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Thread: Is being a ABDL/TBDL is a choice? :$

  1. #1

    Lightbulb Is being a ABDL/TBDL is a choice? :$

    That's my question^ I've always wonder that~ Cause me and my friend were just thinking that earlier, cause some AB said it's not a choice. :L And yes I'm a TBDL/babyfur and I love baby/cute stuff~ ^w^

  2. #2

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    Yes, I do believe that being AB/DL is a choice. You can choose to act upon these desires or you can shut them out. But with that said I also believe that while being AB/DL maybe be a choice, it is also who we are. So someone may choose to not act upon the AB/DL desires but they are still an AB/DL.

  3. #3

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    Well I ertainly didn't choose to be curiois about wearing diapers again or anything, but I do choose to act upon it sometimes. The babyish stuff and wearing of diapers is surely a choice as it having stuffed animals still/again. But the wanting of diapers is something I think no person would ever intend on. I think most if not all of us at one point wished we didn't like this sort of stuff. It's better these days with the internet and being older.

    But as a kid (age 3-10 before internet) it caused me all kinds of grief, worry and I didn't dare tell anyone since I never heard of such a thing before. Therefor I knew it wasn't normal. And even know I don't think I would wish it on anybody or force anyone to do anything with it.


    P.S. I'm not saying we're born with it. It develops for all kinds of various reasons and takes root.

  4. #4

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    Naleas put it pretty well
    I think... well actually dang, Naleas you hit the nail on the head... atleast in my opinion

  5. #5
    Cygnus

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    Somebody does have to make the descision wether or not they apply the AB/DL label to themselves. In that case, it is a choice.

    Somebody doesn't make the choice to be interested in ABDL-related items if it comes naturally to them. In this case, it isn't a choice.

    Somebody has to make the choice whether or not to act upon the curiosity they have of ABDL-related items. In this case, it is a choice.

    Is it a choice or not? It really depends on what you think makes a person an ABDL.

    In my opinion, it is a choice to become an ABDL because it's a conscious descision to apply that label to yourself.

  6. #6
    SkarTiger

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    This may seem totally irrelevant, but during the early 19th century, it was believed that notorious criminals or people who committed smaller crimes alike, were born that way. It was thought that if their head was a certain shape when they were born, then they would grow up to be a criminal. As if they were just tied to their destiny and they will become criminals during their lives. Now, this belief was carried out until the beginning of the 20th century when society moved on from that and it was thought that criminals were the victims of circumstance.

    Still it has the same context. It could be argued that we have no choice whether we want to become AB/DLs maybe everyone has infantile feelings throughout their lives but only a small minority of people decide to act on them? I do not think it necessarily a choice for us to have infantile thoughts and feelings but as Cygnus said, it becomes a choice when someone wants to apply themselves to them. Still, no-one really knows the true causes of infantilism. We may never. Therefore we need to think of it as the whole context of gaining infantile thoughts and feelings.

    I think that it isn't a choice. Take the Binge-Purge cycle for example. Even though the people who have suffered it feel extremely guilty and tormented inside, the boomerang of infantilism still comes back to them. They still enjoy it even after they have felt that guilt. So, in that case, it does not make infantilism a choice that is completely influenced by you.

    Skar

  7. #7

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    It's not a choice by any means. Naleas I think has the right idea, but wrong terminology. Something that is a choice is fully under your control. You make a choice as to what you want to have for breakfast. Being something is inherently not a choice. I cannot choose to not be a TB/DL as much as I cannot choose to be straight. BUT I agree when he said that we choose how we act upon something. I can choose how I act, but I cannot choose how I am. I can choose to act straight and I can choose to act like I'm not a TB/DL, but that will only do me some manner of harm.

    In short, no, it's not a choice. You can, however, choose to act or to not act upon what you are, but with some manner of consequence.

    Also, side note, as Fire2Box said, we're not born with it. It's psychologically and logically impossible considering we have no knowledge of what diapers are or how we will act before birth.

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by SkarTiger View Post
    This may seem totally irrelevant, but during the early 19th century, it was believed that notorious criminals or people who committed smaller crimes alike, were born that way. It was thought that if their head was a certain shape when they were born, then they would grow up to be a criminal. As if they were just tied to their destiny and they will become criminals during their lives. Now, this belief was carried out until the beginning of the 20th century when society moved on from that and it was thought that criminals were the victims of circumstance.

    Still it has the same context. It could be argued that we have no choice whether we want to become AB/DLs maybe everyone has infantile feelings throughout their lives but only a small minority of people decide to act on them? I do not think it necessarily a choice for us to have infantile thoughts and feelings but as Cygnus said, it becomes a choice when someone wants to apply themselves to them. Still, no-one really knows the true causes of infantilism. We may never. Therefore we need to think of it as the whole context of gaining infantile thoughts and feelings.

    I think that it isn't a choice. Take the Binge-Purge cycle for example. Even though the people who have suffered it feel extremely guilty and tormented inside, the boomerang of infantilism still comes back to them. They still enjoy it even after they have felt that guilt. So, in that case, it does not make infantilism a choice that is completely influenced by you.

