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Thread: Sometimes I think this is a mental illness

  1. #1

    Default Sometimes I think this is a mental illness

    I like wearing them, I really do. I don't mind being a AB either. I like using pacifiers and sippy cups but I know there is no way I'd be able to give up diapers for life. Diapers also help me enjoy sex and not mind having it. I don't get bored during it either just as long as we talk about diapers and our other AB/DL fantasies and diapers. We also talk about other things too that are none sexual because it keeps me busy during sex.

    But if I were with a vanilla partner, our sex would suck because I wouldn't enjoy it, I'd be miserable, the man would think I suck in bed because we are not doing diapers during it nor talking about them and my fantasies. It be a shame I would need to involve diapers for sex in order for me to enjoy it and be turned on so it be a lot easier for the penis to go inside me. It would cause friction in our relationship and a roadblock and then a break up because the sex sucked all because I needed diapers for it and I couldn't have them because it was a turn off for him. Luckily my husband does not mind me lying there as he lies on top of me doing it and I find all the other sex moves and the methods gross and I don't enjoy being on top and working out during sex. Prude you can say. I only like intercourse and I can live without sex because it's not a huge poirity (sp) for me.

    So I got lucky to meet another person who also liked diapers and likes women in them and them acting like babies. This "illness" is not even a problem for me because I am with the right guy. Also I have acceptance from my parents and they don't have a problem with me doing it. I think my mom did but she ignored it over it the years because she knew it was something I needed and I was an adult. So it makes my life a lot easier with diapers and being an AB. I also see it as a difference. Everyone has different needs for sex and mine just happens to be diapers. But unfortunately lot of people wouldn't be willing to do it and it be hard for them to use them for sex so it would make it a "illness" or a "disorder" for us because it makes our lives harder due to intolerance and lack of understanding and also the effect it can cause us if we don't accept it in ourselves and indulge in it. I remember how bad things were in 6th grade when I badly wanted them but couldn't wear any and I so wanted to kill myself and couldn't handle the feelings inside me anymore and couldn't wait to be an adult so I can wear them. I don't want to go back to those feelings if someone decided to take them away from me and told me I can't wear them anymore. Just imagine as a vanilla person if someone took away something you enjoyed like a hobby you have and told you you can never do it ever again? To get extreme, just imagine if someone took your kids away for no reason? I guess you can tell how much diapers mean to me and how important they are to me and how it feels if I couldn't do it ever again.

    I did get help with my desire to wear and all I did was buried it at the back of my brain but I still thought about them and went to the websites eventually. I lived in denial until I was 17 thinking I don't want to wear diapers and having no interest because I believed it was sick and twisted and no man would marry me for it. Me liking diapers never went away and I admit I did fine without them but once I started wearing them, I couldn't stop like I thought I would eventually if I met someone or have kids. It became like an addiction. Once you smoke a cigarette, you can't stop. Once you do drugs, you also can't stop so it's the same with diapers. But like I say, I like wearing them and don't intent to quit unless I lose interest like I have before and then the urges to wear would come back.

    Anyone else feel the same way?

  2. #2
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    es a paraphilia, which can be classified as a mental disorder if it meets the following criteria outlined in the DSM-IV (ICD-10 for countries outside the US & maybe canada... not sure bout canada... )

    "Paraphilias are defined by DSM-IV-TR as sexual disorders characterized by "recurrent, intense sexually arousing fantasies, sexual urges or behaviors generally involving (1) nonhuman objects, (2) the suffering or humiliation of oneself or one's partner, or (3) children or other nonconsenting persons that occur over a period of 6 months" (Criterion A), which "cause clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning" (Criterion B)."

    if ya wanna be technical, a lot of ABDLs want fit into criterion B, but some might... so, some of us would be dx'd with a 'philia, others would not... regardless, it is certainly a sexual deviancy i cannot take anyone who calls infantilism normal seriously... but perhaps only some infantilists (those who let it interfere with social, occupational, & other areas of life) would have it as a mental disorder...

