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Thread: Is there room for adulthood in your life?

  1. #1

    Default Is there room for adulthood in your life?

    I don't mean that in a nasty/disrespectful way or anything; watching that 'Two' documentary got me thinking...

    Is there room for adulthood in an AB/DL way of life? And I don't mean just out of necessity. Of course we all have to do the adult existence to survive... But I was interested that the guy in 'Two' said he played at being adult but he was still 2 underneath it all. It was interesting that he seemed to struggle to keep a tidy house; I don't wanna over-read that but it certainly felt like he didn't really hold a strong adult perspective on his world.

    Myself, I feel like I'm striking a good balance now I don't binge/purge and I have an accepting partner. I had a hell of a time figuring it out in my teens and my early 20s. I still love being an adult and doing adult things... For me, the other side of the coin is a release from that; a means to express the bliss of life without toil and responsibility.

    What, if you don't mind me asking, are your experiences folks?

  2. #2


    I have a very difficult time keeping things tidy though I actually want everything to be organized. I have taken some steps to correct that. On a larger overall level I enjoy being able to make choices for myself but I have bouts of being indecisive like any average person. All the time growing up I wanted to reach milestones of independence, while at the same time "I never asked to be born" and began getting worse depression after reaching 18. A lot of my messed-up life is due to my neurological condition with its main manifestation of failure to read and understand nonverbal cues, resulting in me only having ever had 2 GFs. Because of that same disorder my family has de facto treated me as though I was a little, but when they do it, I rebel against it. I suppose all I ever wanted was a new mommy all my life, but in the spirit of giving an appropriate response I 'locked out' the urges to regress until very recently, even though I knew there was such a thing as this shortly after 18

  3. #3


    I’ve thought long and hard about this for a very long time. Ever since I identified myself as an “Adult Baby”, hell, before I even knew that’s what you called it; I’ve always thought of myself as my parent’s baby, even though I’m the first born of three. Where I come from, you are “forced” and “Praised” for grown up fast and taking on responsibility at a very young age. I’m not saying it’s a “bad” thing by any means, in fact I enjoyed being viewed as “wise” or “beyond my years” when I did something respectable.

    It wasn’t into my late teens when I noticed things changing around me and when I graduated high school, that’s when my childhood was lost forever. I used to stress out a lot, but I figured it was because of being new to everything and experiencing hardships one just wasn’t prepared for.

    I was still relatively new to the AB/DL scene, but I also began to use it as an “escape” if you will. Suddenly, wanting praises for doing “adult oriented” things didn’t take on that same appeal to me as it once did, but at the same time, being able to work and buy the things I’ve always wanted, have a say in where I wanted my life to go, etc. more than made it for it in my eyes.

    There was a time when I became so overly stressed out in my life, that I gravitated towards wanting to be an AB/DL 24/7. Hell, I even told my family, friends and a select few people within my workplace (which turned out to be the biggest mistake of my life) about my “baby side.”

    Today, I’m fourteen years older from the time I identified myself as an “adult baby”, married and in an open AB/DL relationship, although our partnership isn’t based around it by any means.

    To answer your question though, I do believe there is and I do have plenty of room for my “adult” life because, although and I’ll be totally honest, there’s some days when I get extremely stressed out, I’d rather be helpless in diapers than trying to tackle a hard project; there’s just so much I love about being an adult.

    I’ll admit there’s no other feeling in the world like having thick patting between your legs, pretending to be totally helpless and being shown LOTS of attention. On the other side of the coin, reading, working, gaming, conversations, hanging out, shopping, sex and a whole host of things as an adult, I just couldn’t see myself giving up just living as my baby persona.

    I won’t lie, I’d try it just because, that’s the type of person that I am and sometimes, curiosity does get the best of me. I just thing the overall result would end with me getting bored extremely quick, but then again, who knows.

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  6. #6


    I am a 23 year old woman who also happens to be 3 at times. This is how I vi it at lest. My little side is part of me and always will be. I can be an adult and express my little side in healthy ways.

  7. #7


    I love being little, which is probably I am little, but at the same time, I love my adult life, and if I couldn't be an adult that would be terrible and I would hate my life.

