Hi guys! Nornmally I would never post something of this nature for all to see but I consider myself to be in good company and I really need to get some things off my chest and seek some advice. I need some advice from married couples of anyone that has had sexual problems in this past relationships.
Here's some background: my hubby and I have been married a little over a year now and we met about 6 years ago. At the time I was in high school and needless to say sex wasnt really an issue for us....it just happned and things were fine. He was happy, I was happy....all was well. About two years later we got into church and felt that us having sex before marriage was wrong, so we stopped. We dated for the next couple of years and though we tried hard to stay pure (please no negative comments on this) we would occasinaly get carried away in passion. We always talked about how nice it would be when we didnt have to worry about feeling guilty about doing those things. So last year we got maried and I thought "Finally!" but it was far from normal. It was very infrequent and when we did do it, my husband didnt seem to get much from it. As time has gone on it has gotten worse and worse.....it has now been months. Of all the time times that we have done it in our marriage I have always been the one to start it. Never him. Now I have been turned down so many times that I dont even want to try, knowing before I do I will fail. I have tried everything and he never seems to want it. We have talked about it more times that I can count but it always ends in a fight. He says that he cant explain it, he;s just not in the mood. The last time I brought it up he said he wished I would just leave it alone.....I dont plan on saying much else to him. He doesnt want to make an effort....and it hurts. He's fine with things the way they are and sees nothing wrong with it. But I do....partners are supposed to mutally meet each others needs and I feel completly ignored. Dont get me wrong he;s great; does things for me, is geniaully sweet and tolerant of what he knows of my little side. And while he always says I'm beautful, I dont feel it at all when he doesnt even let me touch him. I think about it constantly and I feel myself doing things I dont like; thinking things I shouldnt and looking at things I know are wrong on the internet. I dont want to be this way.....I want to have this relationship with my husband. I am beginning to wonder what will happen if five years from now it remains the same as it is now....how much my resentment will build up and how this will also affect our ability to have a family one day (which we both want kids). If you have read all this, thank you. I need some advice for what I should do since talking doesnt seem t help; we have the same conversation over and over again and somehow I'm always in the wrong. Thanks for listening guys....this is really emabrrasing for me to share and I'm sorry if we arent supposed to discuss this sort of thing on here.