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Thread: How I manage the sleep-wetting ...

  1. #1

    Default How I manage the sleep-wetting ...

    Hi all,
    I'm new here. I'm IC, never considered myself TB/AB/DL though I certainly don't dislike wearing protection in order to stay dry. That's probably because I've never been dry at night, so I've never known anything else.
    I'm curious how my own feelings relate to AB/DL. There is certainly something child-like about part of who I am and I don't mind that at all.

    Anyhow - that is another topic

    I just wanted to tell how I manage at night, what works for me. It's not that I would advocate it, I'm aware that everyone is different in that respect. Not only in their particular incontinence but also in their likes and dislikes. I've read some comments from people who seem to hate plastic cover pants, for instance. That seems to me rather a preference than due to that they should be no good or useless - and sure, that's a valid reason too.

    Just don't shoot me over what I'm saying please
    (see, I've been active on quite some software development forums and really, people do get very intense about details at times ...)

    Ok, so I'm a sleep-wetter. It varies hugely how much I lose per night: from nothing at all to, well, lots. As a child I wore those side-snap plastic panties with pockets in them that accommodated a diaper, and that worked just fine. At least when lying down, because the occasional time that I needed it out of bed I found that it leaked simetimes because the whole thing tended to sag.

    In my teens these pants either ceased to exist or they were thought inappropriate for an incontinent teenager - maybe because people thought they are too much reminiscent of what babies wear, I dunno.

    I've used pretty much every kind of disposable that was out there, and to be short, I dislike all of them. They made me feel like a patient. And most of them still leaked, mostly because I sleep on my side. So we experimented with using plastic cover panties, but that didn't work very well either. I now understand why: plastic pants don't hold in free liquid. They are meant to isolate wet diapers from the outside world.

    I managed after that by using those mattress protectors. I don't like them (too medical again) and not really safe either.

    Recently I've started to experiment again because I noticed that you can buy a lot more different things online than they sell at our local pharmacy. Probably partly due to AB/DL folk, so here's a big "thank you" for that!
    (I'm serious! I think that because AB/DL ppl are a lot more outspoken as we closet-incontinents who are ashamed of our "problem" ... apparently diaper producers picked that up, and that is a good thing)

    I think I've found a pretty near-perfect combination now. I usually have Tena Comfort Maxi diapers, and put those in a plastic cover pant that has a terry outside layer. This pant is not too tight, but fitting enough to make the diaper fit against my body. Over that, I then put a (much) larger plastic pant.
    This seems to work really well: on the occasions that I wet very much, it can fail to be absorbed in time. It may leak through the legs of that terry covered pant, but it ends up between that and the large plastic pant, where it is absorbed quickly in that terry layer.
    It's sort of a "backup failsafe system" and I'm quite enthusiastic about it.

    On top of that I must admit that I find the terry covered panty almost illegally cute

    I still want to figure out if cloth diapers would work for me. They seem to absorb very well, and I'm also trying to consider the environment.
    And another is about the plastic pants. I really dislike that shiny sort of plastic that this Suprima brand uses. I find it awful because it clings to the skin like clingfilm. There exist a type of plastic that feels almost like silk. It is very skin-friendly. It is textured like woven material so it doesn't cling like smooth plastic does. It also looks much less "medical" and awkward.
    I've found a French manufacturer who uses that plastic, but unfortunately the pants they make are of such a lousy fit that they are completely useless.

    So there is still a lot room for improvement. I've thought at times to start my own business and do it myself, but I'm probably a very lousy businesswoman

    Ok, hitting the "post" button now; thanks for reading!

  2. #2

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    I really like this as a fellow bed-wetter all my life this has given me a few tips i have never really gotten into plastic pants because of their difficulty to hide in most of my life. But ill definetly have to give them a shot.

    I was wondering why you considered mattress protectors unhealthy ? I used them a lot myself and havent heard that at all, i also grew up using the alarmed mats and that helped me gain a measure of control if in really annoying/horrible way to do it.

    but anyway thx for the tips i might try a few of them out ^^

  3. #3

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    Oh sorry if that wasn't clear ... I don't think they're unhealthy: I think they are pretty harmless
    I just don't like them.

    But what I don't get is: what would you want to hide plastic pants for? if you've been a bedwetter all your life, it's hardly a secret that you need some or other form of protection?

    And also, they're small when folded up. They take up a lot less space than diapers, so didn't you find it difficult to hide those then?

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kara View Post
    But what I don't get is: what would you want to hide plastic pants for? if you've been a bedwetter all your life, it's hardly a secret that you need some or other form of protection?

    And also, they're small when folded up. They take up a lot less space than diapers, so didn't you find it difficult to hide those then?
    Hmm well that's a fair point but for most people myself included i think i have hidden my bed-wetting from everyone except my immediate family and they wanted me to control it though methods rather than things like diapers and plastic pants.

    For someone with an actual problem It seems very silly to hide upon reflection I suppose in that instance I was thinking from more of an ab/dl perspective where they are harder to hide because you may have to clean or wash them and such which is why most ab/dl prefer purely disposable products.

