Results 1 to 2 of 2

Thread: Acceptance: thoughts on telling others about your desires.

  1. #1

    Default Acceptance: thoughts on telling others about your desires.

    I recently had the opportunity to tell a close friend of mine (with whom I am not involved with sexually) about my AB/DL/Ageplay side. We were having a conversation about fetishes and BDSM and the like. I told her that I was into alternative sexual things, and she said I could tell her if I wanted. I had gone into the conversation willing to tell her, but after some thinking on my part, I decided against it.

    I got some insight on how to proceed from considering some advice I heard on Dan Savage's podcast. The gist was that someone into AB/DL things was considering telling their roommate about it. His response was, basically, "How would you feel if your roomate told you 'by the way, I eat my feces in the morning while in the shower?'" Granted, this is an extreme example, but it illustrates a great point. If you're not involved with someone sexually, your fetish is probably a bit too much information. That isn't to say that you shouldn't tell them, or you can't tell them; but generally if it's not relevant to your relationship, it could end up making things more awkward than anything else.

    Woohoo. I used my good ol' noggin and logic'd my way out of telling her, but my heart was still a bit confused.

    "So what the heck?" I thought to myself. "Why do I still feel like telling her on some level? And why do I feel like crap?"

    For me, the answer to that question is that I wanted to be accepted. I wanted to say "Hey, look at this part of me, do you still accept me?" I was feeling insecure. I wasn't completely accepting that part of myself. All of this focus on wanting to be accepted gave me a sort of tunnel vision, with only my little side in view.

    I lost track of the big picture: I am much more than just my little side. I have people that accept most of me without question! I have real life friends, I have my family, and I have everyone here that I can turn to if I am feeling like I need reassurance. I have awesome people in my life that I can have great times with because we all love and accept each other.

    It's from this solid base that I find I can be more accepting of myself as a whole. The desire to tell other people about my fetish to get their acceptance turns into a desire to let more of my little side into my personality in general because I don't have to feel ashamed. I'm me, and I don't need anyone to tell me whether I'm awesome or not.

    I realize this post was a bit long, so thanks so much for reading it! Writing it helped me process some things, and I hope reading it can help in a similar way for anyone that needs it. I'm interested to hear anyone's thoughts on what I've said, or for people to share their similar experiences to provide everyone with inspiration!

  2. #2


    Hmm, I've been thinking about this same subject ultimately. Gives me a lot to think about they way you put it. I've thought of it this way before, but i think i might have lost track of it a bit along the way. Thanks for the way you said it though, I think I've gained some insight into a problem I've been working on over the last while.

Similar Threads

  1. wre do these desires/feelings come from???????
    By babyracer37 in forum Adult Babies & Littles
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 31-Dec-2010, 11:07

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  • - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community. is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.