  8. #8


    There's plenty of room for me to be an adult because that's what I am. As an adult, I get to define what that means. I don't think I'm any more a child in a man's body than the average guy. I express my interests differently than most would but I don't see myself as a displaced child. All this stuff strikes powerful chords with me, but I think they're just things that I've associated with pleasure, comfort, arousal, etc.

  9. #9


    Like Trevor said beautifully, " As an adult, I get to define what that means." I think I fail at being a stereotypical adult more then others perhaps, but there are certainly very valued parts of me that don't fall in line with the concept of being a child. I'm not going to discard parts of me that aren't stereotypical towards a young heart either. I'm a lot more then a numbered age, or the stereotype of who a person is at a certain time of life.

    I have a tendency to tell people, in a joking sort of manner.. that I'm 6. I mean that somewhat because I feel like if you are going to define me with just age stereotypes, you might as well call me 6. However, I think that being a woman who tells people to refer to her as 6 is a lot closer of a definition of who I am. If that makes any sense at all.

  10. #10


    Hi, Jsaur. I'll be 25, but I still feel like 15. I don't think I'll ever grow up. I'm still young. Always will be.

    You know, there are some days where I want to quit my retail job and give up on my adult life. Just say "screw it" and walk out, go home. Forget all the bad and traumatic memories of being harmed or put down by others.

    Then I could just dive into Pleasure Land, a place free of responsibility and pain, and full of joy, freedom and support.

    But the real world never lets you go all the way. Your body matures, your brain develops, and others who are older constantly demand your attention and obedience.

    You have to feed and clean yourself. You even have to go to school and get a degree to find a job...because you are expected to.

    And through the early years and into today's adulthood, you seek previous pleasures of the past. You want to experience those noteworthy freedoms again, but most of what you remember are the painful moments that keep perpetuating and questioning your self worth inside. Yes, you want good moments of evaluation, but most moments are not good.

    The moments of rejection, of being attacked, of being treated unfairly, of being conflicted and tortured by others who have unsatisfactory lives, and of being forbidden to believe and act in certain ways.

    And what does the entire glut of expecting to act like an adult as a teenager do to you? It makes you want to regress, to go backward when things didn't have to make logical sense, where you didn't have to burn brain energy just to keep up with your daily life.

    You're a young teenager. You will not have the best balance of being little and being an adult. You will binge, you will crash, you will face guilt and mental anguish, rejection and blame. Above all, you will come out more damaged than ever.

    You and I, we don't want that "damaged" feeling. We can't stand 100 percent pain, so we want to come back healed and stronger from being damaged.

    Again, we want the magical feeling back in our lives, and not the pain and misery that constantly dumps on us from the real world.

    You know, the kind that constantly screams blame that you're wrong and here's what you must do to live a "normal" life. That one experience is somehow more critical and proper than another. That love and affection rarely exists in the world.

    SO, to have any sense of being stronger as an older human, you act like an "a-dult" to appease the majority of others, denying your desire to express how you truly feel out of self-protection and fear of being hurt again.

    You deny yourself, you punish yourself, and you do it all to sustain independent survivial.

    And THEN, you get sick of this status quo. You want your sense of magic back to make life worth living.

    You begin striking a balance between "adult" and "young." After all, now that you're older, you finally have the economical resources and living means to enjoy what your heart desires.

    But you still have to lean the pendulum back to the Real World and earn enough resources to visit Pleasure Land again. You can't stay for long in either land.

    And this is where, as a mature-minded human, you...strike a 50-50 balance.

    You wear diapers on your days off work, and you keep that job so you have money to live. You tolerate your parents' opinions, and you cope with loneliness and rejection on a daily basis.

    And then you find a balance for that, and reach out farther than ever, all the way across the nation on this forum.

    Some day you'll want to satisfy another of life's balances: to fulfill your goal of finding your ultimate partner, not a friend who merely acts as an understanding substitute, and whom will abandon you like everyone else did in the past.

    The scales of life will always shift back and forth, and be weighed against other life factors. One part of life can't exist without another.

    But if there's one thing we can do, it's strike a good balance and make the best of what we can have, both as adults and as young ones.

    After all, if we completely gave up, we'd be dead.

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