View Poll Results: I am a Town Y kind of person but live with my partner in Town X. I would rather live in Town Y and

9. You may not vote on this poll
  • I should take meds and hope I can be happy in Town X.

    0 0%
  • Leave my partner and go live in Town Y.

    6 66.67%
  • Get professional help and hope that one day I can be happy in Town X.

    3 33.33%
Results 1 to 8 of 8

Thread: When is depression not depression?

  1. #1

    Default When is depression not depression?

    If I live in Town X but I'm really a Town Y kind of person then I maybe kind of sad. My partner likes Town X and probably wouldn't be very happy in Town Y so we stay in Town X. But I really don't like Town X so get very sad, let's say depressed even. Perhaps I am so depressed I need medication. Should I....

    1. Take the medication and hope it helps?
    2. Move to town Y and leave my partner?
    3. Receive long-term treatment so I can learn to like living in Town X?

    This situation is made up but I am interested to know the response. I was initially going to frame this question around diapers but decided to make it more general by introducing the hypothetical situation of two towns.

  2. #2


    I would say to leave the partner if it comes down to it. You should both be able to care about one another's needs if you are both expecting to be with each other. I feel that being forced to live in an unhappy setting can potentially damage an entire relationship. I suggest both partners move into a "Town Z". That way neither partner feels unhappy by the setting. Compromise is the key. Therapy can go a long way but I'm not sure that it can completely turn around an individual's feelings toward a town. Living day after day in a town you absolutely loathe could be hard on someone's mental health.

    As for the medication, I feel that this should be the last possible option to relieve the negative mental feelings the individual is feeling. It only numbs the mental pain that the individual is currently going through.

  3. #3


    Out of those options 2.

    Although some kind of compromise would be the best solution, because then both parties could have a bit of what they wanted, and sacrifice some things as well. A compromise is the only fair solution, if one plans on having a long-term and healthy relationship.

  4. #4


    That's a tough question. Is there anyway you could compromise and either move or visit the other city so you don't feel so down? I'm moving to a town far from where I know and love for my spouse but know I can visit my home and he's making a big effort to help me feel at home in his's definitely all about give and take if you want any relationship to work. Hope you find a resolution!

  5. #5


    If you can't move to Town Y, non-drug professional treatment is just going to help you compromise or learn to make due with Town X, which is nothing you can't do yourself if you're a reasonable, level-headed person. So I vote for the non-existent "stay in in Town X and find alternate modes of entertainment." For example, is there another town nearby that you can visit to hang out? Or, can you pick up a hobby that you can enjoy in Town X? I think there are far more options than ditching the partner, taking drugs, or getting therapy.

  6. #6


    I came here for the actual question:"When is depression not depression?".
    I'm pretty sure I've experienced it which I might go into sometime on this site but medically its an actual physical state your body enters. Your brain is emitting thousands if not millions of hormones all the time and depression is when the hormone that controls sadness etc overloads your system. The thing about the sad hormone is that it triggers more of itself so if you do 'overload your system' with it then it can be a very difficult state to get out of. As for dealing with it Therapy is always a very effective way to lift yourself out of that state, there are many tecnques that therapists can use to break the viscous hormonal cycle which causes depression. As for drugs, their really not the answer, the simple act of taking a walk outside will stimulate more 'happy hormones' than any medical drugs we have now. Any form of exercise is always a great way to relieve stress and negative feelings.
    As for me, the way I got out of depression was though religion. Say what you want about the truth and reality of it all but never say that its a completely bad thing. Religion doesn't create wars, humans do.
    Anyway I hope this helped, if you want me to outline some therapeutic methods of dealing with depression, I know a couple, all you need to do is ask.

  7. #7


    So the usual disclaimer about not providing medical advice to specific individuals on a forum, and addressing more general approaches applies...
    So I mean if the sole cause of my depression was living in a specific place I think the solution, if possible is, as others have suggested compromise or move, however I think the more important (or difficult) question to answer is making sure that the scenario is "I don't like town x so I am depressed" in which case there is a non-medical treatment, vs "I am depressed therefore I don't like town X" in which case a patient might benefit from talking with a psychologist/psychiatrist or possibly talking certain medication. Hopefully that made sense, my usual limit of psych is asking "Suicidal? Homicidal?" if yes, commit, if no, don't commit...

  8. #8


    Could it be a "grass is greener" type of ideal between the two options?

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