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Thread: potty training your kid? or letting them have a choice?

  1. #1

    Default potty training your kid? or letting them have a choice?

    I watched a rerun of nanny 911 or super nanny one of those nanny shows, and the parents had let their children who were aged around 5-7 wear diapers I think cause they werent all potty trained yet...the nanny strongly disapproved of it, saying babying them is wrong and all that jazz and took their baby blankets and pacis away saying they are useless security blankets and holding them back.

    I honestly dont think no harm can come of it to be honest I think that letting the child chose when is the right time to potty train works out them more confidence and more self esteem. I could be wrong but I was potty trained when I was about 3 so I didnt have that option so I really dont know. I would have liked to have that option though if I ever have children I would ensure them to be independent and give them more freedom if they want to stay in diapers or potty train I will present both options to them.

    Either way I always hear parents complain they want their kids to hurry up and move out of the house and the parents dont get enough "alone" time....and then once their kid is all grown up they suddenly change their tune and say I wish they were little again

    So what do you guys think if you had a kid would you let them chose? and once you were younger would you have liked to have the option?

    oh and PS to super Nanny if you ever take my paci away you will be the one in the naughty chair

  2. #2


    Isn't giving them a choice, robbing them of it? At least in the long run? The way I see it, not many children would choose to be potty trained. It's a new and scary thing, different from what they're used to (that is, simply doing it and letting someone change them). So they would choose not to be potty trained, thus being stuck in diapers forever.

    We're the one's with the ability to choose. We're potty trained, so we can just switch between diapers and a toilet as we please (monetary and social issues notwithstanding).

  3. #3


    I think it's much better to potty train them as soon as they can be. Maybe the kids don't realize it yet, but as soon as they hit middle school, they'll be in for a world of suffering when they're teased and made fun of for wearing diapers. Not only that, but if the child is given the choice to stay in diapers, it will be far more difficult later on to actually train the body to hold it.

    Don't get me wrong. I'd be willing to let the child wear diapers later on in life if they chose to, but only if it's fully their decision and make the choice themselves. Simply not potty training them in the first place would be robbing them of the choice.

    This is just another one of those scenarios where the child needs to be told what to do, because they simply aren't old enough to make a smart decision themselves. They need to reach a certain stage of mental development and responsibility before being able to make that choice.

  4. #4


    It's seen as a sign of neglect if a child is left too long without being toilet trained, unless there are proper reasons for it.

    So no, they won't have a choice once they reach 3 years old (though they may show signs earlier).

  5. #5


    hm I never realized it would be a negative effect to leave you kids in diapers...I was just thinking super nanny was overreacting

  6. #6


    I'm in favor of personal choice, except when the person in question is not mature enough to decide. Certainly, I would take my child's feelings into account, but the decision would ultimately be mine and my spouse's. Ultimately, I don't think allowing children to put it off until they are four or five is usually in their best interest, even if they'd prefer to.

  7. #7


    Quote Originally Posted by Toddy View Post
    hm I never realized it would be a negative effect to leave you kids in diapers...I was just thinking super nanny was overreacting
    Well, it's a TV show, she probably was. However, she just reacted out of shock seeing a 7 year old running around in diapers. I must admit, even with my...inclination (the same one that drew us all to this site)...I would probably consider that poor judgment on the parents part.

  8. #8


    While personal choice is great, kids aren't developed or educated enough to make the decision on whether to be potty trained or not at that age. After being potty trained, if my child would like to wear diapers later on in life, I would let them know the ramifications and if they still want to wear, teach them how to change themselves.

    Also, I believe the school system requires children to be potty trained before entering kindergarten. If they are not you could potentially be setting your child's education back.

  9. #9


    I'd say do it for them, not to say do it really early and try to rush it so they seem normal but go at a rate suitable for them. If your child is learning slowly then that should be fine, it isn't a race and least they're learning when they need to go.

  10. #10


    In any case, how old is the episode? We should be on the look out for a new TB that claims they weren't potty trained until they were 7. :P

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