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Thread: I need some help on identifying myself...

  1. #1

    Default I need some help on identifying myself...

    So, this is the first time I've ever done this outside of particular ADISCers and another website, but I am a sissy. I love to wear girl clothes, especially cute and frilly dresses ^///^. The reason that I've been so scared to tell people, is that I tried telling someone I thought I was 100% sure who would accept me, my grandma. She didn't accept it. She rejected it, and threatened me with exposer. So the only people [Up until now] who knew, have been my mommy, my online family [but family none the less], and June. It's not that I didn't trust the rest of you guys, it's just I have stronger emotional feelings for them.. idk, hard to explain.

    But that's not the part I need help identifying myself as. I don't know.think I'm transexual/gender, but I feel as if I would be happier as a girl than I am as a guy. Like it's more meant for me, mentally. But I'm still happy to be a guy, I'd just be happier as a girl. It's hard to explain what I'm feeling exactly.

    Anyways, some help would be nice. If not, thanks anyways for reading c:

  2. #2

    Default

    Could you possibly mean that you are happy and fine and comfortable living as a guy, but wish you were a girl? Maybe you feel feminine in your mindset and like to be/act girly in situations that allow it? You want to be a girl without having to go through the surgery? Stuff like that?

    That's basically me... ;P I am biologically male, but identify as female. I'm not so far into the realm of female that I want to walk around dressed/made-up/looking like a female all the time (though sometimes I wish I could), nor do I want to change my sex to female. In my mind and actions, I feel and act like a girl. But everyone on the outside sees a guy, in men's clothes, doing typical boyish things. I behave like a man, talk like a man, act like a man in reality, but I truly wish and feel like I was/am a girl.

    It sounds like you and I are about at the same point, but I could be wrong. Identification is something you need to do on your own; you are what you perceive yourself to be. I am a girly guy. And I identify as both a girl and a boi as necessary. If you are a guy who wants to be a girl, you could call yourself whatever--Genderqueer, transgender, female, girl, boi, whatever. I would do a little looking around to see what you can find on gender identification and find a category that you feel fits most adequately.

  3. #3
    June

    Default

    Well let me first congratulate you on accepting yourself and being open about this, Abbie. You are certainly not alone, and need not fear judgement or discrimination here.

    I'm afraid I don't know a whole lot about the subject, but I can at least define a few things.

    A transgender person is a person that dresses, behaves, and or thinks ways that are associated with the opposite sex. A transsexual person is a person that has a neurological condition, usually one that does not match the anatomy of the person. The best way to find out yourself if you are transgender/transgender would be to learn more about each term and decide if either one describes you well.

    Again, I'm afraid I don't know a whole lot on the subject, but hopefully this will help a bit.

    Hugs.

  4. #4

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by KuuKuu View Post
    Could you possibly mean that you are happy and fine and comfortable living as a guy, but wish you were a girl? Maybe you feel feminine in your mindset and like to be/act girly in situations that allow it? You want to be a girl without having to go through the surgery? Stuff like that?

    That's basically me... ;P I am biologically male, but identify as female. I'm not so far into the realm of female that I want to walk around dressed/made-up/looking like a female all the time (though sometimes I wish I could), nor do I want to change my sex to female. In my mind and actions, I feel and act like a girl. But everyone on the outside sees a guy, in men's clothes, doing typical boyish things. I behave like a man, talk like a man, act like a man in reality, but I truly wish and feel like I was/am a girl.

    It sounds like you and I are about at the same point, but I could be wrong. Identification is something you need to do on your own; you are what you perceive yourself to be. I am a girly guy. And I identify as both a girl and a boi as necessary. If you are a guy who wants to be a girl, you could call yourself whatever--Genderqueer, transgender, female, girl, boi, whatever. I would do a little looking around to see what you can find on gender identification and find a category that you feel fits most adequately.


    Quote Originally Posted by June View Post
    Well let me first congratulate you on accepting yourself and being open about this, Abbie. You are certainly not alone, and need not fear judgement or discrimination here.

    I'm afraid I don't know a whole lot about the subject, but I can at least define a few things.

    A transgender person is a person that dresses, behaves, and or thinks ways that are associated with the opposite sex. A transsexual person is a person that has a neurological condition, usually one that does not match the anatomy of the person. The best way to find out yourself if you are transgender/transgender would be to learn more about each term and decide if either one describes you well.

