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Thread: Diaper/Regression fetish (paraphilia or not)

  1. #1

    Default Diaper/Regression fetish (paraphilia or not)

    As stated by Wikipedia:



    If a sexual fetish causes significant psychosocial distress for the person or has detrimental effects on important areas of their life, it is diagnosable as a paraphilia in the DSM and the ICD.[2] Many people embrace their fetish rather than attempting treatment to rid themselves of it.

    Psychologists and medical practitioners regard fetishism as normal variations of human sexuality[citation needed]. Even those orientations that are potential forms of fetishism are usually considered unobjectionable as long as all people involved feel comfortable. Only if the diagnostic criteria presented in detail below are met is the medical diagnosis of fetishism justified. The leading criterion is that a fetishist is ill only if he or she suffers from the addiction, not simply because of the addiction itself.
    So if we are capable of keeping infantilism from public display, would that put this into not being a paraphilia? Most people look at fetishes as being normal and healthy so long as nobody gets hurt, and everyone involved feels comfortable. But if "significant psychosocial distress" is the qualifying factor of a paraphilia, then i have one, because I am going nuts with the stress caused socially by my parents, councilors, and religion. If these three factors were excluded then i wouldn't be experiencing stress.

    Should the previous factors be included in the definition of an un-healthy fetish?

  2. #2

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tyger View Post
    As stated by Wikipedia:



    So if we are capable of keeping infantilism from public display, would that put this into not being a paraphilia? Most people look at fetishes as being normal and healthy so long as nobody gets hurt, and everyone involved feels comfortable. But if "significant psychosocial distress" is the qualifying factor of a paraphilia, then i have one, because I am going nuts with the stress caused socially by my parents, councilors, and religion. If these three factors were excluded then i wouldn't be experiencing stress.

    Should the previous factors be included in the definition of an un-healthy fetish?
    Relax my dear friend, here's a paci:

    If it is the ABDL/Furry was directly causing detrimental effects in your life, then it is a problem, not because of the ABDL/Furry itself but because of how it affects your behavior. Also, you cannot argue that the ABDL/Furry is a disease just because there is a high degree of social resistance towards it. Otherwise, someone would argue that being attracted to the same sex is a mental condition just because there is a high degree of social intollerance towards it.

    I myself am a Saved Christian and am very comfortable that my fettish or its practice in no way offends God unless I let it a) become a God or b) hurt my relationship with my wife, c) cause endangerment towards myself and others, or d) fail to keep it discrete. My definition of endangerment towards myself does not include urinating myself because the worst effect is skin irritation, which isn't much more than the mild dangers associated with regular vanilla sex with a married partner. Urine is sterile when fresh. In terms of DL sexuality, we were wired this way. In terms of AB or Furry, sexual or otherwise, we were wired this way. In God's eye, we are fearfully and wonderfully made.

    Most Shrinks agree that the medical journal's definition of "Pariphilia" is objectionably broad because it includes, among other things, "pedophilia" which is the absolutely most distastefully offensive sterotype of ABDLs. 99.99999999999999999% of ABDLs cringe at the thought of a pedo trolling around our sites and we would be the very first people to snitch them out to the feds (or UK/International equivalent authorities).

    My advise is, as long as you can hide from parents and room mates, enjoy.

    Your Friend among friends,
    HokieABDL

    P. S. You are in a much better position discovering that you are not alone than I was at your age. Look at my Join Date. That was the date I discoverred what I had actually had a name and I wasn't a pedo or psycho.

    ---------- Post added at 18:06 ---------- Previous post was at 18:02 ----------

    p.s.s. What do those "counsilors" say about you?

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by HokieABDL View Post
    Relax my dear friend, here's a paci:


    My advise is, as long as you can hide from parents and room mates, enjoy.

    Your Friend among friends,
    HokieABDL

    P. S. You are in a much better position discovering that you are not alone than I was at your age. Look at my Join Date. That was the date I discoverred what I had actually had a name and I wasn't a pedo or psycho.

    ---------- Post added at 18:06 ---------- Previous post was at 18:02 ----------

    p.s.s. What do those "counsilors" say about you?

