For those who don't know my background. Over the summer did an Internship at DC spent 10 weeks there. Meet an amazing person that I hung out with a lot. We bonded yatta yatta. Well I miss her a lot and I miss everything I had I miss the life I knew over there fucked up shit is I can never get it back. I will never be able to hang with her like that again, I won't ever have that life... not possible, I miss it obviously like hell... to the point where I'm miserable here. I'm miserable back in my home... the house I grew up in with the people I love. I long for an empty apartment with my roomates gone... and no privacy? WHY the FUCK?!
My current room is only 8X10 (feet) it's no bigger then a walking closet back in the US. People I live around are just too fucking idiotic and below my intelligence level. (Puertorricans) I've grown to despise my own race? WTF?! I'm a racist? No cool man...
I keep talking to my friend E...friend from DC she's moved on shes out of PR and I envy her... shes able to find jobs rather quickly obviously not in her field but hey it's something while I cannot find anything. Nothing...I got rejected by Mcdonalds here.... how pathethic is that? Yet I see blaring morons fucking idiots just doing nothing.
Doesn't help that I miss her and want to hang out with her again and her uprupt depature from PR kinda has me messed up sometimes. Didn't get to say good bye not really and I envy her situation sometimes. She has what I want. obviously I'm still in my third year of college and shit... But my family is driving me insane not a day goes by that I long to be back... what do I do? Shit is what I long for is something I can never get back... never ever ever get back?
And I don't get why I'm homesick for a place that never felt like a home? A place that was empty and made me depress at times? WTF?! Why do I feel this way I just dont' get it.... I only have 7 months left here before I move. I don't know what to do with myself.... parents driving me crazy no income...no job.... nothing.... FML.... advice please?