    Again, I'm afraid I don't know a whole lot on the subject, but hopefully this will help a bit.

    Hugs.
    Thank you both, you guys *Hugs*. I know, I shouldn't worry about my label, but I want to know I think I'll look a bit more into the topics. Thanks again

  5. #5

    Default

    I think I fell the same way you do. I don't mind being a guy, but being a girl would make me more whole, or happy. I guess I'll never know though. I'm always speculation. But I think we are in the same boat! haha

    Unfortunately I cannot help you much though as I am still trying to figure things out for myself.

  6. #6

    Default

    Sorry to hear about your grandma abbie. As for your label, it sounds like a sissy. There are many things that qualify as transgender including cross dressing ans sissy play but transsexual is when people feel they should have been the other gender. If it doesn't leave your little play then I'd say you're a sissy but if you also like to cross dress...well then you're a cross dresser and a sissy.

  7. #7

    Default

    Abbie, sounds like you might be bi-gender. Finding who you are is a life long journey, and you're just beginning to take the first steps. I love to be a little girl and wish I could be some of the time, but I know that I don't want to always be. But you might, and only you can know for sure. Just ask yourself, and take a long time to think about it, how would my life be different if I did become female and wasn't a guy anymore. This can actually be accomplished with surgery and hormone treatments, but it's a huge commitment that can't be taken lightly. I'm not promoting anything, but try bigender.net. It's a forum of guys and gals that like to be both, and many take the necessary steps to accomplish that. It's not for me, but it might be what you've been searcing for your whole life.

    Good luck with who ever you become.

  8. #8

    Default

    I an only speak it being to hard know which is best I am definitely a sissy and maybe bi-gender an wear panties or a diaper 24/7, and would much rather wear a skirt than pants if I could get away with it, this puts me more on the transsexual side of the fence. Their is the crux of the question would you be willing to give up everything to be seen as a female by society/a doctor(thus truly transgendered from my understanding), or if you had to wear only part of time and reveal yourself only to certain people to maintain the status quo would you o that(more towards being a transsexual and sissy then transgender). Their is an official questionnaire online from a group of physiologist which tries to figure out the degree of these which your are and trys to help you make the right decisions based on the results I would take the results with a grain of salt because they are rather broad and may not fit your unique situation but they can point you in general direction to start researching.
    helpful links
    TV Questionnaire:
    Transsexual Tests
    Who Are You? A guide to transgender personalities
    Sex Change Handbook - Transgender Support Site
    hopefully these help you understand they helped me lot.
    I realized that while a large part of me would be happier as female, that an even larger part would be hurt greatly by the loss or change of relationships I have so I choose to be female in small ways with out hormones or surgery or full on public crossing. This has helped me to maintain who I am and who I wish to be.

  9. #9

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by asayuu View Post
    I an only speak it being to hard know which is best I am definitely a sissy and maybe bi-gender an wear panties or a diaper 24/7, and would much rather wear a skirt than pants if I could get away with it, this puts me more on the transsexual side of the fence. Their is the crux of the question would you be willing to give up everything to be seen as a female by society/a doctor(thus truly transgendered from my understanding), or if you had to wear only part of time and reveal yourself only to certain people to maintain the status quo would you o that(more towards being a transsexual and sissy then transgender). Their is an official questionnaire online from a group of physiologist which tries to figure out the degree of these which your are and trys to help you make the right decisions based on the results I would take the results with a grain of salt because they are rather broad and may not fit your unique situation but they can point you in general direction to start researching.
    helpful links
    TV Questionnaire:
    Transsexual Tests
    Who Are You? A guide to transgender personalities
    Sex Change Handbook - Transgender Support Site
    hopefully these help you understand they helped me lot.
    I realized that while a large part of me would be happier as female, that an even larger part would be hurt greatly by the loss or change of relationships I have so I choose to be female in small ways with out hormones or surgery or full on public crossing. This has helped me to maintain who I am and who I wish to be.
    I took the COGIATI one. I got Androgyne as my result. It seems pretty accurate. "Male and female", to put it shortly

  10. #10

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Abbie View Post
    I don't know/think I'm transsexual/gender, but I feel as if I would be happier as a girl than I am as a guy. Like it's more meant for me, mentally. But I'm still happy to be a guy, I'd just be happier as a girl. It's hard to explain what I'm feeling exactly.
    I feel the same way, don't know which side to stand on.

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