Hey there, I have't been much of a poster but I think this is something that should be posted?....
Before this year, there was perhaps 2 people that knew I was a DL/AB) and those were years ago. It never made much difference I don't know where those people are in the world now.
Fast forward, a couple months ago I told an ex because it was the reason we never did anything-on my part, she had her own issues. It was uncomfortable, but we still remain really good friends. Which is sooo weird to me.
Then it got stranger, I told my new drinking buddy at the time since he was so open about being gay. Then I told his former lover, who is still a friend, because he come out about not being straight months ago.
Then in between telling those two, one of their friends I've never met talks to me a lot on FB--and I told her to explain my unique perspective on relationships.
Then I told a very close friend who I pretty much consider "my big sister."
Here's the kicker, when I tell them (big sis and ex having kids themselves) it's like not even a thing. In fact big sis even said "It all makes sense now," as did my close friend.
I've told 5 people in a 6 month period, more than I have ever in my life before--And so far no one has ousted me. I'm in between being super apprecaitive and super vulnerable. I love it. I hate it. I am thus far treated the same as I always have been-It hasn't been a shock to anyone, and my friends with kids haven't labeled me. My ultimate doomsday scenario has completely collapsed, and its such a mixed reaction I'm feeling right now. Like perspective on life changed just a little bit for the better.
I'm still not totally into the lifestyle, but ...I don't have to be as afraid of it as i once was....and I seem to possibly be maturing enough to handle the fact that I have a toddler inside me...as weird as that seems to me.....It's really the only obstacle I've not been able to face. But maybe I am starting to?
I think my ultimate reasoning for posting this is not only to express myself, but maybe somehow help someone else? Even as I wrestle with it, this is perhaps the most important thing to happen to me as an infantilist. Second only to finding the awesome site of adisc.
I've learned that, at least sometimes, you can be open about it with your inner circle, and as long as they know you will enough--nothing has to change and in some ways it can get better because of that level of trust, even though its frightening at the same time.
If you read (or tried to at least) my jumbled thoughts, than thank you.....i needed to say something.....
(I hope I have written this well enough, please forgive if I haven't. )