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Thread: Friend requests

  1. #1

    Default Friend requests

    Hey just wondering how you guys/girls decide to accept friend requests because I was raised to protect my identity and for one reason or another I just don't feel comfortable friending people I do not know. Any response would be helpful.

  2. #2


    Well never friend someone you don't feel comfortable with. If someone sends you a friends request and you kinda wanna be their friend but don't know them well enough try talking to them through PMs till you feel comfortable with it.

    you never have to tell anyone your identity if you do not want to/don't feel comfortable with it.

  3. #3


    Quote Originally Posted by pamperedwolf View Post
    Hey just wondering how you guys/girls decide to accept friend requests because I was raised to protect my identity and for one reason or another I just don't feel comfortable friending people I do not know. Any response would be helpful.
    I personally do not have this particular “friends” problem. The story goes; as a child, my mother used to tie a piece of string to a butchers bone and hang it around my neck, so the neighbourhood dogs would play with me.

    There is no unwritten requirement cohering you to accept friend requests. If you are unhappy with any request you should certainly reject it. The award for setting the highest standards belongs to HogansHeroes, allegedly he insists that you should be vetted by the CIA among others. Regardless of what you decide your standards are, you certainly will not be pushing out the proverbial envelope.

    Seriously though, I have friends here on adisc that would know more of me than some of those on my friends list. From that it is fair to say that I do not set a high bar in accepting friends requests. What information I impart will vary from person to person. I am ever so guarded with personally identifiable markers, ie name, local area, etc. When it comes to discussing my children, you have two hopes of learning anything of them and one of those hopes is, Bob Hope.

    All I’d say is divide information up into at least three categories;
    1/ Will tell, your public face on here.
    2/ Might tell, friends only – some more than others.
    3/ Never tell, any information that will personally identify you or your exact location. By sorting this in advance you will save headaches later.

  4. #4


    I have a rule that I'm only friends with people I've either met in real life (or have the intention of doing tres soon) or have chatted to VERY extensively online, and if I had the opportunity to meet in real life, I wouldn't have any qualms about doing so straight away.

  5. #5


    As for friend requests on this site, I generally accept people I know and wouldn't mind knowing them a little better. Kinda a friendly suggestion to do so. I don't give out many friend requests. But I generally choose to be friends with people I am friendly with. I don't see the whole need to commit of having no privacy. It's just a name under a list, and in some cases, allow it as a white list who can see certain pictures/blogs you put on the site.

    If you're worried about privacy, just be careful what you say. You can easily add some one as a friend and not know about their personal details after talking on a regular basis, enjoying eachother's company. Or in my case it varies wildly, Most members don't know when my birthday is, or what my first name is. But certain members do know how to contact me outside the forum. But that is on a need-to-know basis, which for some people could be never. And are happy to use the forum as it is.

    I think it's whatever you're comfortable in the end. Don't get you're head hung up because some one asked to be friends and you didn't expect it. Like I said, you haven't committed to anything and it's up to you what to do. But if they're complete strangers and you haven't seen them, or seem a little creepy. You can just as easily reject it as accept it.

  6. #6


    Same... I don't accept everyone. I only accept if we already talked via on forums, intention to chat and keep in touch, and plenty of info on the profile too. I don't accept newbies especially the ones with blank profile or rarely be on here, or that we never talk prior to the request.

  7. #7

  8. #8


    For what its worth, friend requests on this site incur almost not special privileges (I believe you can set pictures you upload to friends-only, but that's the only concrete benefit/risk). Essentially, all that happens when you accept a friend request is that the name and avatar of the person who sent the request will appear on the 'Friends' tab in your profile.

    I'm one of the most vocal people here for protecting our members' privacy, and particularly minors, to the extent I've often been accused of overkill. I must admit that our 'Friends' system is incredibly benign.

  9. #9


    I'm only friends with people who I have talked to in chat for a long time, and some of them are RL friends. Most of the people on my friends list don't even visit here anymore I think :p

  10. #10


    Most of the people on my ADISC friends list are:
    a. people I've meet IRL.
    b. people I would be willing to meet IRL.
    c. people that I've talked too a lot and who's company I enjoy (lots of overlap with this and points a or b).
    d. people who's postings on the forum or on the IRC I've enjoyed.

    As a rule I don't accept friend requests from people I don't at least recognize.

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