  3. #3

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    I don't think I fit into that. But because diapers are classified as a sexual object, I guess yeah. Also if you have people who accept you for who you are and don't care that you wear them and have a supportive partner about it, you technically wouldn't fit it. Me wearing 24/7 doesn't effect me. I also don't get humiliated from this and no kids are involved. I guess if my son were embarrassed about me wearing them or my parents, then yeah I would meet that part I guess.

  4. #4

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    I suffer from bipolarII disorder and seasonal affective( I HATE THE WINTER MONTHS), and while I agree with the paraphilia diagnois,, I feel that abdl could also be a symptom of depression. I feel a lot better when wearing, than i do in underwear. Just a thought from someone who has some idea where I fit in.

  5. #5

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    Quote Originally Posted by junyour View Post
    I suffer from bipolarII disorder and seasonal affective( I HATE THE WINTER MONTHS), and while I agree with the paraphilia diagnois,, I feel that abdl could also be a symptom of depression. I feel a lot better when wearing, than i do in underwear. Just a thought from someone who has some idea where I fit in.

    That may be another new thread I can start. If any conditions can lead someone to being a AB/DL and if their AB/DLness could be part of that condition they have.

  6. #6

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    The idea of "mental illness" is really more of a social or behavioural concept, rather than something that's founded on "real" science.

    The DSM is based on the subjective opinion of "experts" (i.e. people interested in psychology and familiar with the way that people "work"). So... something is a "mental illness" if a lot of people who are interested in the mind think it should be. It's put to the vote. And naturally, expert opinion changes all the time. New "mental illnesses" are invented all the time! The first edition of the DSM was little more than a pamphlet by comparison to the weighty tome that it now is.

    Not so long ago, the DSM considered homosexuality to be a mental illness; now that idea seems preposterous!

    All "mental illness" really means is that the affected person has thoughts/feelings/behaviours, etc. which are considered "unacceptable", whether due to the suffering/problems/difficulties that the individual experiences directly, or simply that society (or the therapist in question) doesn't approve.

    So... in a way, "mental illness" doesn't really exist as a real "thing", it's just a really vague judgement that someone has made.

    That's not to say that depression, anxiety, OCD, autism or whatever don't exist -- clearly they do... But... every kind of label in psychology is just an opinion, not a scientific explanation of what is actually happening to your body.

    So... whether infantilism is a mental illness simply depends on someone else's opinion... And why would I care what someone else thinks (especially when they haven't experienced it themselves)? It's my own opinion that matters to me. But because I know what that experience is like, I don't need to resort to labels like "mental illness" or have to decide whether I'm more AB than DL or vice versa. It is what it is.

    TL;DR: Labels are just labels.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Calico View Post
    I don't think I fit into that. But because diapers are classified as a sexual object, I guess yeah. Also if you have people who accept you for who you are and don't care that you wear them and have a supportive partner about it, you technically wouldn't fit it. Me wearing 24/7 doesn't effect me. I also don't get humiliated from this and no kids are involved. I guess if my son were embarrassed about me wearing them or my parents, then yeah I would meet that part I guess.
    the suffering & humiliation part is meant to cover BDSM & variants of it, wherein suffering & humiliation can play a big role... and children & nonconsenting persons is meant to cover pedophilia, necrophilia, zoophilia, etc. if one derives sexual pleasure from infantilism, there is no question that it is a paraphilia (fancy word for saying "sexual deviancy")... it really is a question of whether it is a mental disorder (i.e., whether infantilism is interfering with one's life or not)...



    Quote Originally Posted by junyour View Post
    I suffer from bipolarII disorder and seasonal affective( I HATE THE WINTER MONTHS), and while I agree with the paraphilia diagnois,, I feel that abdl could also be a symptom of depression. I feel a lot better when wearing, than i do in underwear. Just a thought from someone who has some idea where I fit in.
    would speculate that perhaps sometimes depression can yield regression as a coping mechanism in a person (i.e., thumb-sucking, sleeping with a stuffed animal, etc), but i doubt it would yield such extreme behaviors as wearing diapers, baby clothes, etc... actually, i would guess that infantilism may often lead to depression in the infantilist, since infantilism is such a marginal condition & the person can feel like "no one will ever accept me" or "no one understands me" (this was probably more common before the advent of the internet)...



    Quote Originally Posted by tiny View Post
    The idea of "mental illness" is really more of a social or behavioural concept, rather than something that's founded on "real" science.

