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Thread: Any tips to protect yourself if you are extremely nice?

  1. #1

    Cool Any tips to protect yourself if you are extremely nice?

    Trying to teach myself not to be super nice to everyone. It is hard to be cold and not caring all the time when it is not in your nature. I get so drained always dealing with aggressive and overly ambitious people.

    How do you sensitive ones deal with the masses??

  2. #2

    Default

    The problem is it is hard to break your own personality and nature... Why do you feel you have to be super nice? Are you doing it because you feel you need to be appreciated, or that you need to "heal the world"?

    I guess the first step is accepting that not everyone is super nice. In fact, the ones that appear to need help - i.e the agressive and ambitious peple - can smell a super nice person off the gun. Typically they know to latch on and use you for their own good without needing to appreciate you.

    The thing is, the more you make yourself available, the more people will use you. Maybe try your hardest to not get involved with things - if people ask you for help then it's in your control to accept it. Just don't go searching for people to help.

    Just try to view the world as the masses do - expecting everyone to be as nice as you is just setting yourself up for disappointment - as you are already finding really!

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by lifeisabeach View Post
    How do you sensitive ones deal with the masses??
    I don't know how to do that either. I'm trying to figure that out for myself as well.
    But I know one thing: I'm not going to give in and grow cynical and cold, because that'd be like murdering the best part of me.

  4. #4
    Butterfly Mage

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    I've faced a similar problem having a career in criminal justice. What I've had to learn to accept that not everyone is interested in living a drug-free life and not everyone is interested in turning away from a life of crimeThere have been cases where the person insists upon destructive, unlawful, and antisocial behavior. Sometimes I just have to get the person locked up. But I can't spend too much emotional energy on it or else I would be unable to do my job

  5. #5

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    Well... I'm kind of in the oppsoite situation. We would make for a good buddy-cop movie. o.o

  6. #6
    Catperson

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    I think I have a very weird personality... I'm very introverted and shy, but everyone who talks to me thinks I'm really fun and nice. I honestly don't get it lol

  7. #7
    Supersam1223

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kara View Post
    cynical and cold
    That's me!

  8. #8
    EmLamby

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    Don't be "nice". Be polite! And if someone wrongs you or tears you down, politely disagree with them or ignore them. Then again, sometimes anger can drive you to really want to knock the you-know-what out of someone, and for this, I suggest a big plushie of sorts. Don't worry, it won't hurt them. Maul away!

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by lifeisabeach View Post
    Trying to teach myself not to be super nice to everyone. It is hard to be cold and not caring all the time when it is not in your nature. I get so drained always dealing with aggressive and overly ambitious people.

    How do you sensitive ones deal with the masses??
    The world has a lack of nice people bigger that the national debt. Don't add to that shortage!

    If someone can't appreciate you being nice, don't be nice, but, again, be polite!

  10. #10

    Default

    I'm usually nice to people until they give me a reason not to be. My brothers girlfriend found that out today when she started making little snobby comments about me.

    I just looked at her and said "You were edging toward the list, but now you're on it."

    I don't think she understood what I meant. It's the 'shit list', the list of people I don't do nice things for at all and, depending on how bad they were to me, I'll try to cause issues whenever possible. In a sneaky little passive aggressive way. Why? Because if I'm not nice I'm mean. *Evil grin* It's the nature of the weasel.

    Will it probably come back to bite my on the butt? Sure, it probably will. I'll accept the consequences.

    She's just lucky I don't mix her Nair in with her shampoo. :P

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