Okay. So this is.. a bit weird. And if anyone who knows me reads this, they'd probably think it very unlike me.. But I have to get something off my chest.. And perhaps an opinion (perhaps a psychiatric one as well, because after reading this I guarantee a lot of you are going to consider me sick/nutty.)
Well, here goes.
I've been talking to this girl. I'm popular, she's not. I'm rather outgoing. She's painfully shy. Anyways. We started off just casually talking, and then sitting with each other at lunch (she goes to the same school as me). And we got really into talking and a buncha stuff came out that I never tell people, both AB/furry/whatnot related and non-related. A bunch of interests I had that I swore no one had in the same or similar combination I did. Which was mindblowing. Turns out she's a furry, and she also is quite interested (after me explaining it to her) in dipping her feet in the whole *B/babyfur thing. And on top of that we just have a mindblowing amount of things in common. She is just. like. me. in a creepy amount of ways. And I think I might be starting to fall for her.
Now, here it is.
Um, well, I don't know how else to put this.. but she's 14. I'm 18. Yes, you read that correctly. Now, before the judge-hammer comes down and everyone 'splodes, I just wanna say: in my defense, I've honestly never ever ever felt like this about another human being before, and I have quite a, um, dating history. I enjoy a decent amount of popularity and, according to some, a decent set of looks to go with it. But I digress. I. Have. Never. Felt. Like. This. Before. And it's scary. And she feels the same way, but I mean.. I do know she's 14 and has an iota of the dating experience that I do but..
I just...Jeebus, what do I do? What is even my life.
Is pursuing this even anywhere in the BALLPARK of acceptable? I mean... I wouldn't ever.. you know, get physical with her...until she's legal. God no.
We just have this sweet, innocent, cute sort of puppy love that I've always wanted. So many people I've dated have all this heavy baggage and serious emotional problems and lost their innocence ages ago. I seem to attract myself to the teenage/young adult equivalents of biker babes, lol. And I just.. ugh, I don't know. What am I even thinking?
I mean, I guess what got me really really thinking about all of this is, she sits next to me on the bus. And today, I dunno why, when I sat next to her, she said, "Hi! :3" in her tiny voice, and slowly laced her fingers between mine and rested her head on my arm. I didn't know whether to melt or cringe. And I kinda mentally did both.
I just really don't even know... what to even like... dammit, guys.