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Thread: Life changing decision.

  1. #1
    BabyJayk

    Exclamation Life changing decision.

    So this is a long story followed by a question. I hope to hear from people who have experienced something similar in their lives and how they handled it.

    It all started when my Mom found one of my pacifiers under the couch. ( I was at home between Leases for the summer all of you college kids know what I am talking about) Needless to say it finally dawned on her what I am dealing with. At first she was really mad and yelled at me and told me "just change your prespective" and " just don't do it anymore" then after talking to my Grandpa and telling him (thank you mom) she thought it was a past life that was somehow entering my current one and that I have some kind of ability to latch onto other peoples memories as well as my own (???Like a mind reader???). Anyway, so now she wants me to see a hypno-therapist for some past life regression (aptly named) to see what went wrong in my past life and get rid of it.

    In response to this I got her to look at the "toddler time" time site, for those of you that are familiar, and she looked at this psychological approach to infantilism. After this she is avoiding talking to me about my "problem".

    So hear is my issue. I am not sure I want to give it up. I mean my girlfriend/ mommy says she would miss it because it makes her feel closer to me. But at the same time I can see my Mom's point on how this could ruin my life. I don't really want to give it up, but I feel that maybe I should for the good of others around me. But I don't even know if I can. Its like cutting off a part of my personality. I am just really really confused.

  2. #2

    Default

    Quite frankly I get the impression that your mom is a stupid, overreacting imbecile. I don't think that you should let her choose how you live your adult life, but you can at least keep your AB/DL stuff as far away from her as possible so it is HER fault if SHE goes looking for it.

    It is only a "problem" if it is affecting you in a negative way. To me it sounds like SHE is the problem, not infantalism. If you have someone special in your life who accepts this and likes it I don't see why you should sacrifice your relationship just to make your MOM who doesn't even need to be involved with this happy.


    Maybe I would have a different perspective if I was in your shoes. But where I'm standing she is the one causing you grief for something she really doesn't need to be involved with. If you were younger I might have more sympathy with her, but you're 20.


    I don't see how this is going to ruin your life unless you are publicly displaying that you are an infantalist. As long as you take reasonable precautions so that stuff like photos don't exist you should be ok.

  3. #3

    Default

    I had thoughts of giving this up before when dealing with acceptance issues. I loved this part of me as much as I hated it and as a result it caused a lot of inner turmoil. Now, at this point in my life, I have come to accept it and am extremely happy I didn't kill this part of me.

    When it comes to giving it up it should be for YOU and you alone. You don't have to be the hero and give it up for the good of others. If it doesn't harm you or anyone else feel free to enjoy it !

    Good luck, I hope whatever decision you make is the right one for you!

  4. #4
    alu

    Default

    I does seem that your mum doesn't want you to be a AB/DL and that she doesn't want what you want. Just tell her that it's what you want and that she will have to accept what her son is.Also it seems your mum has acceptance issues and is trying to change you. Go with your feelings if you dont want to give up being a AB\DL dont give it up. Your Life Your Choices.

  5. #5

    Default

    Your mom loses all credibility when she thought hypno-therapy to heal a past life was a legitimate solution.

    Try to give it up, if you think it's best. Odds are not in your favour, and it could just make you miserable trying to repress it. Fair warning.

  6. #6
    LittleDrummerGirl

    Default

    Don't listen to her! Being an AB/DL has never hurt anyone (well, not that many people)! The psychiatrist will only say that this isn't really a problem.

  7. #7
    BabyJayk

    Default

    Well she made some legitimate points. I want to have a home, and a family one day. What would my kids think if they ever found out? I also have a kind of high profile career. If the wrong person found out it could ruin my life. I intend to at least humor her by going to see this hypno-therapist but I don't know what to do then.

  8. #8

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by BabyJayk View Post
    Well she made some legitimate points. I want to have a home, and a family one day. What would my kids think if they ever found out? I also have a kind of high profile career. If the wrong person found out it could ruin my life. I intend to at least humor her by going to see this hypno-therapist but I don't know what to do then.
    Your status line suggest you are IC. I see no reason why your kids would need to find out that you are anything more than that.

    If you have a high profile career then you obviously need to take precautions so that people don't find out about it. But what you do in the bedroom really shouldn't matter in regard to your career. Why would something like this even come up?

    Why do these things even matter right now? I want to have a home and a family one day too and I am also looking at a good career down the road. Obviously when I have a family I will have to make sacrifices so that everything works out, but I don't see why that should take away from indulging in it now to a reasonable extent.

  9. #9

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by BabyJayk View Post
    Well she made some legitimate points. I want to have a home, and a family one day. What would my kids think if they ever found out? I also have a kind of high profile career. If the wrong person found out it could ruin my life. I intend to at least humor her by going to see this hypno-therapist but I don't know what to do then.
    My question is... why would you raise your kids to have a problem with it? If you raise your kids to be open minded people they shouldn't have any problem accepting anyone, especially their parents... honestly I can't see how a child would have a problem with it. Worst comes to worst, don't let them find out XD

    Oh... and about the hypno therapist thing... have some fun with the therapist :P Say you're getting something and keep saying you lost it and at the end say you feel much better ^_^ Will be quite amusing :P

  10. #10
    BabyJayk

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by PrettyFox View Post
    My question is... why would you raise your kids to have a problem with it? If you raise your kids to be open minded people they shouldn't have any problem accepting anyone, especially their parents... honestly I can't see how a child would have a problem with it. Worst comes to worst, don't let them find out XD

    Oh... and about the hypno therapist thing... have some fun with the therapist :P Say you're getting something and keep saying you lost it and at the end say you feel much better ^_^ Will be quite amusing :P

    My problem is this. My high profile career is an Army officer. I am already commissioned. ( Yes I am very young to be a 2LT but I am just good like that, and it was only about a month ago) I want my sons to be proud of me in the way that we were all once proud of our dad's "my dad is stronger than your dad" thing. I want them to look up to me so badly because I never was able to look up to my Dad. Thats hard to do when you know your Dad regresses, or is even IC (mine is very mild). So thats why I thought she had a point.

    Also what if one of my men found out?
    That would be a career disaster.



    I would like to thank all of you for your support. I can't put into words how the support some of you have shown me just now has helped.
    Last edited by BabyJayk; 04-Jul-2011 at 03:29.

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