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Thread: Finally Told

  1. #1

    Default Finally Told

    Hey everyone, sorry if i'm doing anything wrong by kind of re posting something I posted earlier but as the title says I told my girlfriend (there is a thread in mature topics about the struggle I had to actually do it. But this is kind of an update as to where we are and Id like to know what people thought of the situation:

    ''So I told, I really didn't think I would but I did. It was hard, emotional, but ultimately thanks to my wonderful girlfriend, it was a weight off my shoulders. I stupidly got her worked up worrying about what it was, but slowly broke it to her. I tried to outline what I liked, what I didn't like, that it didn't change me and that I was expecting nothing from her. She was pretty amazing, at first she laughed and I could really see the relief (she was really panicking what it was). We talked and she told me she still loved me, if not more so for being able to open up. She could see how hard it was. We parted in really good terms. When she got home on her own it changed a bit, I begged her to be completely honest no matter what and she told me she was struggling a little bit to get her head around it and she had a funny moment when she was a bit emotional. What bothers her is that I hid it, but not so much because she didn't know because I had to go through it myself. She's such a caring person. The last few days have been pretty wonderful and we seem even more in love with each other which I really couldn't believe was possible. There's just a whole new bond between us. So anyone considering telling I would say do it, but be honest from the start and make sure there is a real bond there.

    The only negative out of the whole thing is since opening up the urges and desires to wear have been amplified ten-fold. I'm really struggling to suppress my desires but with it only being a few days I don't think its the time to talk much more about it. My partner said last night she's not ready to go in depth about it, but soon we will she just needs time to take it in, which makes sense. I asked her to show me what she had Google'd after I told her (some threads and questions online get some really strange replies). There was one in particular I didn't want her see because it wasn't an abdl but as I should have guessed of the two she looked at it was one. She was fine about it though. When we were browsing last night for what she read two videos came on of people wearing and she covered them up. She realized instantly and said she just didn't want see other peoples backsides. I knew that wasn't the case though, but I'm trying to give her as much space and time as possible.

    To anyone that has told, how long after the initial shock could you start to really open up, and maybe even wear in front of your partner. I don't want to scare my girlfriend with too much, but I'm struggling to fight off desires at the moment. Thanks for the advice everyone, it gave me the guts to tell her and I ''think'' were going to be stronger for it.''

    Sorry if Ive done anything wrong here
    Thanks Everyone

  2. #2


    Keep your wearing private for a good while. I understand the need your little side has for affection, I really do, but pushing it will hurt things in the long run. Try acting it out in more subtle ways first. Perhaps sucking a thumb, or get caught cuddling a plushie. Little things that are far less creepy to someone that doesn't understand. I am not saying don't express it, but DON'T wear or do anything drastic. Small little gestures will probably work and help soothe the desires. My suggestion, try NOT to do all those together....Sucking your thumb and cuddling a plushie and playing with a baby toy, etc. will really freak her out most likely. Express it in more acceptable ways.

  3. #3


    Hi, you know your story sounds so partner reacted in much the same way, not so long ago. I totally relate to your AB feelings going into overdrive after telling her, and agree with CO that you take it really slow for now. I kinda launched into it a bit at first, but realized I needed to pull back cause it was all just a bit too much for her...that's tough cause all I really want is to show her all of my little side. it's actually only been about four months or so, and though it has been a little up and down, she is starting to 'find Me' if that makes sense. Mind you my situation is a bit different to yours i guess, as we've been living together for 6 years. You're a brave dude, hang in there, and I hope it all works out for you.

  4. #4

    Default Finally Told

    I can relate to your situation as well. The communication between my s/o has been very limited but amazingly as you also pointed out, it has really brought us closer. I would recommend people share their abdl side only if they are "strong enough" to brave out the storm. I'm not saying that there is always a treasure chest at the end of a rainbow but patience is key.

  5. #5


    Thanks for advice everyone its much appreciated. We've been good over the last few days and the wave of desire is slowly subsiding. I'm just getting on with other things when I can and occasionally popping on here, it helps to get over it We really couldn't believe the timing of the show that is on over here on Thursday about adult babies. I think were going to watch it together, which is her decision I'm worried it will overwhelm her, but she's adamant she'd probably watch it if she wasn't with me that night anyway, so its better to be with me so we can talk about it and explain things. Bit nervous about it tbh, i'm mainly dl but because its kind of linked she wants to watch it. I'm putting no pressure on her for anything but shes making such an effort to understand. I agree with everyone, telling was the best thing I did, I feel less guilty and ashamed because I don't feel like I have this big secret over me, and I now know for sure that she loves every part of me, no matter how different that is. Only time will really tell but atm i'm very glad I said something.

    Thanks again everyone

  6. #6

  7. #7


    If she understands how hard it is to open up about such things she should understand why you hid it from her. Discuss the embarrassment, humiliation and stigma behind diaper and let her know how hard it was to come out to her.

    As for the negative being a trigger for you wanting to wear diapers more you should know that anything that creates stress has the potential of triggering the need to wear diapers. You can discuss this with her as well as it will help her to better understand you and your needs. I she knows that stress and conflict will trigger more of a desire to use, she will be able to deal with this side effect.

  8. #8


    Make sure she doesn't think it's a phase. Make sure she knows you still find her important and not finding diapers more important than her and try and make sure she understands diapers is something you need and it's not something you can change and it has nothing to do with her.

  9. #9


    i was able to start wearing the next day but my fiance is very accepting of anything i like as long as i act like an adult when need be

  10. #10


    Quote Originally Posted by timmyneedshelp View Post
    To anyone that has told, how long after the initial shock could you start to really open up, and maybe even wear in front of your partner. I don't want to scare my girlfriend with too much, but I'm struggling to fight off desires at the moment. Thanks for the advice everyone, it gave me the guts to tell her and I ''think'' were going to be stronger for it.''
    Thanks Everyone
    I had almost the exact same situation a few months ago. I worked up the courage to tell my gf, and she reacted almost exactly the same way. To answer your question, it took about 4 months of open and honest communication before she let me wear a diaper to bed...and based on her reaction and some of the advice I've seen on this forum, that may have even been moving a little fast. She's still very supportive and wants to accept and love this as a part of me. We still have a lot of talking and working things out to do. Best of luck trying to make it all work.

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