I have been wondering for a while now about how long diapers had been sexual for me. I didn't even realize they were for me until I was 21 when I was told it by my ex.
I have thought of things about myself that I noticed:
In high school I no longer felt comfortable looking at kids in diapers and wanting to see them get their diapers changed, it felt too creepy and perverted so I lost interest in them. Back then I just figured it was because I looked like an adult now and was nearing adulthood so of course it be creepy now to watch them get changed or to stare at their butts or bottoms. As a kid it was more acceptable but I was a teen now that looked like an adult.
I didn't want my parents changing me or babying me and I felt this way in high school. It just felt too creepy even though part of me wanted it. Plus I had brothers and it just feel too creepy if they saw their sister get babied by their parents.
Whenever I look up diapers online when I was about 18 or 19, I get this ticklish excited feeling inside me. Especially when I imagine myself peeing in them.
Are these hints here that diapers became sexual even when I was in high school? What about the baby stuff too? What about me not wanting to be a baby in front of my kids nor go out in public like that? Is that a hint that it's also sexual for me?