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Thread: Born Addicted.

  1. #1

    Default Born Addicted.

    I've been thinking lately about my life and my reoccurring depression.

    My mother was addicted to anti-depressants when I was born in the early 90's, this means that I was also addicted to them. When I was born I went in to withdrawal immediately and was put on morphine because I was in so much pain.

    I've read that children born to crack addicts will sometimes show great sensitivity to their surroundings (in the form of a dislike to change) and other behavioral issues. These were things I suffered from greatly as a child.

    I'm starting to wonder if being in contact with drugs from pretty much the moment of my conception has left me fundamentally broken. I suffer from depression frequently and it seems like a constant uphill struggle to remain positive. I'm wonder how much of this you guys think is caused by my upbringing (no parents, neglect and abuse at a young age, etc) and how much is down to being grown with drugs in my system. I can't help but think my brain is messed up from it...

  2. #2


    I can't really speak as a professional here, but the likelihood is that with having these drugs in your system from conception, it's possible that they messed with your brain's ability to secrete the hormones that are responsible for mood. I'm not sure how far in truth that is.It's not necessarily likely to cause the same effects as children born to crack addicts though. I don't believe it affects the same part of the brain. Do you take any antidepressants or mood altering drugs yourself?

    But I can tell you this much. You aren't fundamentally broken. Even you put all of those things that you mentioned in a box to analyse it, it still doesn't make you broken. You are a living, breathing person, and you have a live ahead of you to live. Even if you feel like you are lacking something because of your upbringing, or that your mother's addiction affected you, you still have so much more to look forward to and so much to give to this world.

    I understand that perhaps it seems like you have a more difficult road to climb to get to the same state of bliss as other people do, consider the fact that all of that struggle, it gives you strength as well. It strengthens your ability to understand yourself, to find ways to fix what is broken. The moment you do end up getting to a point where you feel somewhat satisfied with your life, even if it lasts a short time, you are able to do much more with that, and give more to the world in that instant, than someone who lives a blissful life of ignorance. You understand what it is like to go through the difficulties of your own life, so you are much more capable of helping and empathising with other people who might experience it.

    That very thing that you dislike about yourself, is something that also gives you the tools to do something with your life, and you should never give up hope that things will get better.

    It's never about what happened, or whose fault it is, or whether your childhood caused you to end up /broken/. It's about what you are capable of doing despite all of it, and how you handle your life. You know what it is like to feel pain and abandonment, so you are capable of relating and helping someone in that situation to a greater extent than someone who has had an easy life.

    I'm not saying all of those things that you mentioned don't matter. They have shaped you to be the person that you are. They are an important part of yourself, but you shouldn't look at them as things that cause your downfall, but rather reasons why you won't fall when life throws hardships at you.

    I guess my point is that you shouldn't live in your past and waste time constantly blaming it for your present. Allow it to be like a scar that reminds you how much you have survived. Because that is what you are, a survivor. You are still here, you still have everything ahead of you, and still young. Keep learning how to cope with everything, and find things to be grateful for what you do have. Even when things seem really bleak.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Born Addicted.

    Hi MrPurple,

    Firstly, a big (((hug))) to you.

    Secondly, I think a combination of the drugs in your neo-natal body PLUS your upbringing will have impacted upon your life to a great extent.

    Thirdly, Depression CAN be hereditary, so your genes could have decided you were eventually going to get it, the second you were conceived.

    If you look at your upbringing, it is the typical scenario/stereotype for causing mental health problems, so there is no surprise that you have problems, add to that the hereditary side of mental health issues, then the fact that you were receiving AD's for the whole 9 months or so that you were inside your Mum, PLUS any time that you were breast fed IF you were, you really didn't have much chance of NOT having issues really.

    Have you talked to your GP, requested counselling, on AD's already or anything?

    If the answers to them are no, then the first step would be to go to your GP, or the practice nurse and talk to them about it.

    Mental Health is not to be messed with, it requires a happy balance of various elements, it sounds like you are completely off-balance and need someone to help you re-balance your mind, body and soul.

    I am not talking from a religious perspective, or a "hippy type" perspective, it is my perspective - as a long term sufferer of depression, possible asperger's, and having led a REALLY sh1tty life up to meeting my FiancÚ 9 + 1/3 years ago.

    Feel free to pm me if you want to talk about things in more depth. (I am NOT "hitting on you", I am simply saying I have "ears", (or more appropriately eyes, to read your message heheh) if you need someone to "listen")

    Kind regards,


  4. #4


    The jist of your story sounds like you may have had a bumpy and turbulent childhood (birth-13 yrs). These factors that include instability, abandonment, lack of proper nurturing, or hostile environment at an early age lead to adolescent miscues in navigating a future or having the feeling of 'stable ground' and can feel chaotic and unbalanced.

    The feeling I am getting is that you are trying to pin-point an exact source for your feelings of "being broken" or "messed up".

    I can assure you that there are a great deal of young adults feeling the same way. They were 'slighted' when it came to a 'normal up-bringing'.

    While being born with addictions can lead to abnormalities, my understanding so far is that it is usually an extreme situation based on narcotics or other drugs that lead an expectant mother to deprive herself of nutrition that lead to complications in normal fetal growth. For example: A mother who consumes alchohol sparingly during pregnancy (*not reccomended) is not directly harming the growing infant. It is the class of behavior that leads to problems with pregnancy due to careless consumption of alcohol coupled closely with nicotine addiction and a general carelessness in medical treatment and nutrition and maybe even drug use. Then if the child is born normal by all accounts it is subject to that same carelessness in up-bringing and nurturing. Note: addictions like alcohol can be passed genetically through DNA but a mother can pass this gene on without ever consuming alcohol herself.

    It is up to you to evaluate where on the scale you are. Is it exactly the result of being born addicted? Is it a phycological issue due to instability in early-childhood? Is it perhaps the recent past few years that leave you feeling inadequate due to either 'not fitting in' or 'feeling unchallenged' or bored with lack of interest? Is it an entirely different set of challenges that you have recently faced that leave you feeling this way and seeking answers?

    The good news to all of this is that you are feeling inherently needing to fix the bouts of depression and there are many resources to lean on including therapy. Remember, depression in not uncommon and does not mean you are 'messed up'. You are still young and going through probably the most difficult time of your life. Your ambitions probably outweigh your energy or time and coupled with questions of childhood it can leave one feeling overwhelmed.

    If you are currently taking prescriptions then you may get them re-evaluated. If you are using recreational tools such as alcohol or drugs they may/will hinder your normal mood producing hormones such as andrenaline, dopaming, seratonin, and endorphines and render you feeling 'drained'.

    I work with someone who tried to set kill himself by lighting his truck on fire while sitting inside it. I was shocked to learn of it as he always seemed happy at work but later described to me his bouts with depression. He also had a rough childhood.

    I hope you find your answers, remain strong, and not give-in to self doubt. There is alot of livin' to do especially from your age.

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