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Thread: Metrosexual friends?

  1. #1

    Default Metrosexual friends?

    Haven't started a new thread in awhile, but here is an idea that I've been thinking about, and don't really see any similar threads.

    I am gay, yet oddly find myself wishing I had a group of "straight" guy friends, who are more of the "metrosexual" type and also into diaper wearing. You see the problem with having other gay guy friends and "diapers" is that the sexual tension part of it really gets in the way. I find myself wanting to have guy-friends who are into diapers, for much the same reason I would also like to have girl-friends into diapers - so that we can enjoy our company together, and the joy of being diapered and kid-like, without the sexual tension.

    Does this make sense to anyone? Or am I just rambling.

  2. #2

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    You want a cute guy to chill with, without any sense of sexual attraction or obligation? Sounds fine to me.

    Though oddly I struggle to encounter straight guys into this fetish. They seem less open, more closeted about it. They need a parade or something...

  3. #3

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    Theres a lot of straight guys that are into this, I would know because I am one of them, you just have to look harder than normal.

  4. #4

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    Of the 1000+ people who answered BitterGrey's survey of the AB/DL community in 2006-2008, 85% were male and 58% were exclusively heterosexual. So clearly there are plenty of straight male AB/DLs out there.

    You have to look in the right places, though. There aren't a lot of straight men on websites that cater primarily to gay men. That doesn't mean that they're in the closet about their AB/DL-hood. It means that they're going elsewhere.

    It may be tricky approaching straight men about hanging out in an all-male context. It will be important to make your non-sexual intentions clear.

    You may have better luck looking for opportunities to hang out with others in a mixed-gender context. If you live near a major city (and perhaps even if you don't), there may be an ageplay munch or a littles munch in your area. The two ageplay munches I've been attended were both mixed-gender and primarily straight, but very friendly to gay and bisexual people. Munches are social events, not dating events, so there usually isn't a problem with sexual tension.

    p.s. I thought "metrosexual" refers specifically to straight men who pay a lot of attention to their appearance. Are you looking specifically for that sort of straight men, or are you just looking for straight men who are gay-friendly?

  5. #5

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    I'm straight, but not at all metrosexual according to wiki


    Being with others without sexual tension depends on your outlook less than their gender. Obviously YOU feel no such tension with girls... Perhaps if guys are sufficiently different from what attracts you you might find them OK? Perhaps out of your age group? I have an automatic non-attraction to people I perceive as taken, off the market... so maybe you could hang with dudes when they have their bf around?

    I am not ab or babyfur but I do hang with littles, we're all padded people... I don't feel sexual tension happening. Including towards the females (and there are several I see regularly.)

    I understand if you are hanging at gay bars: that's where the fetish crowd gathers when they gather, whatever their preference for partners may be. Where I am, we had several mens' gay clubs which were a mixed crowd some nights, strictly gay other nights, and you were supposed to know which was which.

    You could try going to lesbian bars, there would be no sexual tension... perhaps if you met littles there the atmosphere of the place would dampen any feelings of sexual tension? I never got any grief for being male at such places.

    Fetlife is the site du jour (currently trendy) for getting into groups who meet live for fun and friendship, non-sexual play. There are plenty of such for all the many flavors of diaper wearers and even non-padded littles. (They rp or fantasize being young but out of diapers. )
    Last edited by Raccoon; 22-Apr-2013 at 17:41.

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by buridan View Post
    p.s. I thought "metrosexual" refers specifically to straight men who pay a lot of attention to their appearance. Are you looking specifically for that sort of straight men, or are you just looking for straight men who are gay-friendly?
    This was my question, since I'm more of the opposite. I don't care much for my appearance, with some stipulations. I don't let myself go too unshaven, and I shower daily, and I change my clothes each day, so I make an effort I guess, but in the end it's not even on my radar of importance. It's just common decency, and I can't stand being unclean. I wouldn't self-identify as metrosexual.

    Well, as a straight male diaper lover, it comes down to the following; would we be meeting up for the sole purpose of discussing diapers or the like? In real life I'm very reserved about this aspect of me. As far as I know, nobody is aware it's a part of me, though I might have let one or two things slip in the past, it probably wasn't enough to let people make the connections, and they've certainly never approached me. So, if I were to meet up with others, I'd probably have to use another pretext to justify it. Maybe we're getting together for some gaming or something? I think that's what it comes down to, at least for me. Can I be friends with a person in more than just one situation? Could I talk about something completely unrelated to what I met them through, and still have fun?

  7. #7

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    OOOOOOhhh great point Fifad. Get together with a focus on something other than talking about pacis, diapers and stuff that might remind you to be turned on. LAN gaming is a very good idea. Go carting? Roller skating?

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    OOOOOOhhh great point Fifad. Get together with a focus on something other than talking about pacis, diapers and stuff that might remind you to be turned on. LAN gaming is a very good idea. Go carting? Roller skating?
    Heh, thanks. Even with more 'normal' interests, it's a good idea to try to diversify your interests, otherwise relationships get stale pretty quickly.

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by MyWorld08 View Post
    Haven't started a new thread in awhile, but here is an idea that I've been thinking about, and don't really see any similar threads.

    I am gay, yet oddly find myself wishing I had a group of "straight" guy friends, who are more of the "metrosexual" type and also into diaper wearing. You see the problem with having other gay guy friends and "diapers" is that the sexual tension part of it really gets in the way. I find myself wanting to have guy-friends who are into diapers, for much the same reason I would also like to have girl-friends into diapers - so that we can enjoy our company together, and the joy of being diapered and kid-like, without the sexual tension.

    Does this make sense to anyone? Or am I just rambling.

    Hi MyWorld08. I am more of a good ol boy red neck type, but I am always looking for someone to have a nice intilectual discussion with and not be judged for my bad typing or spelling. After all that is what the group is about. I have never thought about real time get togethers, but have no problem talking to a person no matter what their "Views" are.

    however if you are talking about meeting some one the best of luck.

  10. #10

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    Wow, thanks everyone. These are some great responses.

    Oateson - yes, that's partly it. I would want to be around people who care about their clothes and appearance, not in a totally superficial way, but who are straight, to avoid sexual obligation.

    Buridan - you are correct about the term "metrosexual". But I am thinking of a combination of what you describe and someone who is completely at ease around gay people. In short, someone who is secure enough in their heterosexuality, to not freak out about changing another guy's diaper, or telling stories, giving bottles, and being affectionate in a child-like way.

    Fidad - yes, getting together for the sole purpose of wearing diapers and changing each other would be incredibly boring and would not form the basis of a lasting friendship. I can think of a number of fun, kid-themed interests my "friends" could do together. For example, as an adult I don't really care much to celebrate my birthday with a party. But, I think it would be a blast to have a kid-themed birthday party in which my presents were toys. Also, I happen to love Star Wars, so I could imagine having a Lego building party where we build Lego Star Wars ships, then played with them. Of course we would all be in diapers while doing these activities.

    Racoon - those are all great ideas. How about a pool party in which we played games and all wore swim diapers. Something like that.

    I just find that doing stuff like that with other gay guys, would tend to lead to sexual expectations at some point, I just don't want to deal with that in this situation.

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