    Thanks for the paci, i could use one. Well the psychologist tried making his point straight forward the first time, and since then he learned that was not the right way to approach it. Now he is going over other things while making sure that i keep in mind my infantilism. I know that he wants me to make connections between that and other things, basically the message i get from him is that infantilism is a form of selfish action and that it is wrong two want others (most specifically future wife) to be involved in it.
    My religious leader said directly that if i continue wearing diapers and sucking on paci's that it will ruin my life. And my parents don't say too much about it, but i know that they think that I will end up working my way out of it. Every time i give my mom a hug i feel like she is trying to squeeze the infant out of me, and out of all honesty, it is driving me nuts, so much that i kind of dread giving her a hug unless it is a nice short one, then i'm ok with it.
    In my mind set right now, i've decided that i gave their advice a chance (not that i haven't already done what they advised on my own) and it just isn't working out, so i'm going back to my own conclusions. But dang it all that the whole process caused me to trash my nuk 5 and $40 of teddies.

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tyger View Post
    Thanks for the paci, i could use one. Well the psychologist tried making his point straight forward the first time, and since then he learned that was not the right way to approach it. Now he is going over other things while making sure that i keep in mind my infantilism. I know that he wants me to make connections between that and other things, basically the message i get from him is that infantilism is a form of selfish action and that it is wrong two want others (most specifically future wife) to be involved in it.
    My religious leader said directly that if i continue wearing diapers and sucking on paci's that it will ruin my life. And my parents don't say too much about it, but i know that they think that I will end up working my way out of it. Every time i give my mom a hug i feel like she is trying to squeeze the infant out of me, and out of all honesty, it is driving me nuts, so much that i kind of dread giving her a hug unless it is a nice short one, then i'm ok with it.
    In my mind set right now, i've decided that i gave their advice a chance (not that i haven't already done what they advised on my own) and it just isn't working out, so i'm going back to my own conclusions. But dang it all that the whole process caused me to trash my nuk 5 and $40 of teddies.
    Sounds like the purge/binge we all go through. DLs and ABs alike. It won't ruin your life if you let God be God and not it. Addictions and compulsions ruin your life, not this. I don't know your shrink but I don't think he is saying you are selfish for being who you are. He might just be warning you to just accept that you may never have a wife become your caretaking "mommy" which is okay. My wife is not a "mommy" to me and I am okay with it (though my AB is more the fettish-type than the all-out regressive type). Some ABs have mommy/daddies and some don't. Some ABs have or have had mommies/daddies but the boyfreind-girlfriend husband-wife part of it failed, so the whole thing did. Some ABs have non-mommeis/non-daddies who they absolutely love and adore them and have a life-long relationship even without the participation in the AB lifestyle. I know it's hard but trust me: The latter is much better than the former. I would never trade my non-participating wife for the world. Some ABDLs have a participating mommy/daddy who will always be their husband/wife and for those lucky ones I reccommend: Rosalie Bent's "There's a Baby In My Bed" and say God Bless them!

    The most importent thing is compatibility. When you get settled on your own I always reccommend eharmoney.com. That's where I met my non-ABDL non-CT bride. Just make sure you tell them after a few dates if things between you suggest that they will be serious and tell her to just give you enough space to baby yourself once in a while if the relationship becomes permanent. Try not to expect or even beg her to participate. Settle for her acceptance and tollerance. If you are lucky to have a participant God Bless You!

    I'd probably tell your parents right up to face the music, this is how you are, and you can't change even if you yourself tried, and you aren't the only one.
    Last edited by HokieABDL; 07-May-2012 at 01:53. Reason: misspell

  5. #5

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    I have to agree with HokieABDL. I wouldn't worry about how your diaper desires fit into definitions such as Paraphilia. Paraphilia is just a catch all for a large number of fetishes, and for those reasons, must make some generalizations to include them under that large of an umbrella. I'm more concerned with your therapist's attitude. You most certainly can live a reasonably normal life with this desire. I have, and now I'm a grandfather with several grandchildren.

