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Thread: An argument that fails with me

  1. #1

    Default An argument that fails with me

    Whenever I would be on Babycenter, sometimes I would see threads about rather to change a baby after they wet once or not. Some parents do actually change their kids after one accident and others have them stay in it because it can hold more and there is no poo. When I found out there were actually people who won't change a diaper unless there is poo, that made me wonder if they just leave their child in a leaky diaper because a kid doesn't always poop before they are very wet and are leaking. Plus I have noticed the diaper gets real saggy and looks uncomfortable by the shape of it when it's wet so I change it on my child. That made me wonder how do parents even leave their kids in the same diaper when it gets out of shape and sags.

    So I have seen quite a few debates about when to change diapers and the argument moms were using was "Would you want to sit in your own waste?" and others were saying karma could come and get them and they might get left in their same diaper when they are old and I thought in my head how that argument wouldn't work with me because I actually like being in wet diapers. it wouldn't bother me if I wet myself and had to stay in it. So I would fail to see their point they are trying to make because wet diapers don't bother me so why would it bother a child to be in it or an elderly?


    One time my Mom found out when my son poops, I take the diaper off and dump the poop out and put it back on him because it didn't stick to the diaper. Mom told me that was so gross and then it smells and gives him an infection. Then she asked me if that I what I do with mine and I said yes. Then she told me "That is so gross and then you smell."

    I knew she was trying to make a point about how I should change him after a poopy diaper and I wouldn't like it but because I do it to myself, her argument failed because I didn't see her point. I am sure she was shocked I did that to myself so no wonder I was doing it to my child. But I never like wasting a diaper.

    Does anyone else laugh or get a kick of of this sort of argument because their logic fails with us? I just don't see their point because I like staying in my wet diapers and messy ones too. So to do that to me when I am old wouldn't even be karma. Especially if anything happened and I ended up needing them and had to have someone do it for me because I was too weak to do it myself.

    I know this is an argument people use as a way to get other parents to have empathy and think of if they would like it done to them so why put their child through it? But what about people who wouldn't mind being in a wet diaper or messy one, then this argument would fail because they wouldn't see your point. That would be us all right.

  2. #2

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    I am thoroughly disgusted by fecal matter so when I use diapers I change almost immediately after I poop (or I find a potty to poop in). Exactly when to change a wet diaper is definitely more of a subjective question, if it's swelling then you should obviously change it but if it is just catching little trickles the baby is probably still dry then I wouldn't.

    I'll stay in a wet diaper for a bit because it can be somewhat enjoyable however it's far more enjoyable to change into a dry one in a little bit. However if I'm wearing a high end diaper I'm definitely staying in it so I get enough use out of it to justify its price.

  3. #3

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    I don't think we have to share a feeling to understand that it isn't shared universally. Objectively, I think one would have to look at the child in their care and see if they appear to be made uncomfortable. Cleanliness is also a relevant factor, so whether or not the child cared, I think the best policy would be to keep the child clean for its own health and pleasant interaction with others. This is a judgment call, and it would be one that is left up to parents unless it is seen to be abusive.

    What you are talking about does not sound abusive to me on its face. I don't have a child but I don't think I'd be comfortable with it. My mother was practically obsessed with child cleanliness, and that influence is strong. My personal opinion on diapers isn't really relevant in this case. My reasons for wearing render my preferences pretty much moot. The karma argument is unpersuasive, as I find karma a silly notion. That doesn't prevent me from attempting to do the best within reason for the people I care about.

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by Calico View Post
    ["..."]

    One time my Mom found out when my son poops, I take the diaper off and dump the poop out and put it back on him because it didn't stick to the diaper. Mom told me that was so gross and then it smells and gives him an infection. Then she asked me if that I what I do with mine and I said yes. Then she told me "That is so gross and then you smell."

    I knew she was trying to make a point about how I should change him after a poopy diaper and I wouldn't like it but because I do it to myself, her argument failed because I didn't see her point. I am sure she was shocked I did that to myself so no wonder I was doing it to my child. But I never like wasting a diaper.

    Does anyone else laugh or get a kick of of this sort of argument because their logic fails with us? I just don't see their point ["..."]
    The problem with

    Quote Originally Posted by Calico View Post
    because it didn't stick to the diaper
    ...is, that sufficient bacteria from the 'fecal-matter' do 'stick' or remain in the diaper, and it at very least causes the break-down of urea from the urine to form ammonia...which more rapidly breaks-down the skins natural defenses...leading to a much higher susceptibility in contracting a potentially very nasty rash.

    While I am all for frugality...I don't agree that this is the place to be so frugal...not with a child anyway. It's up to you, to risk that for your own wearing. So, while the nature of your mother's argument may not be as correct...the results of it for this particular case...is correct.

  5. #5

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    I grew up in the age of plastic pants and cloth diapers. Back then I think most parents left their kid in a wet diaper till it leaked or was in danger of leaking. In the summer you’d see toddlers in diapers that were obviously soaked with their mother showing no concern. It was a different time, the more you changed the more you had to wash.

  6. #6

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    I'm not a big fan of reusing single-use diapers for any reason. As others have mentioned, the badness of poop isn't just what you see, it's also the bacteria and chemicals you don't see, and simply dumping out the former doesn't mean the latter aren't still present and still working on your baby's skin. I'd definitely vote for a clean diaper at every change.

