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Thread: teddybear in public issues

  1. #1

    Default teddybear in public issues

    Sorry for how long it is.

    Hey everyone my mom bought me shellie may a Disney bear from Japan. I was crazy happy. The "Thing" to do with her is like flat Stanley you take her or the boy bear Duffy and take pictures of them doing human stuff.There is a whole website of just pics of people with their bears posing them in public.Most people carry their bears in bags or hold them.Mind you these are "normal" adults.ive been trying to let my little side out more in public.i go to the mall once a week with "normal"friends.i like to bring shellie may along and hold her while she is dressed up and take some pics.They think i'm nuts weird and a giant kid in a bad way.On Wednesday I dressed me and shellie up in matching outfits and took pics and my friends really thought i hit the deep end.My friends are starting to say they wont hangout with me if i bring her.Today my mom sat me down and explained that people think im a kook and weirdo when I bring a stuffed teddy around because i'm 21 and I need to stop bringing her in public.she threatened to let my dad cut her up.My dad was embarrassed when I took her everywhere with me on a Disney cruise. I don't know what to do and I have no little friends who would understand.Attachment 17124
    pic attached of recent outing

  2. #2

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    I'm no AB - and don't have any tendencies towards this - so take the following as "biased" at best.

    I'm IC and secondary a DL - so yes, I like diapers - something that in the general public is considered "taboo"...
    And I'm a VERY private person, I like this part - both my IC and even more my DL side - to stay exactly that: private.

    Just saying - so keep this "background info" in mind with my following reply...

    A couple of things:
    when you interact with other humans - like your family, close friends etc - there needs to be some sort of MUTUAL respect - respect for each other, for their boundaries, for their & your comfort etc..
    The situation at hand is that bringing your teddy as a 21yr. old adult along everywhere obviously makes your parents uncomfortable.
    At 21 you're of legal age everywhere on this planet - thus you are of course your own master - and no one is REALLY able to hinder you to bring that plushie out along.
    And you LIKE to do this - fair enough...

    Your friends start to avoid you - this is usually a good sign that you probably go over the top with something.

    But I believe you need to carefully weigh your options here:
    1) keep bringing the teddy everywhere and as a result maybe estrange your family & friends for good - because you put them in a "compromising" situation, you expose something to them which they are not comfortable having in public. Also maybe get weird reactions from friends, strangers, etc...
    2) keep bringing the teddy along - on SELECT occasions that DO NOT involve your family, friends... act out on your desires - but with some common-sense restraint
    3) stop it altogether: you'd probably make mom & dad "happy" - but you probably make yourself unhappy...

    To me option No. 2 looks the best.

  3. #3

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    I don't actually have friends, but If I did, They would have to accept me for who I am. If they can't then they don't deserve my friendship.
    As for family, You should sit down and talk with them and make some sort of agreement when its OK with them to have the teddy bear.

  4. #4

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    i negoiated for disney trips.she threatened to have me tested and i said go ahead i can bs my way out.im really thinking of not hanging with my friends its a teadybear for god sakes im not sucking on a paci. they call me weird already for being into bdsm so to them this is the icing on the cake.

  5. #5

    Default

    I think you've taken your teddy bear on one too many journeys. In my humble opinion, it's time to stop. Your friends have asked you to stop, as have your parents. What more do you want? I love my teddy bear, and I sleep with him every night. I tend to personify my plushies, so I do know where you're coming from, but if you can't separate these quirks which we share between home and "out", then perhaps you do need some outside help.

    My big teddy bear wears a real toddler's onsie, so when we have company, he hides either in a closet, or in another bedroom with the door closed. He doesn't especially like this, but he cares about me and wants others to perceive me as mentally healthy. He watches out for me, and I watch out for him. So I go out with my wife and friends, and he stays home and watches television. He likes television and he's okay with that.

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by MickeyM View Post
    I don't actually have friends, but If I did, They would have to accept me for who I am. If they can't then they don't deserve my friendship.
    As for family, You should sit down and talk with them and make some sort of agreement when its OK with them to have the teddy bear.
    This kind of makes me "angry"... I here this kind of notion a LOT on here...

    it's TWO things apart: accepting who you are - and being comfortable around you when you do "exotic" stuff.
    Someone can ACCEPT you - but doesn't necessarily need to be fine with stuff you do around them.

