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Thread: Ironically LMAO

  1. #1

    Default Ironically LMAO

    Hi! I've been around for two months and I've been commenting on a few posts here and there. Thanks to all of you I have a better understanding of who I am (dl) and I have learned so much about ab/dl and furries. I had no idea such a large support community existed! So now I find myself about to be thrust in the limelight as I share a story with you.

    Our 15 yr old son sees a psychiatrist for Asperger's (anyone here have that?). Today he had a private conversation with him. When pressed for details, he told my wife what was bothering him. When they got home, he was a little hesitant to tell me what had transpired. Finally my wife says, "He likes stuffed animals." "No, mom. I am a furry! Do you know what a furry is dad?"

    I said, "Yes, I stumbled across the definition recently." (lmao inside).

    He was so upset about coming out. He said he has known since he was 10. Is that too young to know? My wife told him, "It's OK. As long as you enjoy doing it and as long as you aren't hurting anyone." Yay mom!!!

    I asked him if he wanted to wear diapers and he said no, those are baby furries and he's not one of them. (Well educated! He also mentioned ab/dl - someone has been on the internet!)

    In trying to find out info on furries, he confessed he stumbled across a porn site.

    He was talking to some friends one day and almost came out when one of them said something negative about furries (damn high schoolers!).

    My wife asked how I knew what a furry was. I said I saw one on that show Law and Order or CSI or something like that where one got murdered at a convention. She asked, "So you searched on the internet for the definition?"

    I said yes, I was curious after seeing the show. "That show was years ago!"

    "Well, I uh remembered it one night."

    So anyway, amongst my rambling, there were a couple of questions above. My other one is when do you know if it's safe to come out to a friend when you're his age, or do you? I told him to not tell anyone for awhile as high schoolers can be cruel.

    This may turn into a blog. Without further ado, let the posts begin:

  2. #2

    Default

    Furry is a hobby and is nothing that needs to be "come out" about. Furry is not a sexuality. He can tell who he wants, yes high school can be cruel, but trust me when I say no one is going to care unless he is running around school always talking about it or wearing ears and a tail all the time around people. That does not mean people won't give him crap for it, because most people don't understand what a furry is.

    Perhaps you could go over ways your son could explain to others what furry is when he is asked? It might make it easier on him, because when you are on the spot, answers usually don't come easy.

    EDIT: I wish I could find it, but there is a rage comic where this kid is talking to his dad, telling his dad he is a furry, dad turns to son and says "me too"

  3. #3

    Default

    When did being a furry stop meaning that you belong to a little group, and started becoming a lifestyle?

    But he does seem rather educated on the subject, and your wife seems to have a very open mind about things.

  4. #4

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by FauxPas View Post
    Furry is a hobby and is nothing that needs to be "come out" about. Furry is not a sexuality. He can tell who he wants, yes high school can be cruel, but trust me when I say no one is going to care unless he is running around school always talking about it or wearing ears and a tail all the time around people. That does not mean people won't give him crap for it, because most people don't understand what a furry is.

    Perhaps you could go over ways your son could explain to others what furry is when he is asked? It might make it easier on him, because when you are on the spot, answers usually don't come easy.
    I disagree. As long as you are okay and supportive to your son that should suffice. If he really wants to tell someone, it should only be a very close friend or a girlfriend. It's not about whether he will be judged or not, just that kids that age are pretty much a mood swing waiting to happen, and if there was any negative feedback from someone he told, it could be a huge disappointment.

    Simply tell him that you want him to be who he wants to be and nothing less and that he has your support. It becomes much easier with age, and he will for sure find people he could share this part of himself with. People from his school aren't who he should start with though. I remember telling a really vanilla friend of mine about things that I thought about in terms of slightly fetishy and weird stuff and her reaction (I was 14) made me feel like a total freak for not fitting in with the status quo. She was usually a really understanding friend too.

    Just my $0.02

  5. #5

    Default

    That's the problem with Asperger's Syndrome - you hyper focus on a subject and don't let go. I would worry about him telling several students about being a furry and, since he is already a loner, would worry about him becoming more of an outcast. Having said that, I will tell him what you suggested and have him educate people should it ever come up. We bought him a skunk outfit for Halloween and he has worn the hat at other times when it was colder. So he has run around with the ears part a few times. Most people probably thought he was just his weird old self.

    - - - Updated - - -

  6. #6

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    That's pretty awesome how you guys handled that. When my parents found out about me being a furry, they kinda freaked out. Mom wanted me to see a psychiatrist for it and I flat out refused. Our relationship has been a bit tense since, we still get along, but she now tries to get into my personal business. You guys are awesome for being able to accept him and even ask him more questions about how he feels abou it. I find it a bit strange you went straight to diapers, but hey, it's not me. It must be nice to know he feels comfortable enough to come to you with something that can be embarrassing like that without fear.

  7. #7

    Default

    His psych suggested a therapist. We are changing psychs anyway for a more extensive therapy.

  8. #8

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    Meh; I mean, he's part of the Furry fandom. Nothing really to 'come out' about, but if he did, more power to him. Like your wife said, if he enjoys it and isn't hurting anyone, including himself, then that's chill. Hey, maybe take him to a convention or something? I dunno where you live, but, there're plenty of FurCons around the USA and Western Europe! :P

  9. #9

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    Thanks guys. I knew I could count on you! OK. "Coming out was a bad choice of words. How about "confessed"? There are no furcons in our city. There are some in a neighboring state, but that would require a major trip ($$) for us. Maybe when he's older.

  10. #10
    professorbock

    Default

    Hi, zipperless. I appreciate you taking the time to share this story with us. This story is actually heartwarming, and a nice break from all the humdrum of commonly discussed rejection tales.

    As for your son, it's good he's honest and open about what he likes. I find that to be a sign of improved health, not only for his peace of mind, but for the family as a whole. So, kuddos!

    If he's a furry, and likes the idea of role-playing an anthropomorphic manifestation of an animal-like character, whether through masks, costumes or full-on mascot suits, then that's great.

    But something tells me that the boy's father, you, are also a strong and unique character. Consider that a blessing.

    I mean, in a sense the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree, huh?

    I am sure your son will be OK. Other young folks his age can be crude and belittling, but after 4 years in high school, nobody really gives a damn whether your jeans cost $20 or $120. The real world dissolves bullies. Do what I did and tell your son he shouldn't give the time of day to morons in school who can't offer any positivity.

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