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Thread: How I do I play this?

  1. #1

    Default How I do I play this?

    Hey Guys,

    Bear with me my brain isnít 100% Ok so I met this girl Brittany on OKCupid, we talked for about a month before we decided to physically date. I think it worked out for the good this way. First meeting wasnít awkward at all, she even brought a friend and we mustíve talked for about 2 hours on my porch.

    Brittany confided in me when we first met that she has a very strained relationship with her parents. The mother is extremely judgmental of her because of the fact that she has tattoos, pierced lips and the fact that is bisexual.

    The mother also is very critical of her weight just because she weighs 250 pounds and Brittany weighs 100 and the mother still calls her fat! There is days she wonít eat a thing Iím worried that the mom will be even more judgmental of me because of the fact I am bound to a wheelchair primarily and push Brittany away from me.

    Another thing isÖ. How can I break the fact that Iím AB to her? Tell her now, wait, be a closet AB, or give it up? I donít want her thinking she has to take care of me and I donít her to have another reason to break it off with me.

  2. #2

    Default

    She's 100 pounds, and her mother is harassing her about her weight?! That's definite emotional abuse. Sounds like she's insecure about her own weight & taking it out on her daughter. 100 pounds is probably underweight. =\

  3. #3

    Default

    How old are you guys... If you are 18 then you could tell her mom to politely to shove it. Just try and be nice and don't lose your cool. Her mom will probably make an ass out of herself if you just stay level headed. Don't look like the bad guy and the girl will probably choose to believe you over her mother.

  4. #4

    Default

    I'd say to hold off on the AB stuff for a long while and work on creating a stable relationship. If it turns out that you two are good together, then you start getting into fetishes. (excuse my bluntness, but it's essentially what it is)

  5. #5

    Default

    If you and this girl get along great id leave it until you feel comfortable about telling her about your AB side so you dont put her of. Regarding the mother and being wheelchair bound remember it doesnt make you any different it there to help you and if the mother has problems with that she needs help and its between you and her daughter and she should keep her beak out so to speak

  6. #6

    Default

    Yeah, essentially, i'd hold off on what your needs are right now until you have a solution for hers. I agree on the statement above that she is going through emotional abuse. If she doesn't indicate that she recognizes the abuse, it might be very important to talk to her about it as straight forward as she will let you. If she doesn't trust you enough yet, or acts offended that you are bringing up the subject that her mother is mentally abusive and that she is actually under weight. Then I would really hope you can manage getting her to talk to a Councillor or psychologist to help her through it, because it is affecting her health and that is really not good. She needs to start eating meals regularly in my opinion, they don't have to be huge but there needs to be something.
    If you do manage to get her talking use what is called Active Listening, remember that she needs to solve her problem in her mind, you just need to be there to help her work through it. If you work with her and show your concern, and stand up for her in front of her mom while remaining the adult of the situation, you probably will win the girls heart hands down, regardless of your own disabilities and fetishes. Ultimately, you have reached a point of self acceptance, so now you just need to help her find that, because right now i'm sure she doesn't have it, but don't tell her that.


    As for the bi thing, Well i guess that is up to you to figure out. If it wasn't for my religious upbringing, i probably wouldn't care about it that much personally, for some reason it doesn't bother me, but if my family were to find out that my spouse was bi, then i'm sure some eyebrows would be raising off their sculls.

  7. #7

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Tyger View Post
    Yeah, essentially, i'd hold off on what your needs are right now until you have a solution for hers. I agree on the statement above that she is going through emotional abuse. If she doesn't indicate that she recognizes the abuse, it might be very important to talk to her about it as straight forward as she will let you. If she doesn't trust you enough yet, or acts offended that you are bringing up the subject that her mother is mentally abusive and that she is actually under weight. Then I would really hope you can manage getting her to talk to a Councillor or psychologist to help her through it, because it is affecting her health and that is really not good. She needs to start eating meals regularly in my opinion, they don't have to be huge but there needs to be something.
    If you do manage to get her talking use what is called Active Listening, remember that she needs to solve her problem in her mind, you just need to be there to help her work through it. If you work with her and show your concern, and stand up for her in front of her mom while remaining the adult of the situation, you probably will win the girls heart hands down, regardless of your own disabilities and fetishes. Ultimately, you have reached a point of self acceptance, so now you just need to help her find that, because right now i'm sure she doesn't have it, but don't tell her that.


    As for the bi thing, Well i guess that is up to you to figure out. If it wasn't for my religious upbringing, i probably wouldn't care about it that much personally, for some reason it doesn't bother me, but if my family were to find out that my spouse was bi, then i'm sure some eyebrows would be raising off their sculls.
    i don't have a problem with her being bi

  8. #8

    Default

    My first thought was the same as some of the others, that you don't have to tell about the baby side of things right away. Since you are incontinent, she must know you wear diapers I'm assuming? That will be your starting point, but somewhere down the road. Try to befriend the mother and get to know your girlfriend a bit more. You can ease into infantilism by small degrees. There are other aspects to what we do. Buy your girl a plushie and tell her you like them too, etc. There's always a gentle work around.

  9. #9

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    My first thought was the same as some of the others, that you don't have to tell about the baby side of things right away. Since you are incontinent, she must know you wear diapers I'm assuming? That will be your starting point, but somewhere down the road. Try to befriend the mother and get to know your girlfriend a bit more. You can ease into infantilism by small degrees. There are other aspects to what we do. Buy your girl a plushie and tell her you like them too, etc. There's always a gentle work around.
    im semi IC, she has no idea
    Last edited by goodnightmoon92; 28-Aug-2012 at 04:37. Reason: dupe

  10. #10

    Default

    That changes things, but don't give up. I like my work around idea with the plushie.

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