I'd like to introduce myself. I will warn you that my intro. story is long, and contains some PG-13 material.
My childhood sucked. I was an only child, but I wasn't the stereotypical (read: spoiled) only child. MY parents were neglectful, and occasionally beat me. I wanted a little sister more than anything. I wanted to play dollies, play dress-up and just have someone to talk to. I would often cry myself to sleep. I made a vow to myself that I wanted to become a daddy with a big, warm, loving family when I grew up. One of my friends was in a family of 7, and I wished I could join her family.
I was also bullied in school. I found the AB/TB/DL community over 10 years ago. I had fantasies about wearing diapers. This was around the time of puberty, so I discovered erections, masturbation and ejaculation through this community. However, I never got my hands on diapers. The closest thing that I had were baby wipes. My mom used them to clean. I would sneak into the bathroom, masturbate on one, and lick my juice.
In the last few months, my cousins, neighbors and family friends have gotten married and started families. I cannot log onto Facebook without seeing pictures of loving families and hearing stories about how wonderful children are. I become jealous, angry, bitter, envious and resentful at these times. However, I turn these emotions around: I started wearing diapers. Now that I'm living on my own and have money, I can buy diapers.
I have a 28 inch waist, so I can fit into the large Goodnites, 5T Pull-Ups and some size 6/7 diapers (the only ones I can't fit in are Kroger's generic brand). I ordered some Bambino diapers (the teddy ones) and they should arrive tomorrow. I buy the girl Goodnites and Pull-Ups and pretend like I'm the sister/ daughter I don't have. ;-)
Becuase of my desire, I have another fantasy: to be a mommy. I roll deodorant on my tummy, pretending to have an ultrasound. I practice giving birth, even though nothing comes out. I've held my teddy bear (I was in the hospital in Nov. with a broken arm and recieved him then) upto my nipple and pretended to breastfeed him. I just put a Kroger diaper on teddy, so he'll be just like me. ;-)
Thanks for listening.