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Thread: NOT being able to go, 'Paruresis', 'Bashful Bladder' 'Bathroom Phobia'

  1. #1

    Default NOT being able to go, 'Paruresis', 'Bashful Bladder' 'Bathroom Phobia'

    Curiosiity's got my goat today.

    For as long as I can remember, I've always had a bit of a struggle 'psyching up' or 'unlocking' to pee. I've always been a 'go when you feel the urge' and not worry about when or how often type for the other.

    My steel bladder can usually go for 6-8 hours normally, though that is less than my personal record.

    This is a little opposite of diaper usage, which is no worries, no psyching, etc.

    I've also usually avoided 'non-familiar' bathrooms unless of a medium-high to dire need is present. Partly due to the 'Gas-Station-Bathroom Steriotype'.

    I've also been reading on the IC section that some are curious as to weather holding out too long can weaken things and cause IC.

    Incidentally, I've found that when I'm padded, and in private, that peeing is a
    *LOT* more spontaneous, and I've had a couple of experiences when I was relatively recently re-accquainting myself and diapers where I *ALMOST* didn't notice I was peeing. I still won't pee in public (around others), even though I might be getting the 'extremely full signal'.

    I do occasionaly wear under clothing in public places, and have *rarely* wet in public places while alone.

    So, I'm wondering, does anyone else feel this way?

    I was debating as to whether this is more of an 'IC' topic or not, but it's not
    'IC' unles NOT being able to go at any time when needed is also considered 'IC'

    so, questions:

    1.) anyone here 'shy' around bathrooms
    (grown-up version of potty phobia?)

    2.) anyone gotten IC as a result of being 'shy' or unable to use public restrooms over time?

    3.) anyone have insight into a similar situation?

  2. #2


    Awnsers to the questions:
    1) I can pee at anyones house. I just can only do #2 when I am at my own place, because I am very shy to do it somewhere else.
    2)Nope. And I dont know anyone who has.
    3) No.

  3. #3


    I wouldn't say I'm shy around bathrooms but I don't welcome other people hearing me poop. In a public bathroom it's not that bad and I'm not going to stop of someone comes in but it is a little bit aquard. I will try to wait if it's a personal residence though. Idk if that's what your talking about but I would assume most people experience what I described to one degree or another.

  4. #4


    I used to have the worst shy bladder - if I could even hear anyone else, it was just about impossible to pee. Oddly, once I started wearing diapers (occasionally), I found it easier to pee in a public washroom. I actually visualize myself wearing a diaper while I'm at the urinal, and I can pee easily.

    And it seems unlikely that you'd go IC due to fear of public washrooms, but maybe an IC member can prove/disprove this. I also find myself peeing more naturally when I'm diapered. Thankfully, this doesn't continue when I'm dressed normally!

  5. #5


    I have a really bad shy bladder. I ALWAYS have to use a stall and if I think people are waiting on me it makes it impossible. I also really can't over think things or I'll lock up. Its a huge embarrassment for me sometimes but my friends and family are pretty cool with it mostly, except for the occasional "why do you use the stall" and "what took you so long" question. As for wearing a diaper it's a little easier but not a huge amount.

  6. #6


    It's funny but this thread comes up from time to time, and I'm always surprised how many of us have trouble peeing in public bathrooms. I am one such person. It really started by the time I was in college, but I don't recall using the bathroom very much in high school either. I loath public bathrooms now, and I have to use a stall if we're on a long trip. I can't use a urinal, because I will just stand there with nothing happening. It's so embarrassing, and I think the fear of being embarrassed is a contributor.

  7. #7


    Here's the last one I started.
    My issue has always been privicy. One bowl, locked room I'm OK but open stalls with others beside me and it's no-go!

  8. #8


    Here is a quick fix... Just relax your bladder. Don't even think about it. Eventually it will happen. Relax...

  9. #9


    I'll chime in with the usual "me too". I've used this as a minor justification for my diaper wearing. I was ok using the toilet away from home as long as there was privacy, but had a very hard time getting going in a public restroom unless it was just me in there. Urinals were out of the question most of the time, especially if there was someone else there or arriving. Really embarassing to just stand there unable to do anything while someone else walks in, does his business, washes and leaves. Or if I managed to get started, the instant someone opened the door I'd lock up like a rock until they'd left, and that would leave me standing there pulled out and ready but doing nothing, the entire time they were there - all I could think about was "he must have thought there was something wrong with me."

    Anyway, I found the same difficulty with wetting my diaper. But unlike public restrooms, I had all the opportunities and patience to practice my control at home in my diapers. Laying down on my back on my bed was completely out of the question when I first started stocking diapers. But over the course of several months I was able to regain control over my bladder. "diaper therapy" you could say After a week or two I was able to wet a little with great difficulty, and over time it got much easier. I can now use a public urinal (although with difficulty) in company, and I'm very thankful for that. I'm certain the diapers helped the process.

    I think the reason I got this way to begin with was that I just didn't have frequent occasions to go while in company. I never went out for any sports where there were locker rooms, I rarely if ever used urinals even when alone. I very rarely used the school restrooms at all actually. I really didn't like anyone seeing me even in my underwear to start with during my brief time on the wrestling team. But I've been able to get over most of that just with patience and persistence. I'm confident you can get the same results with the same two ingredients.

    But on the plus side, having such a shy bladder tends to give you a great capacity! A guy I work with, younger than me, we joke he has a bladder the size of a walnut, he's in there at least four times a day. Me, once if at all.

  10. #10


    Quote Originally Posted by Nam Repaid View Post

    Yeah, I'm this way too. I can usually take care of business if I've got one empty urinal stall between myself and any other pee-ers, but if somebody jumps in right beside me, it's all over.

    By the way, if anybody here hasn't seen the Urinal Game, it's mildly amusing. Every female should play it so that they understand the horrifying social pressures of the Men's Room.

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