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Thread: Moral concern

  1. #1

    Default Moral concern

    I have had a problem with the sexual aspect of diaper play since I first started buying goodnites. I always thought that I would eventually give up diapers all together and "grow up" thereby making the issue of sexuality obsolete anyways. Now that I am older and accepting that infantilism is not going to go away, the sexual issue is starting to bother me.

    I am not sexually interested in children in anyway, but like most people here I tend to play an older kid wearing diapers rather than a pure infant. I usually aim to be about 7-8. That means that I am involving childhood themes and paraphernalia with sexual fantasy. This is a bit of a stretch, but that association makes me nervous both as a moral human being but also as someone who wants to eventually have kids of my own. What happens if my own kids end up wetting the bed or have a disability and have to wear diapers?

    Anyone else concerned about long term implications of associating sexual feelings with childhood themes? What about people that have kids? Ever had a problem with your fetish and the real world?

  2. #2

    Default

    I'm not sure, I guess I'm still in denial... I don't WANT to be sexually aroused by diapers but I am, The solution I've found is to just separate the two. when I feel aroused I just put all my BF stuff away.

    I guess I do it for the same reason your concerned... I want to have children and don't want to associate the two things.

    I kinda feel like the two are oposites, Inocence Vs. lust. I'm still really unsure though... I totally feel ya.

    In my opinion, the fact that you have thought about this, and are concerned about the possible issue points out to me that you have good morals, I'm sure you'll be fine

  3. #3

    Default

    You have raised a very legitimate concern. This is something my SO have not really talked about in detail. He's a DL and has high morals as well. For this reason, I am quite hesitant about having a child. Although I'd be happy to bear children if he wants that, I am secretly wishing we'll have things figured out before having one. I once asked him about it and said that he'll hide it from our children if ever. On the other hand, it's sad to think that he'd have to have a secret life from his very own children, in case.

  4. #4

    Default

    A very interesting question.

    With regards to what [/member]sovereigngrace[member] said, why on earth would that be sad? All parents have secrets from their children by the very nature of their relationship. For example, I now know for a fact that until very close to my fathers death my mum and dad were engaging in sexual relations. That's not something I ever EVER wanted to know, but it somehow got mentioned. That is a secret that my parents have had from me for the past 21 years. As far as I'm concerned (as I'm sure most people will agree with me) my parents had sex to make me the once, and then that was it. I know that's not true, but I'm happy to believe that. Why would it be a shame for your husband to keep a sexual things from your children? I enjoy the occasionally kinky thing in the bedroom, that's not for my children to know, and it's not a bad secret or a secret life either, certainly nothing to be ashamed of, it's just something that doesn't concern my (potential future) children, and never will.

    With regards to the question at hand, I've always been a babysitter/volunteer with various childrens groups and in recent years since I've been aware of this fettish I've found the two completely different. Just like say, I occasionally like to be spanked sexually, that doesn't mean I get off on watching a child being given a smack, I certainly don't. Most people who have a fettish can recognise the difference between a fettish and real life. What you do in your spare time away from your children is up to you, and as long as you don't project your feelings onto your child when they're wearing diapers/sucking a paci/whatever then it's not a problem. The most important thing to do is to just bring them up as you would if you didn't have this fettish, and aim to let them be the best they can be.

  5. #5
    BabyJayk

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by patrick1776 View Post
    I have had a problem with the sexual aspect of diaper play since I first started buying goodnites. I always thought that I would eventually give up diapers all together and "grow up" thereby making the issue of sexuality obsolete anyways. Now that I am older and accepting that infantilism is not going to go away, the sexual issue is starting to bother me.

    I am not sexually interested in children in anyway, but like most people here I tend to play an older kid wearing diapers rather than a pure infant. I usually aim to be about 7-8. That means that I am involving childhood themes and paraphernalia with sexual fantasy. This is a bit of a stretch, but that association makes me nervous both as a moral human being but also as someone who wants to eventually have kids of my own. What happens if my own kids end up wetting the bed or have a disability and have to wear diapers?

