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Thread: Being Gay: A Choice or by Birth?

  1. #1

    Default Being Gay: A Choice or by Birth?

    Now, I have always believed you were born gay, and you didn't "become" gay. But honestly, thinking about it, I have no idea. I admit, I'm ignorant on the subject. I'd like to hear from some of the gay members of ADISC and get their thoughts (Not excluding the straight members at all, of course. But...well, it just seems like the gay members would be the ones to know).

  2. #2

    Default

    As being Gay myself, and basing it on my own thoughts and feelings. I think it's a combination of Nature and Nurture.

    I think you're born Homosexual to an extent. i think It comes down to your parents raising you though. If your parents from the get go raised you to think that gay people need to be shot in the head, you'd think that it was the right thing to do, and you wouldn't be.

    The best argument though, in my mind is this. (And i'll use myself as an example)

    Why would i choose a "lifestyle" where everything is difficult? I can't get married. I Can't have children of my own with the person i love. I can't act lovingly towards my boyfriend. My boyfriend can't be openly gay, because of his workplace.

    Why would i choose to be this way?

    If i could choose to be straight, would i? Honestly, Yes. Don't get me wrong, I Love my boyfriend with all my heart, and i'm so thankful to be with him. But if things were different, i'd choose to be attracted to girls.

  3. #3

    Default

    I think it's something that mostly develops while growing up, with a bit of environmental conditioning, and possibly some innate predisposition. But I don't think people are "born" gay or straight, because if that was the case it would be something genetic (meaning that cloning a gay guy you would be 100% sure to obtain another gay guy).

    In my case, until my late teens I was into girls, then at a certain point I started noticing that boys were more, uhm, interesting

  4. #4

    Default

    It's the whole nature verse nurture debate

    For me the answer doesn't really matter If some one's Gay that's fine if they're Straight that's fine and if they're something else then that's perfectly normal too.

    In all honestly it's unlikely to be entirely genetic, because if it was then it would have been quashed by evolution, as anything but Heterosexual intercourse results in no propagation of our species.

    If it is entirely based on the way people are brought up there would be families where all the children are gay and all though that does happen it doesn't appear to be more than random chance. Parents with both 'normal' and 'different'* children happen frequently so nurture is probably not the only factor either.

    There are even identical twins raised in identical environments that end up wildly dissimilar.

    There may be a predisposition one way or another thanks to genetics and the way people are brought up but that doesn't mean that either of them are the deciding factor. Research has been done and is being done but so far as I know no one has come up with a definitive answer.

    * I used 'normal' and 'different' because the sentence holds true for almost anything, being a girly girl vs a tom boy, or hetero vs homo, not liking diapers vs DL

  5. #5

    Default

    I believe sexuality to be an individualized thing. Modern society tries to put a label on everything, but the ancients - Greeks, Romans, Ottoman Empire, etc - had homosexuality, bisexuality, pansexuality, but didn't bother labeling them; it was just accepted as nature. (Correct me if I'm wrong on this.)

    As for "choice," well: if it really was a choice, why didn't all of those poor kids who committed suicide "chose" not to be gay? Apparently, they didn't believe they had a choice.

  6. #6

    Default

    I should...probably correct myself before I look like I know absolutely nothing on the subject.

    I know each person is different, and has different attractions. I guess my question is why, what makes each person tick?

    ...if that makes any sense.

  7. #7

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Possibly Insane View Post
    I believe sexuality to be an individualized thing. Modern society tries to put a label on everything, but the ancients - Greeks, Romans, Ottoman Empire, etc - had homosexuality, bisexuality, pansexuality, but didn't bother labeling them; it was just accepted as nature.
    Very well said. I've always been against labels myself, and if someone asks me if I'm gay I truthfully answer "no", because that's just one of many stereotypical labels which don't keep into account that everyone of us has unique views and tastes. Using labels probably makes things simpler in someone's eyes, but flattens out the myriad of shades that make us individuals and make the discovery of other people's personality such a fascinating and rewarding experience.

  8. #8

    Default

    There are indications that there are genetic tendencies toward attraction to the same sex, just as some people lean towards addictive behaviour. Eventually the details of that will be sorted out as the science of genetics advances.

    That said, homosexual behaviour, like heterosexual behaviour, or anything else we do, is a choice.

  9. #9

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by quattrus View Post
    Very well said. I've always been against labels myself, and if someone asks me if I'm gay I truthfully answer "no", because that's just one of many stereotypical labels which don't keep into account that everyone of us has unique views and tastes. Using labels probably makes things simpler in someone's eyes, but flattens out the myriad of shades that make us individuals and make the discovery of other people's personality such a fascinating and rewarding experience.
    Both you and Possibly Insane make very good points. I didn't even think about the fact that sexuality isn't just black and white, and is in fact a broad spectrum. Derp on my part. I've argued that very detail before with someone. Thanks for the responses .

  10. #10
    Butterfly Mage

    Default

    I knew I was attracted to members of the same gender when I was 12. It was not an option I chose.

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