Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 19

Thread: I've accepted everything and I'm coming out a different closet.

  1. #1

    Default I've accepted everything and I'm coming out a different closet.

    I've always asserted the idea on here that I am not a sissy. I wear girly clothes and love girly things when regressing, but that was because I felt entirely more infantile.

    I guess the reason why I felt more infantile, was because I felt more normal. I felt right. I felt like that's who I was. And the funny thing is, is that it wasn't because I was regressing. It's because I wanted to be a girl.

    I'm not sure what the demographics are for transsexual infantalists, but I'm one of them. This wasn't a random decision - I've been battling this for a long, long time. As of a month ago, I accepted that I wasn't happy with being a guy. I understood why I identify with women. I feel happy when I can be a woman. Ironically, it was during Canadian thanksgiving while cooking a turkey dinner for 10 people. I couldn't eat anything. I was having anxiety attacks. I broke down in front of my friends.

    I wont get into the details or history; I've now accepted myself as transsexual (male to female) after so long of ignoring it and countering it with trying to be manly. This was similar, actually, to when I figured out I was a TB back in the day.

    I've begun my transition to female, and I'm so excited. This is the first time in my life I genuinely felt like I had a future and that I liked myself.

    I didn't want to do a blog entry, because a lot of blogs go unnoticed, and I figured that this is a reasonable bit of information that should be used to further educate people in the demographics of AB/TB/DL people. Heaven knows how often us *Bs go unnoticed with zero support, very little information or explanations. We have a quite few *Bs, but yet our group is non-existant. I've accepted myself as an AB for 8 friggin years, and it surprises me that the only thing that people understand about us is from what they saw on CSI.

    So, I suppose this calls for an AMA (ask a man anything (or woman) ). Please, fire questions at me. Let's learn a little more about the involvement in the *B/DL world.

  2. #2

    Default

    Happy for you! I can't imagine how difficult and confusing that must have been to go through. Except I do remember finally admitting to myself I was gay, and how much better I felt, so I suppose it's sort of like that. Like a voice at the back of your mind that you know is there, and you keep telling yourself it isn't there, and then eventually you admit it's there and you listen to it.

    At any rate, congratulations. I assume the next big hurdle for you will be telling your family, so good luck in advance for that one.

  3. #3

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by SubstanceD View Post
    Like a voice at the back of your mind that you know is there, and you keep telling yourself it isn't there, and then eventually you admit it's there and you listen to it.
    Pretty spot-on. The hardest part is acceptance. Once you can identify the problem and accept it, the solution is easy to figure out.

    I've started HRT, so I'm on the way to being myself. I'm slowly telling people I trust about this and what I'm doing. They've all been fantastic (as in, they want to grab my boobs ). I have told more people (like, 6 total) about being trans than about being an AB. Again, I'm reminded of always playing the lg role in ageplay. I assumed that it was the role that made me feel more infantile, but it turned out to be the role I universally wanted. Being an AB probably delayed me understanding this, but it made it easier to deal with. I came out as trans to a friend about a month and half ago, so I've had lots of time to reflect on this.

    Thanks for the luck. I will have to talk to family, which is huge. How I do it is another problem...

  4. #4
    bjm904

    Default

    How confused you must be. It is very good you accept it though.
    Family is going to be the hardest part. They will accept it in the end, of course.

  5. #5

    Default

    You have my best wishes, Jimini. This will be a long and hard road at first, but much easier than living your life as something you know that you are not. Good luck, good journey.

  6. #6

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by bjm904 View Post
    How confused you must be. It is very good you accept it though.
    Family is going to be the hardest part. They will accept it in the end, of course.
    It was quite confusing. I broke down and nearly cried when telling my best friend. As for them accepting it in the end.. Well, let's just say I'm prepared to lose my family.



    Quote Originally Posted by fifigal View Post
    You have my best wishes, Jimini. This will be a long and hard road at first, but much easier than living your life as something you know that you are not. Good luck, good journey.
    Thanks, hon. I expect nothing more than discrimination, relentless bullying, and hardships. If I'm happy with who I am, then come at me, bro! Thanks again.

  7. #7
    bjm904

    Wink



    Quote Originally Posted by jimini View Post
    Well, let's just say I'm prepared to lose my family.
    awww don't say that! Optimism is key in these situations.

  8. #8

    Default

    Im sure you'll be very happy, you have the best of wishes from me, good luck.

  9. #9

    Default

    Sometimes circumstances create rifts in our families, including separation. It shouldn't of course, but all families are different. It was very difficult for me when my mom discovered my diapers and gay porn. Honestly, what do you say? I'm sorry isn't appropriate, just, this is who I am, take it or leave it.

    It was worse in the late 60's because everyone, and especially psychiatrists, thought that homosexuality was caused by past experiences, and thus, psychotherapy could make you straight. I'm not sure what they thought about gender reassignment, but I know they did it back then. I think they were at least smart enough to know that sometimes nature just wasn't complete enough in how it assigned sexual traits. Anyway, everyone is a unique person, with a unique combination of traits, whether they are sexual assignments, personality traits, out going or shy. How sad that parents or anyone can't accept our differences and embrace us with love.

    As you may have seen on this site, I too went home during college, had dinner with my parents and some company which they had invited for dinner, and I suddenly started crying. Everything that I was, and everything that I had done for four years in college came suddenly crashing down, as if, all at once. That's when my mom searched my room. In the end, we are who we are, this great mixture of a million traits. Sometimes it works and sometimes it causes problems. If you can find a solution which makes you happy, then that's what you should do. All I can do is wish you the very best, and hope that you will always be happy.

  10. #10

Similar Threads

  1. ABism will never be accepted.
    By Possibly Insane in forum Adult Babies & Littles
    Replies: 126
    Last Post: 24-May-2011, 01:37
  2. Wow, coming out of the diaper closet does get easier and easier!
    By GoldDragonAurkarm in forum Adult Babies & Littles
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 02-Apr-2011, 08:29
  3. Coming out of the closet...
    By thanksforallthefish in forum Greetings / Introductions
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 04-Aug-2009, 05:31

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
ADISC.org - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community.
ADISC.org is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.