    If it's for financial reasons that you're reusing diapers like this, then at least for baby's sake, it might be worth considering cloth diapers. They can be a bit of an investment or not so much, depending on how handy you are (or want to be). My wife made the cloth diapers we used on our kids for their first years, and she used old bath towels and old flannel bed sheets. And they worked fantastically. The only things we went out and bought were the PUL covers. Of course, laundry is an expense too.

    I've put two kids through diapers, and I don't remember ever agonizing about when a change was necessary. It always seemed like a pretty obvious thing: If there was a poop smell, a strong pee smell, the diaper was visibly full, visibly leaking, etc., then it got changed. Generally, if it occurred to us that it had been several hours since the last change, then we'd change regardless. (Having baby's midsection marinading in even a relatively small quantity of poop/pee for a long period of time isn't great.) We certainly didn't have a stopwatch running or anything! And then there were always clean diapers at bedtime or right before long car/plane rides. Again, obvious stuff IMO.

  7. #7

    Default Re: An argument that fails with me

    Another perspective to see it is that some parents live on a tight budget. At the same time parents are over worked and stressed. The disposable diapers these days are capable of being bacteria resistant to a point. Urine is sterile when it leaves the body. Babies have smaller bladders and diapers are made to accommodate more than a "single use." Diapers cost about 10-15 bucks per jumbo pack. You as diaper wearers probably don't change a diaper after single urine void mostly. You don't want to waste it. Same thing goes for parents. Back in the day, babies used to stay in the same diaper for a month or more at a time. Yes, times have changed. Parents usually do change diapers once the diaper is messy. No one likes the smell. Then there is neglectful parents in the world but bad apples are everywhere.

    Some people make sure the diaper is used to its limits for economic reasons, and some people are germaphobes. Yes, cloth diapers can be a cheaper alternative. Some people don't want urine and fecal matter in their washers either. Some are just disgusted by dealing with washing them in the first place.

  8. #8

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    I do use cloth, it costs money to do the laundry because we had coin operated machines. I also used disposables and I was telling my mother good thing they bought them instead of me or I would have just dumped the poop out and put it back on him and that was when my mother told that.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MeTaLMaNN1983 View Post
    Another perspective to see it is that some parents live on a tight budget. At the same time parents are over worked and stressed. The disposable diapers these days are capable of being bacteria resistant to a point. Urine is sterile when it leaves the body. Babies have smaller bladders and diapers are made to accommodate more than a "single use." Diapers cost about 10-15 bucks per jumbo pack. You as diaper wearers probably don't change a diaper after single urine void mostly. You don't want to waste it. Same thing goes for parents. Back in the day, babies used to stay in the same diaper for a month or more at a time. Yes, times have changed. Parents usually do change diapers once the diaper is messy. No one likes the smell. Then there is neglectful parents in the world but bad apples are everywhere.

    Some people make sure the diaper is used to its limits for economic reasons, and some people are germaphobes. Yes, cloth diapers can be a cheaper alternative. Some people don't want urine and fecal matter in their washers either. Some are just disgusted by dealing with washing them in the first place.
    Did I read that right about a baby staying in the same diaper for a month? By then it would be way beyond leaking an the baby would have had tons of infections on their skin because their diaper had not been changed in a month. I can also imagine smelly too and leaking all over.

  9. #9

    Default Re: An argument that fails with me



    Quote Originally Posted by Calico View Post
    I do use cloth, it costs money to do the laundry because we had coin operated machines. I also used disposables and I was telling my mother good thing they bought them instead of me or I would have just dumped the poop out and put it back on him and that was when my mother told that.

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    Did I read that right about a baby staying in the same diaper for a month? By then it would be way beyond leaking an the baby would have had tons of infections on their skin because their diaper had not been changed in a month. I can also imagine smelly too and leaking all over.
    Its true, I've read up on diaper history in the past. Not that the poo stays in it. Not hygienic at all, but all true.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Calico View Post
    Does anyone else laugh or get a kick of of this sort of argument because their logic fails with us? I just don't see their point because I like staying in my wet diapers and messy ones too. So to do that to me when I am old wouldn't even be karma. Especially if anything happened and I ended up needing them and had to have someone do it for me because I was too weak to do it myself.

    I know this is an argument people use as a way to get other parents to have empathy and think of if they would like it done to them so why put their child through it? But what about people who wouldn't mind being in a wet diaper or messy one, then this argument would fail because they wouldn't see your point. That would be us all right.
    The argument works just fine with me.

    I think that a lot of people in this community genuinely don't understand that other people are not interested in wearing diapers, especially not wet or soiled diapers. Either they genuinely don't understand (or can't understand, perhaps the problem stems from an autistic lack of empathy) or they don't want to understand, possibly due to an uncomfortable feeling of alienation from more normal people.

    People don't like the idea of sitting in a wet diaper for a myriad of reasons. And even though, on a personal level (i.e., when one considers oneself and only oneself), someone may not relate to the argument, because he himself enjoys sitting in a wet diaper, he should be able to know that other people find the idea of sitting in a wet diaper to be disgusting, even if he can't relate to it. Unless someone has an inability to empathize (i.e., to understand the feelings of others) or a psychological impediment in relation to this issue, he or she should be able to understand that most people dislike sitting in a wet or messy diaper.

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