    Skar
    Not necessarily irrelevant, actually that reminded me of how I had been thinking about why I am this way...
    I think its really a huge combination of things...

    I think the interest in diapers could stem from numerous things (lack of attention when little, too much attention when little, feelings of comfort, that whole desire to be free of the worries of the Adult world... list could go on for a while).

    A while back I admitted to my first girlfriend that I liked diapers and her response wasn't something i'd expected (in reality I expected to hear, OMG Your so weird, or some crap like that...) she actually considered it for a second and asked what it was about them I liked and as I explained it she started to admit that it sounded nice, and sounded like something really good.

    Now where was I going with that? Oh yeah... I think in some way, shape, or form we all long for the freedom of being little (no worries, all the comfort, the simplicity of it all, etc.). So in that respect I think the desire is inside everyone but I don't think that desire is recognized by everyone, and even of those who do recognize it how many act upon it? So yes it is a choice to become an ABDL/TBDL but I really think if you were to get down to a personal level with someone and got them to think it over a little while, they would probably admit that being little would be a nice release from the real world. (I think on the outside people have a misconception that we want to be little 100% of the time... and while I wouldn't mind a weekend or so of being little 24/7 I really can't say i'd be able to take it 100% of the time. And now I think i'm rambling lol)

    actually going back over this post, the biggest influence on being and ABDL/TBDL that comes to my mind would be the stresses of the Adult world, which could bring out the interest in wanting to be carefree and little which could lead to diapers and feelings of being ABDL/TBDL. I think in one way or another we're all kind of touching on the same basic idea though.

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by Shadowhawk View Post
    I cannot choose to not be a TB/DL as much as I cannot choose to be straight. BUT I agree when he said that we choose how we act upon something. I can choose how I act, but I cannot choose how I am. I can choose to act straight and I can choose to act like I'm not a TB/DL, but that will only do me some manner of harm.

    In short, no, it's not a choice. You can, however, choose to act or to not act upon what you are, but with some manner of consequence.

    Also, side note, as Fire2Box said, we're not born with it. It's psychologically and logically impossible considering we have no knowledge of what diapers are or how we will act before birth.
    Shadowhawk, I do believe that this is a choice and I was using the correct terminology. You see saying that you cannot choose to be AB/DL is mistaken. Although we aren't born with this, we can still choose if we want to participate. Comparing this to gay/straight is unrealistic, AB/DL is not a sexuality. True there are aspects of sexuality in AB/DL but AB/DL is not a sexual nature. If it was I could only marry another AB/DL. So the comparison between the two isn't accurate.

    I am not trying to bash you but when you said being something isn't a choice, with sexuality that is right but with things like intelligence, laziness, and religions those are examples of things that you can be with having that basic choice.

    So to summarize I believe AB/DL is a choice because we all have a choice to do what we want to do and AB/DL is one of the things I want to do. So in that regard it is a choice. The only times that it isn't a choice is before most people accept their true AB/DL self.

  10. #10
    SkarTiger

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    Quote Originally Posted by WittleHirvi View Post
    Not necessarily irrelevant, actually that reminded me of how I had been thinking about why I am this way...
    I think its really a huge combination of things...

    I think the interest in diapers could stem from numerous things (lack of attention when little, too much attention when little, feelings of comfort, that whole desire to be free of the worries of the Adult world... list could go on for a while).

    A while back I admitted to my first girlfriend that I liked diapers and her response wasn't something i'd expected (in reality I expected to hear, OMG Your so weird, or some crap like that...) she actually considered it for a second and asked what it was about them I liked and as I explained it she started to admit that it sounded nice, and sounded like something really good.

    Now where was I going with that? Oh yeah... I think in some way, shape, or form we all long for the freedom of being little (no worries, all the comfort, the simplicity of it all, etc.). So in that respect I think the desire is inside everyone but I don't think that desire is recognized by everyone, and even of those who do recognize it how many act upon it? So yes it is a choice to become an ABDL/TBDL but I really think if you were to get down to a personal level with someone and got them to think it over a little while, they would probably admit that being little would be a nice release from the real world. (I think on the outside people have a misconception that we want to be little 100% of the time... and while I wouldn't mind a weekend or so of being little 24/7 I really can't say i'd be able to take it 100% of the time. And now I think i'm rambling lol)

    actually going back over this post, the biggest influence on being and ABDL/TBDL that comes to my mind would be the stresses of the Adult world, which could bring out the interest in wanting to be carefree and little which could lead to diapers and feelings of being ABDL/TBDL. I think in one way or another we're all kind of touching on the same basic idea though.
    Well, that was very lucky that you had such an understanding girlfriend. So did she actually do anything with diapers after she said it sou ded nice or did she just accept you?

    It could be possible that the desires are in all of us but only a handful of people recognise them. When I was younger and I was about 6 years old. When I started getting infantile feelings, I thought everybody had them but still, I didn't really tell anyone as I did not understand what they meant.

    There are a lot of possible suggestions: lack of security as a child; stresses about the adult world; wanting some for of escapism etc. Still, it could be that the people who do recognise infantile thoughts don't do it by accident, maybe they are forced upon them?
    Skar

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