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Thread: Need some advice - wife willing, but unable to communicate what I want!

  1. #1

    Default Need some advice - wife willing, but unable to communicate what I want!

    Hi everyone,

    It has been quite a while since I last started a thread, it is nice to be back! Anyway on to the topic..

    My wife and I have been together for 6 years now (though only married for 1). I told her about my diaper fetish very early on, possibly too soon. She had trouble accepting it for some time but she eventually came around. She is cool with me wearing whenever I want with the exception of being around certain friends. She is a pediatrician with the Air Force and many of her friends are as well, and I suppose she thinks it would be easy to spot. Otherwise I have free reign to wear to bed, during the day, whenever and wherever.

    My wife also wears for me and has done so maybe 4 or 5 times in the past. She doesn't mind at all and enjoys the feeling to an extent, not as much as me of course. I love when she wears for me and she has offered tons of times to do so.

    Now here is my issue: I am way more uncomfortable talking about it with her and discussing what I want than she is. She wants us to have open and honest discussions about my feelings towards the diapers and how to incorporate them into our lives.

    I just don't know how to communicate all this with her. She is amazing for being so understanding and supportive and she is really trying hard to make me feel comfortable, I just feel like it is so hard to talk about with anyone. I spent so much time and energy hiding it all my life that I can't imagine talking about it in depth, let alone sharing it with her. To this day I get uncomfortable when she sees me in a diaper, its ok if its under pajamas or clothes but not in a diaper by itself.

    So my question is, what is the best way to communicate my thoughts/feelings on how we can incorporate this into our life together without me clamming up from being embarrassed? I can't even say the word "diaper" to her yet lol. We call it protection!

    Thanks to everyone for reading through this long post, appreciate any and all feedback!

  2. #2


    Honestly just be yourself and spit it out, since she is so willing you are in no way of failing lol that's what I did with my wife lol I use to be able to say it either :P we called it being "comfortable" lol

  3. #3


    Have you tried talking about it in front of a mirror? I realize you're still alone but it might take some of the stress off if you rehearse and have an audience so to speak. Talking about this is pretty hard for some of us. My experience is just with other ABDLs and it can be hard enough to get into that stuff in person when it's appropriate. On the plus side, you've got a six year relationship to fall back on in terms of communication. Let your wife help you.

  4. #4


    Being a wife of an Ab, I can say this, it would be easier if you just told her what you wanted. If she is willing to do whatever you want, then take that as a privilege. Just tell her

  5. #5


    Yes, really, you're very lucky. I've been expressing myself more to my wife, but like you, I'm somewhat reluctant. Take it in small steps, which is what I've done. The other night I drank from my baby bottle in front of her for the first time. I've had it for several years. She noticed it and almost yelled, "Is that a baby bottle?!" and then she laughed. After that though, she was cool about it, so now I've crossed that hurtle.

    When I had shingles last year, she bought me a night shirt, so I could wear that to bed with less skin irritation. When I got over the shingles, I started wearing diapers under it. The night shirt is fairly short, so the diapers showed significantly. Really, this was more my problem than hers, but now I can go to bed in just a shirt and diapers. So, I've taken it in small steps, and I believe this might be a good way for you to begin.

    I've also introduced a little more baby talk, and acted a little more childish. She's written some funny notes and put them in my lunch, with little rhymes of how she loves me, and a line which will rhyme with diaper. So we are taking small steps, and reaching a very nice infantile place.

  6. #6


    Thanks everyone for the input. I think there is something to be said for sucking it up and just coming out with it, I just know I'm going to sound a bit silly since I've never had to articulate any of this before.

    On the other hand I do know that we will be taking it slow either way as I'm not sure either one of us is ready to jump in 100% day one.

    Thanks for the encouragement! And believe me I know how lucky I am and I appreciate having such a wonderful partner

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