    The DSM is based on the subjective opinion of "experts" (i.e. people interested in psychology and familiar with the way that people "work"). So... something is a "mental illness" if a lot of people who are interested in the mind think it should be. It's put to the vote. And naturally, expert opinion changes all the time. New "mental illnesses" are invented all the time! The first edition of the DSM was little more than a pamphlet by comparison to the weighty tome that it now is.

    Not so long ago, the DSM considered homosexuality to be a mental illness; now that idea seems preposterous!

    All "mental illness" really means is that the affected person has thoughts/feelings/behaviours, etc. which are considered "unacceptable", whether due to the suffering/problems/difficulties that the individual experiences directly, or simply that society (or the therapist in question) doesn't approve.

    So... in a way, "mental illness" doesn't really exist as a real "thing", it's just a really vague judgement that someone has made.

    That's not to say that depression, anxiety, OCD, autism or whatever don't exist -- clearly they do... But... every kind of label in psychology is just an opinion, not a scientific explanation of what is actually happening to your body.

    So... whether infantilism is a mental illness simply depends on someone else's opinion... And why would I care what someone else thinks (especially when they haven't experienced it themselves)? It's my own opinion that matters to me. But because I know what that experience is like, I don't need to resort to labels like "mental illness" or have to decide whether I'm more AB than DL or vice versa. It is what it is.

    TL;DR: Labels are just labels.
    do not really like the postmodernist critiques, but will try to reply to this as best i can...

    you are correct... mental disorders are determined by experts in psychology (but who is more qualified than these people to determine this??? ) & sometimes these mental disorders can seem very arbitrary & evidence-lacking (a good example of this is the personality disorders, which i know quite a bit about after being dx'd & reading up on em -- they have been described as the most mishmashy of diagnostic categories in the DSM...aside from borderline & antisocial, they are lacking in research & are just categories of traits people have decided are detrimental for an individual &/or society...)

    also, some mental illnesses have much evidence (scientific, neurobiological evidence even) to account for em... i'm lookin @ you mood disorders & anxiety disorders!!!

    i think you have been to harsh on the discipline of psychopathology... yes, many of it is arbitrary, but not all of it... and even so, these people go to school for years, work with patients for years... they know quite a bit bout what theyre talkin bout... and to call it "vague judgments" & throw it in the trash like you just did is, in my opinion, anti-intellectual... & that is how i view postmodernism in general...

    (P.S. no personal offense intended... jus a healthy intellectual debate )

  8. #8

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    "i think you have been to harsh on the discipline of psychopathology... yes, many of it is arbitrary, but not all of it... and even so, these people go to school for years, work with patients for years... they know quite a bit bout what theyre talkin bout... and to call it "vague judgments" & throw it in the trash like you just did is, in my opinion, anti-intellectual... & that is how i view postmodernism in general... "

    Hmmm... I think Tiny was pretty clear that it was not arbitrary in all cases, and I dont think he was advocating for throwing the DSM into the trash, merely saying that the conditions listed there are often "contructs" as opposed to scientific facts. I think he would probably agree, as I would, that some conditions listed in the DSM are quantifiable and can be treated as fact(he listed Autism for example). I would say that his postion is not "anti-intellectual," because he is suggesting that we use critical thinking to navigate each situation in a unique way... this to me is ACTIVE intellectual thinking, and it takes a lot more of using yer noodle to do it. I've never heard the label "post-modern critique" applied to this discussion, but I take the term with a grain of salt. If the DSM has lost some credibility in the public eye, it is mostly because the dogmatic approach of some of it's authors has been embarrassing to watch at times (i.e. homosexuality). That being said, the DSM is a helpful tool because it helps us "frame" the therapeutic discussion, and put it in context... compare symptoms, etc. Like any tool, it all gets down to how you use it-- destroy or build.

    So back to the original discussion: I will only allow you to call your ABDL a "mental illness" if that will help you get to the place you need to go. If you are a baby, and everybody around you loves you as a baby, and you enjoy it, then do so. If you have wrecked your life with it, then you need to look at how others have overcome their problems, and learn from them. The DSM may be helpful, but so is this place

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