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Thread: Anyone else feel out of place in the AB world at times, perhaps cynical of it?

  1. #1

    Default Anyone else feel out of place in the AB world at times, perhaps cynical of it?

    Just something on my mind and I needed to kinda have an outlet. Recently in the past few years, I've felt a little out of place with the AB world as a whole. I've become a bit cynical and and not sure why. Maybe it's cause my baby side has been hurt a lot over the years, and it's hard for me to relate to other ABs because I don't go for the cutesy stuff and my experiences have thus far been in the negative category.

    I can't lose myself into the drivel that passes for kids shows today or kid movies. However, there are some exceptions to the case if I find something that looks good to me; and that's rare of me to find something I like in this day and age that's not too cute or full of juvenile potty jokes whereas I prefer more grownup jokes.

    I feel as I get older, dealing with the diapers, and other issues AB is not as important because of the drama I have faced with the AB side over the years. I feel a bit down sometimes when I read about people getting to be babied, when I've never had that option since I can't afford to use any services that are out there for that. I have other things I'd rather spend my money on anyway if I can.

    Plus, I'm not desperate to go out and do something stupid just for a thrill or to satisfy a fetish. That's dumb.

    Due to Asperger's; I never really grew up in a lot of ways so I feel out of place a lot of times in the grown-up world as well. I don't get into talking about politics, religion or the like as I detest both politics and religion with a passion and find both boring. I am a sports fan yeah, but that's an obsession of mine. I deal with things as best as I can and yet, I would love just once to be babied and see how it feels. I feel like an overgrown 8-year-old with a licence to drink alcoholic drinks to be honest more than anything else.

    I've done the daddy thing before, but that didn't work out as there was outside interference that got in the way of my relationship wth the AB girl. I've found AB girls to be fickle with daddies and who they pick to be their daddy. So, I've kinda given up on it. I guess lately, everything has made me a big, giant cynical person who can't decide what he wants in life.

    I was wondering if anyone else felt the way I do at times. Just kinda curious.


  2. #2


    I would say that their is really a scale when it comes to AB - just because we all are labelled the same, the actual level of involvement can be very different. For me, although I'm more DL than AB, I still enjoy being looked after when padded - just having someone to care for me. But I don't need the cartoons/colouring etc. So I also feel a bit out of place at times on here, only because I don't have the right mindset to imagine the baby scenarios that well. However, through my contact with the site I'm learning a lot, and widening my horizons really - so rather than feeling cynical, I feel like a baby learning about the world for the first time.

    As for your personal experiences with AB play - remember the majority of us don't have that luxury - so while it gets you down, I don't know of many members who use a professional service - and only a lucky few of us get to have an AB aware partner. And finding AB girls for daddy play is fairly unlikely, I'd say most happens through a relationship rather than purely looking for a daddy.

    However, I agree that there seems to be a trend towards exhibitionist posting - but if you read most replies, the community discourages it - these members are outliers rather than representatives.

    So I guess I can understand your cynical view somewhat, but I guess I just see it as learning about the world, rather than disapproving of it.

    I hope this helps!

  3. #3


    I share you cynical view, honestly somedays i wish i was back at begging of this long road from 14 i've had potential gf from these kinda site or daddy LG based arrangements nothing has ever come through even after 8yrs of looking and yes
    maybe I have finally found an LG but its going to take a long time before we have a concrete foundation. But I've found myself being very critical and angry at the way things work and certain site where chat is just constant couples going off on private endeavors but then again i think to myself it'll be my turn soon =] and then BAM! happy me you know everybody is always supportive and they say wait it out in the long run it'll be much better blah blah blah but i've rushed stuff and completely f****d it up but my journey from TB - Daddy is if anything something I will always remeber during my years growing up and when I eventually have my kids and they have some weird habbits or lifestyle I will be 100% supportive like my parents are of me.. given I won't be all let me change you and baby you thats just creepy and very fake!

  4. #4


    A lot of times I feel like I'm unlikely to attract a female companion, and even if I did then there's slim chance that she would accept me being AB/DL. And from watching others I can see that trying to find a partner who is AB/DL is hopeless.

    Being AB/DL frequently makes me feel like the world is too competitive. I think maybe it has lead me to over analyze the whole human mating ritual.

  5. #5


    @ WildThing

    I can understand about feeling out of place at times in the diaper community. I have been a few times to the local munch and everytime I felt completely alone. All the regulars are carrying on conversations from the previous munch, talking about broadway plays or sports or some other topic I know absolutely nothing about.

  6. #6


    I don't recognize it as AB/DL, but as something to do with Aspergers. That's where I get it from.. always feeling out of place in any group, craving for acceptance. I think that maybe you hoped to find it in the AB world. Thinking it would be different, but fact is, it's just like any other group and people with Asperger's don't mesh well with any group. There is always gonna be that division you feel. I know, I feel it too..even though I have people telling me that's just me. Maybe it's not what you wanna hear, but I think that's the core of the problem.

  7. #7


    I find that I am actually very lightly engaged in AB activites and my main AB tie is really just my teddy bear. Occasionally I will use a paci but it no longer feels as awesome as it used to. Even more rarely still I will drink from my bottle, and while it feels amazing there are only a few things I actually drink from it. Normally some sort of strong fruit drink like cran-ras.

    Old kids shows were infinitely better than modern ones, I wish sunday morning cartoons would come back. They make me feel so awesome because they were more or less my childhood as far as cartoons go.

  8. #8


    The word I'd use is confused. Well especially during my discovery. I was pure DL at the start, and like you said I found anything "cutesy" completely uninteresting - for kids and girls only. I only actually wore like twice a year anyway (with no idea why I wanted to). So yeah, football/gym/drinking beer at the weekends was my scene (and still is to some degree).

    Then when I recently got pulled over to the dark side of AB, it almost felt like I was getting a buzz from watching kids films, acting a bit immature, and having a stuffed animal on my bed again. Why? I have no idea!

    With regards to potential partners - well I've never ever revealed anything AB in a relationship, but will probably wish to do so in the future. It could be some dodgy territory though, we'll see. To be honest I would love to find a mummy who could baby me (wouldn't most of us?) but that's wishful thinking and really isn't a priority at the moment. And as for those pay per hour adult nurseries... well the fantasy seems nice, but the reality is I'd probably feel really awkward and out of place - plus it's a waste of money like you said!

  9. #9


    Not being an AB, I would have to say, yes.

    Mycomfort zone is limited, to the point of being unnerved when other folks play around with baby talk. It is like scratching a chalkboard to me.

  10. #10


    My AB world is at home and no where else. Though my wife accepts me and wants me happy, she doesn't particularly participate, and that's okay. It's always been personal to me and until 3 years ago, something I kept hidden from her. I really don't have a grand desire to share it with anyone. It lives in my own mind and imagination, and I'm content with that. I have no trouble regressing, and I'm not really into kid's shows on t.v. I get off on diapers and that's enough.

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