So to be clear this is not my actual mother. I know that sounds a little stupid but I have had people ask before.
So it has been a long time since I have come to the community for advice, but here goes nothing.
My fiance (I call her Mommy) is puzzling me, but I am a guy, so just when I think I have her figured out she drops something new on me. Anyway, our relationship is best described as a switch AB relationship with each of us taking care of each other. She takes care of me like her Baby boy, and I love the sweetest little girl in the world when she wants her Daddy. So whats the trouble in paradise you ask?
Well lately she has been under a lot of stress (not from me) I have tried to help her cope with it and remain sane through it all. It seems the clouds have passed now though, and we can get back to something of a normal routine. While she was so stressed we experienced something of a dry spell when it came to AB fun and games. I tried a couple times to put her in diapers, give her a pacifier, put diapers on and regress near her, tried getting her to watch ponyo (one of our favorite movies to watch together), making her her favorite lunch and trying to feed it to her. No dice.
However, since the period of stress is over I expected her to want the things she used to. Somehow not so much. She reluctantly agreed to change me and play with me before work today, and she seems to deliberately avoid allowing me to baby her. She never wants to talk about AB stuff anymore, even though she claims she does. She says she is just as interested in taking care of me and all things AB related, but her actions are telling me otherwise. (she did once openly admit that it felt like a chore sometimes)
So do I trust my fiance,and believe what she is telling me? Or should I look at the way she is acting to determing her true feelings? Even if she didn't like AB stuff anymore I would still love her. I am just concerned that if he got tired of being an AB and a caretaker, how long until she gets tired of me too?
I have been an AB/TB since I was 5. I didn't really accept it until last year but its part of who I am. Accepting it has made me a stronger person and I don't want to go back to hating myself trying to get rid of it, but don't want to loose her either.
The lack of attention from the person I call my caretaker has me feeling neglected and sad. Losing her won't fix it. I don't know what I should do right now.