I have had bowel and urinary incontinence all my life. When I was younger my parents never tried to potty train me, because the doctor said I would never have control, due to a small bladder. I have never known what it's like to have control, so I've never been sad about my incontinence. The only set back is that I always have to keep spare diapers with me, always know where changing places are located, and be on the constant look out for leaks.
I wear Abena x-Plus at night (with plastic pants) and a Bambino in the day. These diapers work very well for my active lifestyle and contain whatever messes I make (with the occasional leak).
As for the smell of fecal matter,there's no stopping it.
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If anyone can relate, I'd like to hear from you!