Well I have been working on getting my pee to just happen. I have wanted it to be that when driving, walking, or just sitting at my desk that the flow would not be something that I had to concentrate on making happen, for it to just be a total natural action.
I found early on that standing and talking to someone and peeing at the same time was quite easy. However the driving, walking, or just sitting was not as easy. It was as if my body or mind was saying no no no.
I took the following action. I wear two diapers to work - the first is a tena overnight diaper with two tena overnight pads inside it. Both the diaper and the pads are slit repeatedly so that the flow will go from one to the other. Then I put on a depends (protection three tab diaper) over that (it still has plastic outer layer). Finally I put on a pair of plastic pants over all that. I found that with all that I felt more secure in not leaking. However that was still not enough.
The big thing I found was a total change in mental thought. I now feel so what if you leak, so what if you have to change your slacks. I keep a change of slacks at work. The other mental change was to never go to the bathroom to pee. I do not poop in my diapers (yes have done so but its so messy).
With the combination of lots of protection and taking on a mental attitude of so what you peed your pants - you wear diapers - it happens, that now I often do not even notice that i am peeing until the flow gets heavy.
The other thing that has added to this change has been to always wear overnight pads to bed. I am now even waking up with the pad somewhat wet, not soaked but not dry either.
The next step in my process is going to be when I finally wake up and find I have peed the bed and did not even know. Or to be out and not wearing diapers or pads and have the suprise of finding that I have just peed myself.
The question is does it really happen that from doing my training that it is going to happen - I will wet the bed - I will have an accident when not wearing? Or is it that this is a myth and the body and mind does not change that much?