    Anyway this really did make me re-think getting plastic pants I'm having a bit more trouble than I was at the moment going through a phase or something and it does seem more logical that a full mattress protector (not that I like those either) ^^

  5. #5

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    As I am sure other have indicated - a lot of this is down to personal choice. I hate crinlky plastic but find that a disposable bed pad - I use a 40cmX90cm one is fine for dealing with diaper leakage - even if it is quite a lot - they are rated for over 1000ml. and have a very soft plastic backing- but i wouldn'y like to put the capacity rating to the test. My partner was concerned about the duvet getting wet - but as most leaks are from the leg and waist bands and gravity assists, this is not much of a problem.

  6. #6

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    True it is not easy to find what works best for us, and I too hate going through all the trials and failures. I use to be a side sleeper as well, but because of some health issues and my incontinence I have found that I stay on my back now which has helped on leaks. Like you I have tried all kinds of diapers and protection and for me right now, I have found that using Abena XPlus and a pad under me works. I too don't like the fact the pad is more medicalish but at least I don't have to do laundry when I do leak.

    I have thought about the cloth for night but my wife has ruled them out because she doesn't want more laundry and doesn't want either of us to have to soak them in a pail till wash time. So for me, I may never know if cloth would be better for me at night. Keep experimenting and let us know if you find that perfect combination that works for you. We all learn and grow from each other by sharing what has or hasn't worked.

    Thanks for sharing!

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by checkingoutall View Post
    True it is not easy to find what works best for us, and I too hate going through all the trials and failures. I use to be a side sleeper as well, but because of some health issues and my incontinence I have found that I stay on my back now which has helped on leaks.
    How do you manage that? I have on occasion tried that, but quickly discovered that no matter how firmly I decide to sleep on my back before falling asleep, my sleeping me promptly turns on her side after my consciousness has closed it's eyes



    Quote Originally Posted by checkingoutall View Post
    Thanks for sharing!
    You're welcome!

    ---------- Post added at 21:17 ---------- Previous post was at 21:07 ----------



    Quote Originally Posted by dayannight View Post
    As I am sure other have indicated - a lot of this is down to personal choice.
    Yes, that's to be expected.



    Quote Originally Posted by dayannight View Post
    I hate crinlky plastic but find that a disposable bed pad - I use a 40cmX90cm one is fine for dealing with diaper leakage - even if it is quite a lot - they are rated for over 1000ml. and have a very soft plastic backing- but i wouldn't like to put the capacity rating to the test. My partner was concerned about the duvet getting wet - but as most leaks are from the leg and waist bands and gravity assists, this is not much of a problem.
    Pads are definitely better than a wet bed. *Anything* is better than a wet bed, I don't think that disagree on that.
    I think that I also disliked the pads for much the same reason that I dislike travelling while having to hold more than one bag (backpack, suitcase). I have a strong preference for 'as little complexity as possible' because I'm very chaotic.

  8. #8

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    Staying on my back wasn't easy at first but after a while my body has gotten use to it. There are times I want to sleep on my side but then my mind goes back to the feeling of pee going down the sides of me and getting the bed wet.
    I really hate sleeping in a wet bed so I have told myself to keep from it, sleep on back. Am I on my back 100% of the time, no, but a good 90-95% of the time.

    Because of my incontinence it's taken me some time to learn how to protect the beds I stay in. I make sure I have one pad for every night just in case of leaks. The pads I use are a nice size and because of it, I have been able to rest without concern. Yes it's extra things to carry but getting the sleep is more important than extra luggage/bag. One thing that helps me is that I am in the IT, computer field, I carry laptop with me just about everywhere and I always keep an extra diaper in there. I also have an extra bag that looks like a laptop bag that I use as a diaper bag that I take with me everywhere. No one has even noticed or said anything.

    Learning what works for us isn't easy since there isn't anything out there that works the same way for each and everyone of us.

  9. #9

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    I'm not incontinent, but rather a DL/AB, but I can offer some help. I enjoy wearing cloth, and my plastic pants of choice is the Leakmaster highback. They are very soft and very comfortable. They seem to hold up quite well if you hand wash them with dish washing detergent and thoroughly rinse them. Angela Baur hasn't been on the site in awhile, but she has always been incontinent, and she prefers gauze pre-fold cloth diapers. These are what I wear to bed. They will enfold around more of you, and with the Leakmaster plastic pants, I really have to flood the diaper before I leak, and even then it has only been a spot.

    My concern is that you may not be able to get the Leakmaster plastic pants in the U.K. or the Netherlands, or if you can, shipping would be very expensive. Maybe someone knows of a local supplier for Europe.

  10. #10

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    Kara:

    Try this: Put a cotton stretch pant over the diaper, then put the plastic pant over that. The stretch pant will hold the diaper against your skin, so the diaper traps up soaks up the urine rather than letting it run down your skin and out the side of the diaper. The stretch pant will also absorb small leaks. If it's inside a plastic pant, the plastic pant will contain it.

    I use an Abri-fix cotton stretch pant or a Tena knit pant. You can also use athletic compression shorts, but they aren't designed to go around a diaper (especially in the crotch) and aren't absorbent. Abena and Tena also make mesh stretch pants, which will help keep the diaper against your skin, but won't absorb leaks.

    I use a pad (Abri-Form X-Plus or Tena Night Super) instead of a diaper. It's the same as the top Abena or Tena diaper, just without the plastic and tape on the side. The plastic doesn't absorb anything or contain anything, anyway, so why pay for them?

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