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Thread: * coming out * lgbt

  1. #1

    Default * coming out * lgbt

    I think I should start with a little backstory...I am male early 20's and coming to the realization I might be making some more permanent changes so I can live my life more "free" and happy. I think we spend so much time as individuals trying to "figure" ourselves out, and to some that means placing labels on ourselves. Personally I have always felt more feminine and associated better with females. I would consider myself gender fluid but does it make sense to classify myself as a lesbian since I am ONLY solely attracted to females? There isn't anything that turns me on about guys but with the right partner I could see "checking guys out" together as something fun...

    Feeling more feminine is amplified when I am in "little space" but I am having a hard time separating my overbearing feminine side against my floundering masculinity. I am not sure if this even makes sense to people but it is me coming out and coming to terms with who I really am.

  2. #2


    The first step in coming to terms with all of this is letting go of the titles you are trying to put on yourself. From one genderfluid person to another, dont try to determine your sexual preference in correlation with your gender identity because it will only confuse you... I'm gender fluid and I am sexually attracted to women but I could fall in love with a boy as I have in the past, and with that would indefinitely follow sexual relations, while im not attracted to the male body by default, the attraction can still grow but that doesn't mean im a straight girl or a gay guy, or a lesbian or any of that, you just have to step away from the titles and say to yourself "i am a boy and a girl and i like girls".

    I have felt the exact same way you have in your first paragraph and am going through exactly what you're going through in your second paragraph. My female persona is more prominent when im little as well, but who's to say that your little is only strictly female? while your adult self can slide between the two... this is all very possible and something you should consider, because it wasnt until i started dressing like an LG that i realized how much more satisfied I am with myself, and im willing to admit and accept that my little self is strictly an LG and not a little boy, but there is nothing wrong with this >_>

    Its funny because reading this reminds me of how I was feeling just a few months ago. Honestly its all about just saying to yourself what you think you are regardless of how undocumented or how "outrageous" it might sound and if you feel like your result might be the most unique and outrageous result you've ever encountered, then LET it be because its what makes you the wonderful person you are.

    Honestly, i dont know whether or not i can be in a stable relationship with a boy i fall in love with, (im married btw so that seems like a dead argument lol but regardless) and i dont know what to call myself other than pansexual because it seems to be the closest title i can think of, but I honestly only have that so that people around me who have a necessity for titles wont ask ridiculous questions like "are you gay or bi?" they can just see pansexual, look it up, and be done with it. Honestly i find myself having to explain my gender fluidity more often than my sexual orientation, but conclusively, just be yourself and enjoy it.

  3. #3


    We are all ourselves, within our own minds. Labels were originally invented to help communication between people, but too many see labels as who and what we are. Be yourself, and accept yourself as you are. If others cannot handle it, that is their problem.

  4. #4


    I think that this is a way to express a part of yourself you have an issue with in an area that you feel safe. This allows you to act out these feelings without breaching your comfort zone. I personally wouldn't consider this your way of coming to terms with it due to the fact that it only occurs, in comfort, in your safe zone it would seem.

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