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Thread: A Point of View: Modern parenting

  1. #1

    Default A Point of View: Modern parenting

    I just came across this very well written article on the BBC News website. It made me think of the reasons many people here seem to feel are behind their *B/DLism, so I thought I'd share it;

    BBC News - A Point of View: Modern parenting

  2. #2


    Would not seem to apply in my case. I'm old enough to be one of the ones appalled by that kind of parenting and that's not how things were for me. I don't really know what caused this for me and it weighs on me less and less as time goes by. I don't think there's an ABDL gene, so experiences must have driven it but I really can't think of any definitive trigger or even sequence of triggers that would reasonably incline someone to be interested in this. I think it's more likely that it's just an odd combination of factors that any number of people might have been exposed to and come out with totally different results. In short, I don't blame anyone for it. It's just how I am.

  3. #3


    I agree with Trevor in the sense that I believe AB/DLism to be a combination of random factors and not one that can be controlled solely by parenting.

    However, I did enjoy the article =).

  4. #4


    Interesting article, that's for sure, but it doesn't make it any easier for me to put the finger on the sore spot.

    I do experience negative feelings towards the parenting of the past years - even though I'm only 19, things have changed a lot in the last two decades, and I can already see that nowadays, everyone wants their children to have absolutely everything, only the very best, everything they want so that they don't have to deal with negative feelings at all. As stated in the article, this is even true for really simple things such as their evening meals; everything needs to be planned to the smallest detail. The main reason I hate this, is the inconvenience it causes for people around those kids: they can be as annoying as they wish and not be held responsible, they can get everything they want at the cost of other people, they're just very spoiled in general. I'm very unsure if this stuff will lead to happier adults, though.. it could go either way.

    This kind of parenting may even induce AB-ism to the children in question! With such an easy and happy childhood, the contrast will be even greater during and after puberty, and people may start longing back to their early childhood even more.

    But the reason I'm an AB/DL? I don't think it's the main reason, but it might be one of the things that augmented it. Who knows.

  5. #5


    interesting article indeed, 41 years ago I new I wasn't wanted for me and new I wasn't loved and hadn't been for probably the 13c years before that, basically since I was born. But do I cry myself to sleep over it now. No. Yes, I'm still emotionally and psychologically damaged by what occured but not to the point that I can't function in a modern world

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