Maybe you are lucky enough not to have experienced what lingers after someone dies.
But for those that have, death of anyone relatively close sets an atmosphere where speech is sparse and smiles and laughter is not quite as common as normal. It doesn't even have to be someone that was close to you. It could even be someone that was close to a friend.
Yesterday, one of my friend's father died, and it was not so close to a peaceful type of death. This (Wednesday) morning was, simply grave. The usually noisy hallways were crowded, but everyone was solemn. It really did set a tone for the morning at one of where the IB (International Baccalaureate) kids congregated. The friend I was talking about is very well known, popular and social, and extremely smart.
Now if anyone wants to accuse me of making anything up, I do have news articles as well as social media streams to prove it, but I do feel that I have a responsibility to protect the privacy of the person(s) of interest.
Now my question is: have any of you experienced death- of family, friends, or anyone? Or have you tried to comfort someone who has experience such loss?
If you have, I would like to know how you think people that have experienced a loss think- how they deal with it.
I just feel lost for words and I feel helpless because I cannot say anything to help my (and many others') friend.
I already know that there are psychological stages we go through when we deal with grief- We deny it, we get angry at the injustice, we bargain for nothing, we become depressed, and, for some sooner than others, we start accepting what really happened and then finally continue on with our daily lives. Have any of you gone through these stages?
My experience with my grandmother's passing was of attempted ignorance, but since she was the first real mother to me, I simply couldn't deny it. And I will regret to this day that I was not by her death bed (though I am many time zones away). She was the loving old lady that spoiled me when I was young. I only visited her once after I left and she was in a miserable condition already. What was really sad though was that she spoke no English and I spoke a broken Chinese. Nonetheless, she was proud of me, how I have grown and how I have changed for the better.
Now back to the topic...
And how do you comfort someone so depressed, so broken and out of it? Again, I am lost for words and all I could say was "my condolences."
Any help is appreciated. Thank you in advance.