    The key is RESPECT - it goes BOTH WAYS. if you want ACCEPTANCE you need to be RESPECTFUL.
    it's actually quite simple... there's no harm in talking to good friends and letting them in on a specific side of yours IF THERE's any "need"..
    But flaunting your AB (or whatever) Side is often taking it too far.

    Example: one of my friends has got a huge dildo collection - exhibited right there in the living room.
    (yes he's flamboyantly gay... to the point where many of his gay friends are telling him that he's gone completely overboard)....
    I've known him for a long time and it's gotten more and more "extreme" - you can't go anywhere with him without having his "gayness" the penultimate object and subject of any conversation... it's annoying to be frank. I have no issue with him being gay - not at all, don't really care - but it's his "aggressive" display, act, etc. that gets on my nerves. and it's a lot harder to ACCEPT him this way and especially inviting him over to a party...
    see - that's the thing - it's not that I (or any of his other friends) doesn't ACCEPT him for being gay - it's the way it's flaunted and pushed that makes most a tad uncomfy.

    Same goes for any other thing - be this lifestyle, kink, etc... moderation is key if you want acceptance.

  7. #7

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    What is your opinion on the non little or baby full grown adults who take their teddies out as well and do exactly what im doing.

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by skittlesfirehawk View Post
    Sorry for how long it is.

    Hey everyone my mom bought me shellie may a Disney bear from Japan. I was crazy happy. The "Thing" to do with her is like flat Stanley you take her or the boy bear Duffy and take pictures of them doing human stuff.There is a whole website of just pics of people with their bears posing them in public.Most people carry their bears in bags or hold them.Mind you these are "normal" adults.ive been trying to let my little side out more in public.i go to the mall once a week with "normal"friends.i like to bring shellie may along and hold her while she is dressed up and take some pics.They think i'm nuts weird and a giant kid in a bad way.On Wednesday I dressed me and shellie up in matching outfits and took pics and my friends really thought i hit the deep end.My friends are starting to say they wont hangout with me if i bring her.Today my mom sat me down and explained that people think im a kook and weirdo when I bring a stuffed teddy around because i'm 21 and I need to stop bringing her in public.she threatened to let my dad cut her up.My dad was embarrassed when I took her everywhere with me on a Disney cruise. I don't know what to do and I have no little friends who would understand.Attachment 17124
    pic attached of recent outing
    I see nothing wrong with you doing this and i am entitled to my own opinion so is everyone else on here my view on it is this you are not walking around everywhere holding a gun in everyones so i don't see the big deal here if it makes you happy good for you screw everyone else listen to me you come into this world with your name and you die in this world with your name do what makes you happy dont do what others want you to do unless it is your boss at work then do what he or she says lol but get my point and fyi this is why i have very few friends

  9. #9

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    Honestly its like carrying around any other object you were attached to everywhere you go, it doesn't really matter what it is, it's just kind of strange. Most parents of 3 year olds probably wouldn't want them to bring their teddy to every place they go either (as in walking around with it in public). There is some cultural bias here that is making it less acceptable, and I guess that should be taken into account.

    My Suggestion:
    Stop carrying around your teddy (it can get dirty, damaged, and you don't want to lose friends over it)
    Get one of those plush backpacks. I know they have ones for pokemon, mlp, hello kitty and they sell them at specncers and hot topic. They probably sell teddy ones too.

    And yes if I saw someone doing this in public I would think it was odd and although I'd still be friends with someone like that.... it's still strange.

  10. #10

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    discussing this with your parents is just contra productive; parents seem to be progammed to freak out when their children show any sign of not growing up.
    I have no problem shifting from my toddler personality to the personality who pays the bills and so on, but I cannot demand that my parents change their views as easy as I do. in fact I have a really hard time getting my mom to treat me with the same respect she treats others my age. dont get me wrong, my mother loves me but she just steps right over me sometimes, treating me like I was a minor. I'm sure that I have myself to "blame" for this to some extent, in not keeping my inner thoughts to myself. I learnt the hard way that some things are just not meant to be shared with everybody.

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