doctor, gardener, whatever… We are productive members of society who are not hurting anyone. Being ABDL does nothing to diminish an individual's ability function in society or the workplace. This misconception is a thin veil made of ignorance used to hide hatred.
Common Types of ABDL*-phobia:
Hate Speech: By far the most common abuse suffered by ABDL*s. ABDL*s are sometimes called names or threatened. Popular insults thrown at ABDL+ individuals perverts, pedophiles, insane, ect.
Cyber-bullying: Most ABDL*s are closeted and only share their ABDL* on the internet. Most ABDL*s are able to sufficiently mask their personal identities while online, however there have been numerous instances of individuals who have been harassed and even outed by bullies on the internet. Online ABDL* communities are often plagued by "trolls", people who participate in online discussions with the intent of angering or abusing others through insulting or explosive derrogatory comments. Seeing as most ABDL*-phobia is perpetrated by cowards, the internet provides the perfect mask of anonymity for bullies.
Child Abuse: The term "Adult Baby" is a misnomer. Many ABDL*s have self-identified as ABDL* in their child and teen years. Most have had ABDL* impact their childhood in some way. Almost all ABDL*s have had the fact that they are ABDL* thrown in their face by their parents at least once. A few parents have used threats and physical violence to deter ABDL* behavior. In an abusive household, being ABDL* is a liability for the abused individual, just one more weak spot for an abuser to target.
Infighting/ Internalized ABDL*-phobia:
Surprisingly, a great deal of ABDL*-phobia actually has its origins within the ABDL* community itself. ABDL* is a spectrum that encompasses a wide variety of people. Historicallly the ABDL community was a fetish community, its origins traced back to the popularization of latex pornography of the 70s. Later, less sexual/non-sexual ABDL*s came into the scene. The rift between these two groups of ABDL*s has lead to infighting amongst the ABDL* community.
Homophobia: Homophobic people may accidentally confuse ABDL*s with members of the LGTBQ community.
As a result ABDL*s are victims of all the typical attacks aimed at the LGTBQ community. While all ABDL individuals are not necessarily LGTBQ, many ABDLs do identify as LGTBQ in addition to being ABDL*. Non-gender conforming ABDL*s face many of the same negative reactions as the transgender community. Some people can't seem to handle the idea of a biological male running around in a dress and carrying around their dolly.
Violence: just like any other minority, ABDL* people are victims of violence. Those ABDLs who are "out" can be targeted for dressing or acting differently. There have been very few "out" ABDLs (as of 2013), some have been assaulted for walking down the street with their teddy bear. So few ABDLs are out that it is difficult to gauge the scale of violence towards ABDL*s currently. In the future this may become a larger issue. As a general rule of thumb: if it is not safe for a person to be gender non-conforming in a particular place or situation, then it is not safe to be an openly ABDL* person.
Employment: Damaging one's prospects for employment is probably the number one reason cited for deciding not to come out of the closet as an ABDL*. ABDL*s have had their employment terminated for being ABDL*. It is not safe for out of the closet ABDL* people to pursue certain career paths, especially those that involve contact with children. Additionally, some ABDL* individuals who are also incontinent have faced difficulty over wearing diapers at the jobs. Even though these individuals have a legitimate medical they may mocked or ostracized for wearing diapers. Those who are wrongfully terminated may not exercise their rights because they fear being outed as ABDL*s.
Property Destruction: Most ABDL-phobia is underhand and cowardly. The typical ABDL-phobe will not physically attack an ABDL or even do anything "to their face", phobes often try to harm an ABDL when the individual's back is turned. An example would be taking an ABDL*s teddy bear and throwing it in the garbage while no ones looking or "keying" their car. Abusive parents have been known to gather their children's stuffed animals and throw them in bonfires.
Extortion: Closeted ABDL* people are sometimes at risk of being by their fear of being outed. Most ABDL* gatherings have a specific guidelines for privacy, however sensitive information such as names and photos can be stolen under rare circumstances. This information can then be used to blackmail individuals.