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Thread: An Intriguing Quandary

  1. #1

    Question An Intriguing Quandary

    Well hello folks. Pleasure to be poking at you guys again!

    I've got a bit of an interesting problem that I just feel like opening myself up to talking to other people about.

    I've got this urge lately, this really annoying urge, I feel, to have someone else watch over me for a day, or if not a day, more than that, a weekend. I've reached the point where sure, I can have little-time by myself (Living on your own is fun that way,) but I've got this strange, strange urge to want to be babysat by someone older than me. I know in reality, this is quite difficult to have happen!

    However, I'm really picky. Like really picky as well.

    How can I control these urges so they don't end up controlling me/influencing my social interactions with older DLs/ABs?

    Sorry for being so scatterbrained, but I felt I had to get this off my chest!

    Thank you, guys!

  2. #2


    It's not such an uncommon desire as I'm coming to learn. I think if you can find someone who is either into it already or open to a bit of weirdness, you can broach the topic when you know them sufficiently. I know some people put themselves out there as a caregiver to all comers but unless you're doing it as a job that seems a little strange to me. It's not surprising to want a caregiver in the abstract but in practice, it's anything but abstract. Get to know people and go from there.

  3. #3


    I think a lot of us ab's would really like to be babysat, so what you are feeling is probably common, but possibly more intense. For me it is mostly the want to find a permanent partner who would enjoy doing a bit of babysitting sometimes.

    from my perspective, i don't think there is a lot that can be done to fulfill that need until you meet the right person, but I don't think i would go out of my way to find a mommy or daddy who specifically want to be that only in your life, a lot of those people can sometimes be a bit creepy. That might not be true though, but from the people that i have talked to that like to take that role and go looking for ab's to take care of, they seem odd to me. Id suggest just trying to find a quality partner in life who is open to being a part of your little side, that is at least my goal. However, if you did luck out in finding a quality person who is also a mommy/daddy/caretaker, then kudos to you. Meanwhile, maybe finding friends who wouldn't be bothered by your little side, and just talking to them about it might help. I know that disclosure about ab lifestyle is not encouraged much on here except in certain circumstances, but for me, I have been open about it to more and more close friends and people in my life, and i am learning who the right people are to talk to about it, and it is helping me feel a little less alone, and hopeful in finding a partner who will want to be a part of my little side.

  4. #4


    Try local munches and see if anyone sparks your interest, that would be a start: perhaps somebody's so of whichever is not your preferred sex? At least you will know the concept is not foreign to them and they may feel comfortable eventually having you over or to your place...

    this just in:

  5. #5


    Have you thought about adult daycare? Spendy......but you don't have to worry about coming across someone creepy or trust issues.

  6. #6


    Never been to a munch myself. In fact, in 20 years, I've never even met another AB/DL in the flesh.

    I'm considering the DC munch this weekend, but I'm curious about the age dynamics. I'd rather not be that creepy, token 35+ year old codger surrounded by 18-24 year old whippersnappers snickering at my receding hairline.

    Any older folks care to comment on the demographics they've seen at the average munch? I know most of us are kids at heart, but I'd be more comfortable breaking the ice with folks closer to my age bracket.

    A 15+-year age gap is hardly insurmountable obviously, but it can make for somewhat awkward conversation -- particularly amidst a group of strangers.

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