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Thread: So I've been shying away from AB/DL, but...

  1. #1

    Default So I've been shying away from AB/DL, but...

    I might know someone who may take my place... That person? My little 12 year old sister. She stumbled on some stories and drawn pictures while rogue'ing her way into my computer. She openly admitted her keen interest in the whole thing, and now has asked me to buy her diapers, a paci, and a bottle...

    What does one do? I'm 20 years old, and she's 12... Granted, I was MUCH younger when I first got into the diaper lifestyle, and I was 12 when I started wearing again much more frequently... Do I go through with it, because I am in NO WAY sexually attracted to her at all. I would kill myself before I would do something that cruel to her. Do I just let her indulge a bit and see how far she'll take it?

  2. #2


    I would help her understand that there is nothing wrong with that urge (people do weird things), I would buy her a pack (thats me). And it would not be a sexual thing, like even changing wouldn't be sexual.

  3. #3


    So supposing you decided to buy her a paci or diapers or something, how would the parents react in the instance they found the stuff? Would you be getting her, or you, or both, into trouble?

    Moving on from there, I suppose it's up to you whether you want to buy her anything, but if you do, I think you'll have to set some clear boundaries. For instance, you could buy her diapers once or however often, but no changing whatsoever, and make it plain how much you're willing to spend and at what point you're drawing the line. I would strongly strongly strongly recommend against changing her or getting too involved with whatever play, innocent or not, she might engage in.

    At any rate, be excessively cautious in this. There's a lot of potential for someone like a parent to stumble onto something and make everything go sideways on your real quick.

  4. #4


    First of all, I'd question WHY she's saying this stuff all of a sudden. I would worry she's doing it to impress you, or maybe even to make you feel at ease with it. So I would sit her down, and explain that you love her and like her the same no matter what, and you won't love her more or less if she decides she wants to do this. I don't know your relationship, so you'll know if this is a big possibility better than I do. Make sure she's not just trying to 'be like big bro', or whatever, is all I'm saying.

    Maybe have a chat with her about why she feels this way. Don't lead her ('Did you always feel this way, did those stories remind you, or did you just see them and start feeling this way?'), but say 'When did you start feeling this way?', let her tell you what she thinks sounds nice about it, what feelings she has about it.

    Secondly, you need to have a serious word with her about privacy. Both respecting yours, and keeping her own. Tell her you don't want her snooping around on your computer any more; do anything you can to prevent it happening again, and say you're disappointed in her for doing it.

    Make sure she understands, as best she can, that if this doesn't stay private it could have big, BIG consequences for herself. Tell her she shouldn't try to expose any of it to anyone else; that if anyone found out, they'd probably find it very weird and not be very nice to her about it. Stress that it's not /wrong/, but it is very, very different.

    Also make sure she agrees to keep it to herself, away from YOU. I think it's acceptable for you to 'baby' her a little (in the traditional sense, of coddling and letting her watch little kid shows, whatever... not the AB sense of changing and bottlefeeding), especially if your parents brush aside any childish desires she has as 'for babies'. Maybe give her a safe space to be a little childish and not be criticized, but don't feed her bottles or treat her like a baby. Tell her it should be private, and kept to her room, especially when your parents are home.

    As for buying her things, I would make /her/ buy them, otherwise you risk her getting comfy with the idea of you always supplying her with diapers. If she has pocket money, maybe supplement that with some of yours. If she doesn't, give her the money and take her 'round the shop, reminding her that once she gets old enough to have money she'll need to buy this stuff herself. Let her choose, even if you think she's buying 'inferior' products. The last thing you want to do is to give her the impression you're 'in charge' of what she uses for baby time (for obvious reasons).

    Teach her about safe use, disposal and hygiene, make sure she can't wriggle onto any 'dirty' sites about diapers, and let her know she can confide in you (without going over-the-top (e.g. don't let her talk about her diapers, how nice they feel, how she loves peeing in them, whatever... if she does, say 'Ew! Gross! I don't want to hear about your undies!' :P) Best of luck, tell us how it goes!

  5. #5


    If she want, so that would search for these items herself. Her bussines. HOWGH

  6. #6


    CharliePup hit the nail right on the head. I couldn't have said ANYTHING better myself. Just to stress that this can, and in all likeliness WILL blow up in your face if there is any public knowledge that you're helping her acquire these "weird" things; especially if this knowledge hits your parent's ears. We naturally try to find comfort in familiar things, diapers, in this instance, and if she instills comfort in the idea of you taking "control" of the situation, she'll want to push you further and further into the figure of caregiver, which it sounds like you're trying to stray from (a wise idea).

    Maybe I'm wrong with this, but you know how the saying goes: "If you give a mouse a cookie..."

    Best of luck, and I hope everything works out fine.

  7. #7


    Tell her the struggles you had to go through to get your own and tell her she has to do the same. Helping a sibling with anything potentially sexually related is kinda weird and wrong. Or just ignore it... I vote for the second option.

  8. #8


    I agree that CharliePup encompassed a lot of good boundries to establish. Not much to really add! As a little sister myself, i can understand idealizing an older sibling, in many ways. But I do think you will have to do a lot of mentoring ahead if you choose to help her. You are still living with your parents? Establishing that she pay with allowance money, if your family does that, I agree that that would be best for she has to earn the right not only to pay for her things, but more importantly, to gain your trust; like she is trusting in you. Tough decision, but I think that it can be good for both of you as siblings.

  9. #9


    Jumping on the bandwagon, CharliePup really hit a lot of good points. This is a big moment for you both and you need to tread lightly so that neither of you get hurt and you don't just brush her aside. Telling you that she is interested is a huge thing, so do your best to take care of her and you.

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