    Anyone else concerned about long term implications of associating sexual feelings with childhood themes? What about people that have kids? Ever had a problem with your fetish and the real world?
    I had a similar concern when trying to accept my AB-ness if you will. People wonder that they will have sexual feelings toward anyone in diapers because they like to wear them. Frankly, if you enjoy wearing diapers yourself, or you are attracted to ADULTS of the opposite sex in diapers you probably wont experience the same feelings when children are involved. Think about regular heterosexual males. If they find a certain dress that their wife wears arousing, does that mean that when their 8 year old daughter wears a similar garment that they will be attracted to her sexually? Of course not. Now if you find yourself becoming aroused by seeing 7-8 year olds running around in the grocery store then there might be cause for some worry. But if you aren't you should be fine.

  6. #6

    Default

    Dealing with incontinence and diapers, my kids know I wear. You would be surprised how easy it is to separate diapers for yourself from children, be it your own or someone else's. There is a MAJOR difference between having sexual desires associated with diapers and partners diapered and young children in diapers. Sexual feelings are about your desire for people and things (in the case of fetishes) that you find arousing. If you do not find children arousing, children in diapers will not be arousing. If you find an adult of the appropriate gender arousing, then you can have sexual feelings with them and your fetish.

    One other thing about your own children: YOU raise them from the point they start out as a helpless infant. You protect and nurture them, and provide what they need. There is a HUGE difference between watching an infant grow into an adult and having desire for that person. It is EASY to separate sexual desires from parental desires.

  7. #7

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by patrick1776 View Post
    I have had a problem with the sexual aspect of diaper play since I first started buying goodnites. I always thought that I would eventually give up diapers all together and "grow up" thereby making the issue of sexuality obsolete anyways. Now that I am older and accepting that infantilism is not going to go away, the sexual issue is starting to bother me.

    I am not sexually interested in children in anyway, but like most people here I tend to play an older kid wearing diapers rather than a pure infant. I usually aim to be about 7-8. That means that I am involving childhood themes and paraphernalia with sexual fantasy. This is a bit of a stretch, but that association makes me nervous both as a moral human being but also as someone who wants to eventually have kids of my own. What happens if my own kids end up wetting the bed or have a disability and have to wear diapers?

    Anyone else concerned about long term implications of associating sexual feelings with childhood themes? What about people that have kids? Ever had a problem with your fetish and the real world?
    Absolutely not. Of all the issues I did have reconciling my ABDL desires, the association with actual children was never one of them.

    I've always wanted diapers, as long as I can remember. At some point I hit puberty and that desire became sexual. Although I am more of a toddler as an ABDL, I've always known, realized, accepted, and frankly, embraced the fact that I am not a real fodder, that I am older, old enough to make conscious decisions, including the decision to occasionally wear diapers and be toddlerish. I'm not interested in children at all, nor am I interested in being a parent. Just because I get a rise from a garment does not mean I get a rose from children, and I don't honestly see enough of a connection to lose any sleep over.

  8. #8

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by patrick1776 View Post
    What about people that have kids? Ever had a problem with your fetish and the real world?
    I hope I can speak for all of the parents here when I say that my child's diapers were just that. I never thought of any other implication than that he needed them and that it was my solemn responsibility to take care of him by keeping him healthy and sanitarily disposing of his waste until he grew and matured to the point that he no longer needed that assistance.

  9. #9

    Default

    My fiance and I just had a baby, and I can tell you for sure that there is no crossover of my DL side and my son. I have changed a ton of his diapers, and belive me, it's no turn on!

    In truth I was a little worried about this before the little kiddlet was born. There would be all sorts of baby stuff around, I would be changing diapers, all that jazz. What if it turned me on? Gross! I had nothing to worry about. One reason is that these things belong to my son, and not me. I'm not going to take his things for my own use. Even if I wanted to none of it would fit, since I'm a bit bigger then a newborn.

    Another reason is that, for me at least, my AB/DL stuff is driven largly by internal stuff. That thing that turns me on is the feeling of wearing a diaper, or when I'm looking at them, imagining the feeling.

    If none of that helps, think of it this way. Do you like women? Yes? Are you afraid of being turned on by your kid if you have a girl? not likely. There is a disconect there when it comes to your kids, and its there for diapers too.

    I'll shut up now, since this is rambling... Sleep deprivation and all.

  10. #10
    Toonaml

    Default

    Very interesting question, i need to think about this 1...

    I do get aroused by diapers, not children in diapers, just girls my own age!

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