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Thread: Do you think it's wrong to keep your ab/dl stuff a secret from you girlfriend or wife

  1. #1

    Default Do you think it's wrong to keep your ab/dl stuff a secret from you girlfriend or wife

    Do you think it's wrong to keep your ab/dl stuff a secret from you girlfriend or wife

  2. #2


    It depends. I should don't hide something like this.

    Sent from my GT-I9100 using Tapatalk

  3. #3


    I think its better to tell them.
    Chances are they will find out eventually unless you completely give it up.

    I would think it would be better if you said something than if they found out themselves.
    Also if you got married and still have it hidden might be a problem.

    Tho it depends on each individual, how they would react. I would say be truthful.
    If its like a early time for a girlfriend, like barely going out, maybe hold it for a short time.

  4. #4


    I wouldn't want to tell them at first, but after awhile I would. I think that once you live with your girlfriend or boyfriend it is time for them to know (should probably tell them before they move in). My bf knows, but hes an ab too, so it wasn't that hard to tell him, especially since he knew before we officially started dating.

  5. #5


    Boyfriend/girlfriend: I think it's ok to keep from. That's a really big secret and I don't think it particularly needs to be shared with anyone until a special connection is made.

    Husband/wife: that's totally different. I'm guessing that if you get married you really REALLY love each other. A secret like that should be told before that big of a commitment is made. That way if one significant other disagreed, they still have a way out before things get too serIous.

  6. #6


    I didn't tell my girlfriend until we had been dating for around 6 months. I am so glad i did though, because she involves herself in my DL lifestyle now and its great! We've been together for a little over three years.
    Now i will say, there comes some issues with this at times such as jealousy. Just be sure to spread enough time with her without diapers so they feel important like they should be!

  7. #7


    Keeping secrets from significant others at times can be risky. They always say "the only thing worse than the crime is the coverup." Before things get to serious or someone gets hurt, I would tell her.

  8. #8


    I would say so... This is why I decided to tell my partner a few months back. It wasn't an easy decision, but I felt I was lying to him by not telling and wanted to come clean. Luckily it went well, but I think it's not been the same for some others. There are quite a few positive stories on ADISC but a few negative ones too.

    Good luck whatever your decision may be.

    Edit: I'd echo the point that it depends on the seriousness on the relation... I was together with my partner for over 12 years.
    Last edited by AlexFox; 23-Mar-2012 at 21:17.

  9. #9


    Once you start thinking of living together or getting engaged you should tell. Before then use discresion.

  10. #10


    I think that there is probably a time and a place for it. I don't think that you really want to carry secrets like that with you for too long, especially if you get engaged and are going to get married. But I wouldn't tell a girl about it too early because you don't want to scare them away and freak them out.

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