    I got married shortly out of college and started my family. I refrained from practicing for a few years, but eventually it demanded my attention. I wore on my days off for years until I got discovered by my wife. She was very accepting and now I can further express my "little" self. My point is that there are women, or whomever, who will accept you. They may not participate, but if someone loves you and sees that they want to spend their life with you. you can work out ways that you will both find some satisfaction.

    Your minister may be a hard nosed bigot. I don't know him so I can't judge, but I've learned to not take every minister seriously. That said, I do believe in God, and like HokieABDL said, we are fearfully and wonderfully made. God cares about your capacity to love others, to be generous and helpful. That's really the hard road, not to wear or not wearing diapers. No one is without sin. Jesus knew that only too well. We all live in glass houses, so don't let that aspect of loving diapers get you down. Maybe your minister should attend to the mite or log which is in his eye.

    Living as a diaper lover is always about balance. Like Hokie said, don't let it be your God. Don't let it run your life. Enjoy it when it calls, and when it's practical, wearing when it doesn't impinge on others and insult their sensibilities. It's why we keep it behind closed doors, and though that may not be a perfect solution, it makes us acceptable to others, or it should. If not, then they have bigger sins to live with than we do.

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    Living as a diaper lover is always about balance. Like Hokie said, don't let it be your God. Don't let it run your life. Enjoy it when it calls, and when it's practical, wearing when it doesn't impinge on others and insult their sensibilities. It's why we keep it behind closed doors, and though that may not be a perfect solution, it makes us acceptable to others, or it should. If not, then they have bigger sins to live with than we do.
    Thanks, that helps. I have felt so good about the idea of finding and keeping balance, but when i decided i'd be a bit open about the subject, a lot of it all went wrong. I have a friend who i told first though and he was extremely excepting of it, i think he is the only one who has managed to keep me sane.
    My psychologist has never worked with or herd of infantilism before, so that made it interesting too.
    And i have a lot of respect toward my minister but he seems to get a little affected by abnormal situations. And i don't think he took the time he had said he would to take a look into what i was going through, i understand he is busy though, but still.
    It seems funny to me sometimes how minimal a situation this really is, but how dramatic it seems to have become.

    ---------- Post added at 23:13 ---------- Previous post was at 23:11 ----------



    Quote Originally Posted by HokieABDL View Post
    The most importent thing is compatibility. When you get settled on your own I always reccommend eharmoney.com. That's where I met my non-ABDL non-CT bride. Just make sure you tell them after a few dates if things between you suggest that they will be serious and tell her to just give you enough space to baby yourself once in a while if the relationship becomes permanent. Try not to expect or even beg her to participate. Settle for her acceptance and tollerance. If you are lucky to have a participant God Bless You!

    I'd probably tell your parents right up to face the music, this is how you are, and you can't change even if you yourself tried, and you aren't the only one.
    Thanks a bunch. I'll give eharmoney a look. Yeah, i'm going to try not to expect too much from my partner, but it would be nice if she were to participate a bit, at least if she understands me though, then i'll be happy.

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tyger View Post
    It seems funny to me sometimes how minimal a situation this really is, but how dramatic it seems to have become.

    ---------- Post added at 23:13 ---------- Previous post was at 23:11 ----------

    Well, you've hit the nail on the head. In the big picture, it is minimal. If you know and understand that, you will do alright. Great attitude, and one that will keep you emotionally healthy over this. For most of us, enjoying diapers is only a part of who we are. It may often be on our minds, but really, it's a small part of our lives. It's what you do with the rest of your life that counts.

  8. #8

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    What more can I say than what has already been said: I believe Hokie and dogboy both have the right idea. Balance is very important in the AB/DL world. I believe that God would not want us to go through life regressing more than growing. As for what your religious leader said, It could very well go hand in hand with finding balance. Very rarely do any ABs or DLs find themselves living the exact AB/DL life we all day dream about from time to time. And to be constantely thinking about it and yearning for it, we'll end up driving ourselves insane when we keep trying to make it a reality and it keeps falling apart. In that sense, your life-- and the life of many AB/DLs, mine included, could be ruined. I don't want to beat a dead horse from what has been said so I'll stop here. But I do hope the stress doesn't get to you too much.

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