Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 11

Thread: Im sick of all the stares

  1. #1

    Default Im sick of all the stares

    There everywhere. No the people but there eyes. sorry need to vent this out or Ima go crazy. lets start at beginning. when I first came to japan( again after so many years) thought man this is gonna be great. I managed to get enrolled in a public school, got a job at a convenience store, and even got a gig as an assistant for a mangaka( I think thats spelled right) in weekly shonen jump.
    Now to the akward part. i get off the plane get my bags go to manage to get a cab and all while doing that I get stares some good, some bad, and oddly enough some even in discuss. some even ask me to take pictures with them( not that I didn't mind it at first, still not complaining at times but its frankly starting to annoy me.
    now there were alot of races at the airport white, hispanic, mexican etc. but some how it only me that gets singled out. I feel like an endangered species.

    skip to present day.
    evsn now i stiil get stares even in class or at lunch even work and even people that see me everyday. like right now im on a train still getting stares. its anoyyiiiiiiiiiiiing but ill make it like any other

  2. #2


    tai, have you just thought about ignoring it or is that not going to be possible? I know if it were me, I'd be a little bothered by the stares at first, but I'd get over it & not even pay much attention to it after a little while & might even have some fun with it!! I wish you luck with this issue you are having & hope it gets better for you!!

  3. #3

  4. #4


    From what I understand, westerners stand out like a rainbow in a grey sky. On average, we're a lot taller than the average Asian, some of us are blond (something that simply doesn't exist naturally in Asia), and obviously have different facial features (bigger noses, bigger eyes). So if you're tall, blond and handsome, you probably do stick out in the crowd, and people will notice.

    The question is: Why do people approach you? I realize Asian cultures are very group-oriented and stick to their own group. As such, while they may have as much of an interest in other cultures, their involvement is mostly theoretical. I reckon they lack the actual real life involvement in other cultures that we get here in the western world, where we're individualists and thus have a greater need and ability to get involved with strangers. Beats me why they consider it a good idea to consider anyone so physically different from themselves a 'freak show', like a black speckled one-eyed polar bear with wings. Still, I would have expected them to stare and giggle, all right, but to come up and ask for pictures - that's really bad.


  5. #5


    I have a nice 6 inch long white beard and no one in Calif even notices.

    But in some parts of Texas they look at me as strange.

    But i think some people in Texas are strange too.

  6. #6


    That's sucks... =( I hate when people stare at me unless it's good reason, such as whenever I use sign language and some people find it so interesting to watch. If someone stares at me for no reason, then I will give them a quick cold look back and it always works to make them stop staring. I know it's tad rude but hey, they are rude in first place anyway. Didn't your parents teach you not to stare at people (and make them uncomfortable)? hehe.

  7. #7


    Quote Originally Posted by Peachy View Post
    The question is: Why do people approach you? I realize Asian cultures are very group-oriented and stick to their own group.

    Still, I would have expected them to stare and giggle, all right, but to come up and ask for pictures - that's really bad.
    When I was in China people were asking to get a picture with me all the time. I didn't notice any giggling but maybe they were giggling in Chinese which wouldn't sound like the ti-hi-hi of anywhere else? Guess I'm just super handsome then!

    OP, chances are, people aren't laughing at you even if they're staring. What would you do if a 7'6" African person came and went to your school? I know I'd be taking a look at him any time he came around. It's not derogatory, it's just... curiosity.

  8. #8


    ultimately you have to deal with the fact that you are a gaijin and by extension a bit of an oddity in Japan. there is a very ethic sense of national identity in Japan which is very different from America (the land with more words for grandmother then any other country).

    Depending on where you are in the country people may see you as their chance to interact with a real live foreigner, you are coming up against the force of raw ignorance. (I don't mean that in any negative connotation, I'm just saying they lack the experience necessary to know any better.) I know its nerve racking but have you considered starting a conversation with some of the people who are staring at you. It will at least stop that one person.

    You stand out, and will always stand out. So use that to your advantage. It sounds like you've really started to get yourself set up over there job and school and all, and congratulations on that, so I'm sure things will work out in time or more time as the case may be.

    and if your in the mood for watching a bit of youtube look up a guy called bobby judo if I remember correctly he did a few vlogs on this subject.

  9. #9


    Living in the United States and lot of other countries we are used to seeing a lot of diversity. I've been friends with people that are Asian, African American, Hispanic, and Native American. As much as some would like to say otherwise, the United States is among one of the most diverse and racially accepting countries in the world.

    Some countries though have a lot less diversity though and when somebody does live there it usually means they are really intelligent or have some sort of talent that makes them desirable in a different part of the world. For instance there are many Asians that are good at math (here me out on this one )in the United States. This doesn't mean that Asians are generally better at math, it's just that all of the good university's for math and science in the United States and so the people attracted to that profession come here.

    Or as you will often see, foreign exchange students are among some of the most intelligent and nice people. In general thats not a reflection of their country it's because they had these traits that they were selected as a exchange student in the first place.

  10. #10


    Get a shirt that says something like "hey lets all look at the white guy" but not that something that works in Japanese and is funny, that way they will laugh and see how ridiculous staring is.

Similar Threads

  1. I'm sick..... ;[
    By Catinthehat in forum Off-topic
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 25-Sep-2011, 20:33
  2. So sick...
    By PetPuppyAlex in forum Diaper Talk
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 19-Sep-2011, 17:57
  3. sick?
    By plato in forum Adult Babies & Littles
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: 29-Jul-2010, 00:15
  4. what do you when you get sick?
    By Draconil Tailsfire in forum Off-topic
    Replies: 32
    Last Post: 13-Jun-2008, 21:48

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  • - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community. is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.