Hello! I'm new to this site (and message boards). I'm not AB/DL. I'm reaching out for input, straight from the source. Basically- I am seeing a guy who is DL and I really care about him. He is handsome, kind, so very smart... He's got it all. I want to love him completely but I feel like his DL interest is this canyon between us. So... I don't know what I'm asking for here... Can you talk me into it? Why is DL ... reasonable? I'm into being logical. But at the same time, being a music snob, I can subscribe to the seemingly Sesame Street idea that "everyone is different and likes different things." I've had to accept this since leaving high school, LOL, where I used to choose friends based partly on music preference. Hehe. I guess what I mean is that I used to think that what mattered to me was truly important, that I was "right". Now as a grown-up I'm reminded that my preferences are probably the result of upbringing, life experiences, and that my identity is based on a bunch of basically random circumstances. So it's sorta invalid.
I know that part of my "wtf" reaction is my ingrained, sorta pre-programmed assumption that certain activities are absolutely not sexual in nature. Like, for example, I have no interest in eating food for sexual pleasure. It's never occurred to me that it's a sexual activity. So I'm willing to open up my mind, but I don't know how.